Obscure mc trivia my beloved

aren't gorillas gentle giants or something. i stay out of his way, he doesn't maul me, we have a nice time picking out clothes together in opposite sides of the mall

Male gorillas are super aggressive and territorial. Also they interpret nearly every human mannerism as a sign of aggression or a challenge. Smiling and eye contact are both things that zookeepers have to be taught to suppress when they’re in the vicinity of gorillas.

Well unless the mall is his native territory I think I'm fine, I wasn't planning on smiling at him

This is all irrelevant because the obvious answer is five black mambas. I mean, that’s not actually very many snakes, and malls are fucking huge. And unlike a gorilla you can definitely outrun a snake if it does show up. Find an open space in the mall where you can see any snake coming and just hangout out there. Fucking easy.

Misguided! I would much rather have a mallmate I can easily see and hear coming. I'm confident I can stay out of the gorilla's way, but if I step on a snake or one otherwise gets the jump on me, it's all over.

It's not just about the physical danger either, it's about my mental health. One gorilla, unless he's actively mad at me, I just keep a healthy distance between us and make sure I never get trapped. With the snakes, it requires a lot more constant vigilance

They should substitute "chimpanzee" for "gorilla" in this hypothetical.

if it was a chimp i'm taking the fucking snakes

Black mambas have a reputation build on being very venomous and very fast. I'm not sure why you would think you could outrun one (or five) in an enclosed space like a mall.

Malls usually have pretty slick floors, and escalators. I’d choose the gorilla simply because I think that would make an more interesting story (and a better-selling autobiography, I Survived the Mall Gorilla) but I think I’d stand a pretty good chance at avoiding the mamba. They’re fast and aggressive and will chase you but unless we started immediately beside each other I think my sneakers would have the terrain advantage over scutes.

this is too good to leave hidden in the replies

fucking enamored with the implication that this gorilla is fully intelligent but is trying to manufacture plausible deniability like the movie barnyard

(X)

some tom cardy out of context because I just think he's neat

I drew an official poster for the legendary wild west story, The ballad of Smokin' Joe for the one and only Tom Cardy! You can get it! For real! Put it on your wall! Right here!

all religion is true but all the different gods are fighting each other so they ignore us

this is like, one version of an idea where reality is the integral across all possible worlds. and the actual world is all the parts that don't cancel out. or something.

Combative Demiurge Pantheism

For my first project in my photo class

So i might need a new drawing tablet

What have I done

these are all the same sort of animal. do you understand.

these are all small skittish creatures that love to bite and are found in drawers of garages and classrooms. they’re all related and in the same small biter family. weird little kids who play with them while they’re distracted and have empathy for them can tame them and become these beasts companions

Thank the Lord someone understands

Props to Blumhouse for not making William the suave Tumblr Sexyman that everyone sees him as in fanon but instead this sad old man with a receding hairline 

michael mcchill my beloved <3

fucking help

it’s him! it’s the man behind the slaughter!

Dress

c.1881

Fashion Museum Bath Facebook

the little iridescent things are the wings of jewel beetles! very popular in the 19th century (in the west) and for centuries before that (in the Asian countries they come from)

Original Tweet and ANN article

anyways reminder that scars of any kind are morally neutral and not bad or harmful to show. if that shit is healed and not a literal open wound it is not fucking bad. it is not okay to shame or trigger warning a normal fucking part of someone’s body, including and especially when it’s a sign of physical or mental illness.

look every single time I make posts like this someone comes on my post like “not self harm scars though! those are triggering!” and fucking. think about what you’re implying for just one second here. you’re saying that if anyone has ever even once hit a mental point where they harmed themself in a way that left a lasting mark they can never show their body uncensored again. this is okay to you? you think this is fucking okay?

also, to expand on this: do not assume you know what are and aren't self harm scars. i have 'traditional self harm scar' looking scars that are not self harm, just that i have a cat and scar easily. i have scars that do not look like self harm scars that very much are. you do not have the right to go up to someone and ask "hey, what are you scars from so i can decide if i can censor your body?", nor the right to assume the origin of someone's scars in order to censor their body. In general, no one's scars or any other part of their body is your business

HEY THIS IS A BANGER FUCKING LINE.

Image description: a screenshot of tags that say, “the human condition can not be censored and the human condition is fucking scarred”, end image description.

Normalize seeing a scar and thinking to yourself "I am glad that this person survived whatever caused that."

I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. A guy asked me what the Spanish word for tortilla was once and now I dream of kissing him under the moonlight

this same idiot: what kind of animal is the pink panther

me, already taking off my clothes: benjamin you’re so fucking stupid

oh my god the original out in the wild

what's that comment? "you wouldn't use a rapier in the same situation you'd use a folding chair"