come get ya juice
RIP founding fathers, you would have loved spilling the tea
One of my favorite history facts I haven’t been able to get the time together to verify is that the other founding fathers used to make fun of George Washington because he was blessed with cake. Ya boi had a dump truck ass and was dummy thicc. He had cheeks that would go clapping.
So when roasting him they’d talk about him being calopygian or having a womanly behind.
So yeah, wig wearing drama queens gossiping. That sounds right.
The story of Dumptruck George deserves to be shared
Reminder that people aren't entitled to see into your decision-making process unless you've agreed that they are. Just told a business acquaintance that I'd "just finished up my previous commitment". It's not their problem to know that it was DND.
Just to make sure no one schedules meetings on top of my D&D sessions, BUT ALSO to avoid any chance of my coworkers figuring out when I’m playing D&D, I always block sessions out on my calendar with the appointment title:
“Conflict Resolution Seminar”
It’s not a lie, I’m discussing with a small group how to resolve conflict. Not my fault that the answer is often violence.
Bro I love you but if I saw in the communal calendar that one of my coworkers had attended thirty conflict resolution seminars over the last year then I would immediately assume they had committed innumerable acts of workplace violence and management was too scared to fire them
Something about this is so genuine and funky. It feels so natural that if I heard the correct lyrics it wouldn't process as right in my brain. This man yelling about his green tea and watermelon sour patch kids fits so well with the live music playing in the background, the atmosphere, the whole situation. It's like some reverse slam poetry talking about how good life is and how the simple pleasures should be enjoyed. I'm in love with this tik tok.
old alt rock fans in the notes are like:
1) this slaps and actually sounds like a lot of the classics
2) if i went to a concert and they played this i wouldnt even question it. id be like FUCK yeah they were watermelon!!!
this is a poll about whether you think the things people say about your birth order are true or not
only children = spoilt, entitled, lonely, etc
eldest children = stand-in parent, takes on too many responsibilities, chronically stressed
middle children = special snowflakes who always have to carve out opposite personalities to their siblings
youngest children = parent’s favourite child, a little bit spoilt, a little bit of a copycat, you know how it is
THE TUMBLR HORSE DERBY
WELCOME TO THE FIRST TUMBLR HORSE DERBY (that i know of, anyway)
HOW TO HORSE: 🐎🐎🐎 - Vote for your FAVOURITE horse to make them go faster! (yknow, like those carnival horse derby games!) MAY THE BEST HORSE WIN
(also sample size reblog yadda yadda yadda HORSE)
cannot stop thinking about this skit from the new i think you should leave season
what the hell
Faces carved into the walls of the Paris Catacombs
m3n4c3v35537
Frenchmen be like “this pitch black cave full of skeletons is not scary enough, I must make it worse”
der-ewige-retard
Iconic seafarer beards became a trend to scare away pesky mermaids.
Mermaid, seeing a bald pirate: Zero threat…! Mermaid, seeing a hairy, bearded pirate: If I get too close their face tentacles will eat me…!
Most mermaids only grow short beards as not to scare baby mermaids (longer beards look like the tentacled mouths of hungry squids and octopuses).
Pirates use this innate fear to their advantage to protect themselves from mermaids, hence the iconic beards and hat:
I like how this is presented as factual information
