i love capitalizing words that do not need to be capitalized At All so that you read them in that Important Voice

“how old are you?”

“It’s a secret :3”

“aiight so either 12 or 40 got it”

i mean the zombie apocalypse is technically just a bunch of humans voreing each other

Things I hope Tumblr will introduce in the future

- a proper way to reply to replies - making posts non-rebloggable - people you’ve blocked never showing up on your dash again, even if others reblog them - stopping porn bots - blacklist for Tumblr mobile - a clear way to show you have a new inbox message on Tumblr mobile - STOPPING PORN BOTS

It’s fun to chant “Bloody Mary” into your car’s side mirror three times and watch her jog and try to keep up.

Being a dick even to demons

I am deceased

no one is more tired of white people than steve harvey on family fued

Ellen is a dick Lmfao

So I got this ad on youtube...

It’s for U.S. Cellular, specifically advertising how great their streaming service is. You can even , the guy in the ad says, stream hours of grass mowing.

And I go… “wait a minute…that sounds weird…why hasn’t this ad ended yet?”

And I look at the bottom. 

the ad is seven hours long.

UPDATE

i’m half an hour in

the guy’s come back a couple times. his mower broke down and he went to get more gas. he came back and started it up again, drove around a few more times making comments about it being fun and “you still watchin? weird.” After a bit he took out a ruler and started measuring the grass.

He pulled out a book and a lawn chair and started reading, but he just left and said he’ll be back soon

he brought out an umbrella but it fell over so he left and came back and tried to fix it but it completely broke so he stalked off, dragging the chair behind him. i’m loving this.

HE BROUGHT OUT A HAND-HELD UMBRELLA

he’s really getting into the book

He put away the umbrella and book and stuff and now he’s measuring the grass again.

HE’S GONNA PLAY CROQUET

the sprinklers turned on…i’m two hours into this thing

more compelling than real tv tbh

LMFAO

she need some milk

nigga she had on a breathing tube lmfao

HOW ADORABLE IS THIS KITTY

*slams desk* THIS IS THE KIND IF CONTENT THE UNIVERSE NEEDS MORE OF, DAMNIT!

@kilifilithorinandco

“mew!” *grunt of agreement* “mew!” *grunt of agreement* *kitten climbs on top of man’s head* “mew!” *grunt of agreement*

The kind of quality content I need on my dash :D

Hehehe kitty kitty

So soft and cute and good :D

i dab every morning when i wake up

if you could also stop porn blogs from following us all, that would be great

holy shit!!!!!

yall are fuckin stupid, halloween can’t be on friday the 13th 

does the 30th of october ring any bells 

do you have any proof?

So I found this caterpillar on my way to class

We’re bros

I named him chicken nugget

Aaaa he’s turning a duller color… I hope he’s alright

So apparently chicken nugget is a spicebush swallowtail and they turn yellow before they pupate. He was making little silk things everywhere Bruh this caterpie is going to evolve to metapod today my boy isn’t messing around

update hes entirely yellow now

i made him a tube room

hes crawlin all over the place checking it out

its happening

False alarm he moved a bit This guy

??? caterpie doesnt evolve into kakuna

whats he doing

its happening part 2 For Real This Time

chicken nugget using those advanced tactics balancing my man doesnt do anything halfway

i put on some tunez for him so he can get into the metamorphazone

sorry for keeping you all in suspense but chicken nugget is doing fine and he has a cool hat now

hes been chillin like this for a couple days 

hes been in cocoon for 10 days now 🎉🐛🎉

let me know how he’s doing soon

HES BUSTIN OUT

im going to sleep, chicken nugget is snoozin and ill check up on him as soon as i wake up

hope he doesnt party too hard 

🐛 💤 💤

hes gone goth hes in his emoteen stage

CHICKEN NUGGET IS A CHICKEN WING NOW BABY WE HAVE LIFTOFF!!!!!

hes’s in a bigger container than the one in the pic now but im gonna let my home boy find his way in the world after he gets used to his wings a little bit

this kid doesnt have a bad angle dang

https://youtu.be/TwpFUQzvRp0

there he goes he’s free and im so proud and a little sad

this was an incredible experience

(thats my family oohing and ahhing in the background)

this post just cant be on its own. it needs the accompanying pic “when you’re level 80” that is exactly the same image, but the stick has glowing runes on it and the crabs are purple

Ok, I had nothing better to do with my monday night

This gets better every time i see it.