concept: me, speaking a foreign language, my pronunciation is perfect and my accent is indistinguishable from that of a native speaker. I am able to pepper my speech with slang and idioms and I can express subtle differences in meaning with ease. I have extensive knowledge of grammar and technical terms and produce well structured analyses of literature using correct writing conventions.
Me
roses are red
violets are blue
I wasn’t your first choice, but
my math teacher is becoming impatient.
Gervais speaks the truth
This was like not being able to get your Sims to follow a command…
why does this feel like a bit from parks and rec
Dragged to hell and back
sweatshirt dom
During the first season or two of Roseanne, Roseanne Barr was treated horribly by the producers, who wanted to get rid of her, even though she was the creative genius behind the show, which was based entirely on characters she had developed. She went with “success is the best revenge,” working extra hard to make sure the show hit the #1 spot, knowing at that point she could seize creative control. She hung out with the crew and supportive castmembers (including John Goodman, who flat refused to do the show without her), and put a list on her door. That list had the name of every single person who worked on the show. When they pissed her off, she’d cross off their name in red. Everyone in red was to be fired the second she was in charge. She took this policy from Machiavelli, and she made good on it. Her first move was to fire everyone who had tried to shut her down. She also promoted a number of women writers and fired a number of men writers for being sexist. So, this shirt is no lie.
These almond cookies are very aggressive.
if u feel like u dont know what ur doing w ur life just remember that venus spins backwards and we dont even fuckin know why. just do whatever you wanna honestly
thursday needs a meme, here’s my attempt to contribute. it’s thursday and i’m here to help. thanks
it’s thursday today but it’s cold outside, so here’s an update on my attempt at a thursday meme. it’s thursday and it’s cold but i’m still here to help. thanks
it’s 2015 now and thursday still needs a meme, here’s another attempt to contribute. it’s thursday and it’s a new year and as always i’m here to help. thanks
spring has sprung but thursday still needs a meme, so here’s another attempt to contribute. it’s springtime this thursday, and even as the seasons change i’m here to help. thanks
it’s a summer thursday and thursday still needs a meme, so here’s one more attempt to contribute. it’s thursday and this summer i’m here to help. thanks
Her dedication must not go unrecognized
They’re BLUE.
but mashed, they’re PURPLE??
AND WHEN SKINNED, WE SEE THE INSIDES ARE GREEN?????
WHAT THE EVERLIVING FUCK, BLUEBERRIES?!
okay I keep seeing this and I felt the need to point out that humans are in fact any shade of brown/tan on the outside, if you mash them they are red, and if you skin them they are pink. no I will not be including photos.
ok hannibal
lmao this is the hardest iv laughed all day
