What

me: i love minding my own Business !

something: happens

me:

Do you ever daydream about stupid stuff so hard that you end up breaking your own heart???? Is that just me????

I hate when people ask me “what did you do today?” like buddy listen I woke up at noon and then it was five pm okay I don’t kn o w

someone take me out. either in the date way or the assassination way

all these fuckboys but who is the fuckfather

zeus

#i meAN YOU’RE PROBABLY NOT WRONG

fuckboy: I wanna put my dick in it. zeus: my son

Why can’t I stop watching this

I swear to god I’ve watched this like fifty times and I can’t stop laughing

He l p m e

I forgot I reblogged this to my main and I’m dYING

I wanna be Mariah Carey when I grow up

Friend: complains about their boyfriend 

Me and my single ass:

Paolo Sebastian spring 2018 couture

so when are men gonna realize that women aren’t complicated and we’re actually just normal people and it’s men that lack emotional depth and interesting personalities?

Yeah….. Except I’m an emotional man with tons of depth. I speak 5 languages and play every instrument known. I can build a house. I can plant a garden. I know a little bit about everything.

Maybe women really are cunts who just seek to destroy men and invalidate them?

i have no idea how to reply to this cause it’s simply just the funniest thing i’ve ever read and nothing will ever top it