eventually you realize you don’t want to die. you just don’t want to live the life you’re living. and slowly you try to create a life you want to live. just gotta start there.

no one needs to add “sounds fake but ok”, “no”, “well, not me”, “impossible”, etc. to this post. and i’d rather you not.

one day you think: I want to die.

and then you think, very quietly: actually. actually. I think I want a coffee. a nap. a sandwich. a book.

and I want to die turns day by day into I want to go home, I want to walk in the woods, I want to see my friend, I want to sit in the sun

I want a cleaner kitchen

I want a better job

I want to live somewhere else

I want to live

i'll do it for sam

this is everyone in the tags

“In my friend, I find a second self.”

c.s. lewis / my best friend by the coral / alivia horsley / @billypotts / hanya yanagihara / ‘after party ll’ salman toor / the kids aren’t alright by fall out boy / a summer’s tale / lorde / hanya yanagihara / abed and troy (community) with a winnie the pooh quote @weelezzer / isabel norton

https://transgenderlawcenter.org/donate

‘and fight like hell for the living’ I’M CRYING THAT’S SO POWERFUL I’M ABSOLUTELY GOING TO FIGHT LIKE HELL THANK YOU PRIDE KNIGHTS

a fools guide to not wanting to die anymore

by me, a fool who doesnt wanna die anymore 

… 8|

That’s some pretty good advice. I don’t know what’s left of my humor after ‘guess I’ll just die’ jokes but it’s worth a shot.

Personally i went from “guess I’ll die” jokes to “IF I HAVE TO BE HERE FOR 5 MORE MINUTES I PROMISE YOU I WILL BUY JUST, AN ARRAY OF CLOTHES.” and other wild hyperbolic stuff. Just replace the death part with something ridiculous and off topic. Its very entertaining

This also works with calling myself things like stupid, worthless, trash, etc. Even if you do this jokingly to yourself, your brain still believes it, and keeps up the cycle. Seriously, I found that when I stopped saying these things about myself, even jokingly, it made a massive difference.

Here’s a tip I picked up from a friend that’s helped me a lot — replace self deprecating jokes with ironically self aggrandizing jokes

Like every time I trip and fall, instead of saying “l’m just a disaster human” I say “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”

Or like, when I draw a picture I’m not 100% happy with, instead of saying “my art is trash” I say something like “you know I think it’s time we replaced the Mona Lisa”

When you do that you get to make a joke, but you’re ALSO getting practice building yourself up, y’know?

And eventually it becomes a reflex and you get so used to it that you can say nice stuff about yourself even when you AREN’T joking

This is so important

That self-aggrandizing technique is no joke.

I replaced “I’m stupid” with “I’m a God damn genius.” “Move over newton” “another masterpiece”

I replaced “gross/ disgusting” with “sexy/attractive” “the hight of elegance”

I replaced “I suck/ that sucked/ this is bad” with “fantastic”, “a lovely time”, “ swell/jolly good”

Replace every negative with a positive. Say it so sarcastically. Make it complicated make it entertaining have fun with it.

It will stop your self deprecating and build confidence. And people are more easygoing around you.

Anyway some things to follow when youre a beginner cook:

psa

no one fucking tells you this so here it is:

when signing out forms to apply for disability / filling out a form for diagnosis

you’re supposed to fill it out as you on your worst days

like, I filled out forms that said I could do most things usually

like, my doctor added in the conditions like “yeah, they can feed themselves when not stressed” “they can do this when not stressed”

but how I should have filled it out was more like

“some days I can’t feed myself” “some days I can’t leave the house”

My doctor didn’t even know this, but I talked to someone who had worked with people with both developmental and intellectual disabilities for a number of years, and she told me to write down how it is for your bad days

this should be a thing they tell you, but it isn’t

part of the reason I didn’t get my autism diagnosis as soon as I should have is because I filled out forms wrong!

This also goes for filling out forms for disabled parking rights. I’ve been rejected multiple times for a pass cause I didn’t find this out till recently.

Wow

Also you’re generally supposed to fill it out as you are without help.

That throws me too.  Because the more help I get, the more capable I get.  It’s easy to forget what happens when the help falls away even partially let alone completely.

Yeah, the way my disability lawyer has told me to fill stuff out threw me for a loop. I thought when a question asked if I can do something - for example, walk 1 mile - I would say “yes” because if its a good enough day, if I push, I can. I will hurt my health greatly by doing it, in a potentially permanent way, but technically, sometimes, I could.

He told me that if doing something costs - if it leaves you hurt, sick, whatever - then, functionally, you can’t do it, and that’s what they want to know. They don’t care if you technically CAN open a jar, if it is very difficult and painful and only sometimes successful then as far as evaluations are concerned you CAN’T.

As far as the LEGAL definition of being housebound is concerned - because I can only leave home rarely, with difficulty, and with the use of aids - I am housebound now. I always say I’m “a few hours a week away from housebound” but as far as these kind of evaluations are concerned, no, I’m just plain housebound. Same thing with time spent in bed - if on a bad day I can only get out of bed using mobility aids or crawling or with very short walks to the bathroom that make me feel ill and unbalanced, then on that day I’m bed bound.

There was an anology I read somewhere - I wanna say here on tumblr - about being able to take a hot dish out of the oven with your bare hands. Like yeah, technically, you can! You’ll badly injure yourself, likely permanently, but technically you can. But if someone said “can you take something hot out of a 400F degree oven with your bare hands” you would say NO.

The tricky thing is that these forms we fill out won’t specify the “bare hands” part, as if it is implied. You might think “well I COULD with oven mitts so I’ll say yes” but that’s not what is being asked.

If you need a walker or wheelchair or carer or (etc) to do something then you functionally CANNOT do that thing. At least as far as this stuff is concerned.

Guh.

The oven analogy is fucking profound.

i am not joking we need to force teach cooking in schools. like. it is an essential thing for survival. do you know how easy it is to make things if you know even the bare bones shit about how cooking works. we need to teach teenagers how far you can take an onion and some other veggies it’’s sad that people grow up not knowing how to prepare literally anything. and i’m not talking about oh this home ed class taught me how to make chicken nuggets at home i’m talking about learning the balancing of sweetness and acidity and saltiness and bitterness and shit like that and techniques and oil temperatures and how meats cook. it needs to be taught because it’s literally not even that difficult and it matters so much

i truly believe that knowing how to cook is a basic survival concept and the fact that so many people can’t even make simple dishes is depressing as hell this is the sorta thing that should be taught at a young age. being able to take the ingredients you have around your home and turn them into a meal is like, essential and will make life so much better. you don’t need to be a high end chef you just need to understand some things that can be easily taught… but then again maybe the education system is playing a roll against this and ultimately they want you to grow up to rely on mcdonalds for dinner. i don’t know. please learn how to cook for yourself if you’re able. i’m not asking you to hunt for specific ingredients to make some expensive youtuber’s “best” recipe but if you know the basics of cooking you can do a lot with cheap canned ingredients. cooking can be affordable i promise you just need to learn how to make do with what you can get

Can anyone point me towards resources that teach those basics cus I would LOVE to teach my child this stuff but i dont know how to cook

not comprehensive but heres some:

internet shaquille’s basics but especially:

food safety + a recipe to demonstrate

how to learn to cook (just a list of subtopics, no actual tips)

basics with babish s1 & 2, but particularly:

basic knife skills

picking the right pan for each recipe

j. kenji lopez-alt’s tips and tricks playlist

egg recipes

a little more complicated, involved, and longer than any of the rest of these but good breakdown of flavor & how and why to use the basic seasoning/flavor profiles

and then recipe channels representing various cuisines:

again definitely not a comprehensive list but it touches on most of the basics

not to get political but im begging you guys to stop coming to hawaii. in maui theyre asking to put a ‘pause’ on flights bc we literally do not have enough room or staff to service you. the roads are so full that its causing a major backup when ppl need to get to work.

on top of this, i heard that by September? theyre expecting to get rid of the mask rule (if 70% of ppl are vaccinated/all goes well) but ill be honest w/ you, i know many locals arent getting the vaccine and i know plenty of tourist arent gonna take the necessary precautions.

homeless hawaiians aren’t even allowed to sit or lay on sidewalks to keep up the “paradise” image for tourists

PLEASE stop vacationing in / moving to the occupied Kingdom of Hawaiʻi. You are actively participating in violent settler colonialism when you do, even if you aren’t white. Never in my whole life have I seen our airport THIS packed!!! Our islands cannot support this many people – especially during our dry season and in the middle of a PANDEMIC!

Tourism makes it impossible to keep up with the rising cost of living. It brings in revenue and with that, becomes the fake state’s priority. Tourism pushes native Hawaiians from their land and homes, puts locals at risk for covid19, directly harms the delicate environment and native species here, houseless folk (many whom are native Hawaiian) are being illegally swept to make room for tourists at beaches, and locals are being restricted and fined for using water on east Maui, all while hotels can use up all the resources no problem and our government approves a million dollar home construction for new part-time residents (when locals who have been here for generations are being thrown into poverty, barely staying afloat, losing businesses and even their homes). “Hawai’i has become the Blood Diamond of the Pacific. We are mined for our splendor, and our residents live the every day, complex consequences.” 

It’s absolutely VILE what is happening here. I hope yall know that Hawaiʻi was overthrown and occupied by the US military, and isn’t even legally a state! Hawaiʻi is not your vacation spot, so you better tell your family and friends to stay at home.

Here is a linktree by my friend with petitions to protect sacred, native Hawaiian land on Kauaʻi and Molokaʻi. Sign them.

Here are a few Kānaka Maoli (native Hawaiian) folk in need you can donate to (if you know more please add to my thread!)

Random mansion generator

The Procgen Mansion Generator produces large three-dee dwellings to toy with your imagination, offering various architectural styles and other options. Each mansion even comes with floorplans:

https://boingboing.net/2019/07/12/random-mansion-generator.html

Oooooh! Saving this

That’s fun

Hey, but don’t fall asleep on this Medieval Fantasy City Generator   

Reblogging for the last!

NEAT.

why did you spell 3D like that

[ID: tweet thread by @ neurowonderful:

The five neurodivergent love languages: infodumping, parallel play, support swapping, Please Crush My Soul Back Into My Body, and "I found this cool rock/button/leaf/etc and thought you would like it"

Cause some have been asking:

Infodumping: talking about an interest or passion of yours and thus sharing information, usually in detail and at length

Parallel play: some people call this being alone together, as in when you're both reading your own books in the same room, or one person is doing a puzzle while another plays a video game, etc. Just existing together counts too.

Support swapping: I don't know if this is a widely used term. I used it to mean when ND people accomodate or support each other, like if I remind a friend hydrate and they ask me if I've taken my meds, or a friend helps me write an email and later I help them with homework, etc

Please Crush My Soul Back Into My Body: deep pressure input good!! Provides proprioceptive input and can soothe body stress responses (always get consent)

I found this cool rock/button/leaf etc and thought you would like it: unconventional gift giving, sharing things that are valuable or interesting to you as a sign of affection, OR giving someone a thing you know they are interested in (sure, memes count)

And of course this is just a funny tweet, not a true guide, and there are an infinite number of ways to give and receive love. Feel free to add on your personal neurodivergent love languages :)

/end description]

I don’t know where this is from, but I found it in a thread on Facebook and I am CRYING

Glad to see this is getting notes again now that it’s April.

Remember friends, Autism Speaks is a corrupt organization that does not speak for autistic people!

Transgender Day of Visibility.

In case anyone is having a bad night:

Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found

Here are some fun sites

Here is a master post of Adventure Time episodes and comics

Here is a master post of movies including Disney and Studio Ghibli

Here is a master post of other master posts to TV shows and movies

*tucks you in with fuzzy blanket* *pats your head*

You’ll be okay, friend <3

i will reblog this everytime it shows up because any of my followers could have a bad night right now

All these links, besides the first, are broken. So here’s some more.

Here’s an emergency compliment

Here you can play 2048

Here’s a playlist of Bob ross

Here’s a website to watch movie’s and shows for free

Here’s a website to watch documentaries for free

Here you can to nothing for two minutes

Here you can break something. It’s good for anger

Here’s a button to press to make everything okay

Here’s a site to cut something up (TRIGGER WARNING)

Here’s a site that makes you a website depending on a song you choose

Here’s a gay comic. It’s adorable

Here you can spend Bill Gate’s money

Here you can draw your own island

Here you can learn about patterns website’s use

Here you can get your life stats

Here you can listen to the Tucker Zone (Headphones needed)

Here you can see how fast you’re moving

Here you can see the progress of time

Here you can see the future of the universe 

Want some more? 

Here’s the butterfly project

Here’s a snickerdoodle mug cake

Here’s a link to some free audiobooks

Here’s something to read when you feel like a burden

Here’s a secret

Here’s my playlist of some sea shanties 

Here’s another secret

Here’s a link to some cool websites 

Here’s a blog that gives you recipes for when you’re low on spoons

Here’s some Brony Headcanon’s

Some more? I’ve got plenty

Here’s 100,000 stars

Here you can control the weather (TW FLASHING IMAGES)

Here you can weave silk

Here you can make a castle of your own

Here you can make a kaleidoscope drawing

Here you can explore recursion

Here you can play a jelly block game

I’m back with some more! 

Here you can draw with pasta

Here you can draw logo’s from memory

Here you can play this is sand, here you draw cool sand designs

Here you can play The Organ Trail

Here’s a customizable white noise website

Here you can simulate gravity

Here you can create your own guardian of the galaxy

Here you can make your own galaxy

Here’s a website you can get some support at.

to find later

losing a friend (for the one that got away) 1/3

part 2

@frenchtoastlesbian on tumblr // pinterest personalmessage.blogspot.com // @linguinereid on tumblr // trista mateer // from pinterest // richard siken // ocean vuong “on earth we’re briefly gorgeous”// from pinterest // from pinterest

I reblogged this last month, tagged it, and said “might as well see if it works.” I used this video as a reference to find all the forms that i needed (which is A LOT, especially if you’re a dependent) and sent them through the mail, not really allowing myself to hope.

dude.

$2,714 of medical debt from my top surgery - gone. im shaking this was such a weight on me for 2 years and it fucking worked. what the fuck.

it’s the 21st day of the 21st year of the 21st century.

you can only reblog this today.

Download and learn more about the app here.

BOOST THE FUCK OUT OF THIS

This is so fucking amazing!

Some solutions may seem so small but this is a greater impact.

BOOST THE FUCK OUT OF THIS GUYS

@yenneferofvengerbergg Look, Darling, maybe this will help you understand the importance of the matter.

IMPORTANT NOTE: the app link in the article is for the California one.

There’s one for every state.

[Edit: nope. There’s not one for every state.]

States with apps: California, Pennsylvania, Oregon, Michigan, North Carolina, Virginia, Georgia, New Jersey, Colorado, Missouri, Minnesota, Arizona, Maryland, Oklahoma, Mississippi, New Mexico, DC, Nebraska

Reblogging because it’s still a greaaaat idea.

I’m not in a state with one but boosting this anyways

normalize not celebrating xmas. like every single piece of media involving xmas in any way shape or form has everyone celebrating it like no matter their religion they just like do it for the spirit or the holiday or whatever and if they originally don't it ends w them giving in out of consideration and being guilted. like if you love xmas, that's great. i love bubble tea and i love rosh hashanah, but i don't expect everyone to love them or even experience them. it's not sad for me if someone doesn't enjoy them bc i'm not a self obsessed prick who assumes everyone else enjoys and celebrates the same things i do. pls be respectful this year, pls acknowledge xmas IS NOT a secular holiday, please do not other and exclude those who do not celebrate it. and btw this goes beyond inclusive language.

(goyim and christians/atheists can rb and add if you want but do not clown i am begging you)