I'm so fond of this cast, they're all so silly

His cage is rattled. (Thinking about horses.)

I feel like Silas will be hardest to draw maybe? Idk, I'm playing around with it.

the feature i really need tumblr to add is to have your moms phone number on your profile so if you disagree with me i call your mom to tattle on you but then your mom and i get to talking and we realize we actually have a lot in common then at the same time we say “maybe we should continue this conversation over dinner” then we both laugh and that night your mom and i meet for dinner and i bring her flowers and pay for her food and we have a beautiful evening together that leads into an even more beautiful night on a beach under the stars and i turn to your mom and say “i know this may seem a little fast but i’ve never felt this way before” and she says “i was thinking the same thing” and we kiss under the moonlight and we realize in that moment that we want to spend the rest of our lives together so i move in with her and fall in love more every day and we grow old together and she passes before i do but luckily i’ve come to think of her children like they’re my own then years later i’m on my death bed and you say “you were like a second mother to me” and i say “hey remember when you disagreed with me online 50 years ago well L + ratio + i fucked your mom LOL” then i die having got the last word in

You made very understanding friends online and they invited you to go camping. At sundown, you all reveal your true forms, you heard the horrifying sound of breaking bone and tearing skins as you friends transformed into 8ft tall werewolves, who are very confused about the fursuit you unpacked.

pov you're about to board the most chaotic ship of ancient greece

if you got like a 100kilo bag of glitter and opened it up and left it in the path of like a tornado i think that would be interesting. i dont care abt ecological damage btw

I do. 100kg bag of seaweed based glitter.

i dont. 100kg bag of enriched uranium based glitter

wait isnt uranium denser than lead how heavy would a 100kg bag of uranium be

thyrell.

just kill me

On how a video game about fucking a bear interrupted furry discourse

People don’t realize the absolute comedy that just went through Furry social media.

See, feral smut (i.e. smut of four-legged characters who otherwise satisfy the Harkness test) has always been a contentious subject in the furry fandom, due to how easily it leads to unwarranted real-life accusations of zoophilia. It’s an annoying bit of discourse that has been rearing its head every other year since the modern fandom began four decades ago.

Which, you know, pretty rich, coming from the fandom where a pretty large percentage readily admit to having had some form of sexual awakening over the TLK and MLP:FiM franchises.

And anyway, that discourse was exactly what was going on last week. People getting harassed on Twitter, as an extension of the whole “groomer” moral panic. A lot of fandom relative newcomers parroting arguments right out of the Burned Furs movement (a late 1990s/early 2000s movement dedicated to “purifying” the furry fandom from “perversion” and “degeneracy”).

And then, just as the discourse was at its most heated, Baldur’s Gate 3 entered the chat.

Suddenly, everyone was talking about the game that will let you fuck a bear. Yes, a bear, as in Ursus arctos. A Druid shapeshifted into a bear, to be fair (again: the Harkness test), but a bear nonetheless.

And mainstream media erupted with reports that the game’s sales skyrocketed based on that scene alone.

And the discourse suddenly screeched to a hilariously embarrassed halt.

10/10 comedic timing, no notes.

Let! That! Baby! Eat!!!!!!

Perfect tags

Now that I've finished them I'm curious about the general consensus, and if anyone wanted to share their reasoning I'd love to read that too.

Tumblr is unique bc like. It's collaborative shitposting and you can't opt in or out. You can just say something about your day then an evil wizard shows up to turn your post into something humorous

Every other site is just one and done, but here a post is a welcome mat to be funnier than you

yeah or sometimes you’ll see a post that hacks into your brain and forever rewrites your instinctual reaction to seeing a pineapple explode

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

26/26

Y'all have got to stop spreading fake news via the destiel meme, that shit needs to be an accredited source

shaun has a Realisation™ about Des thanks to Elijah's existence

I love the specific ways in which AI is terrible

can’t think of a worse feeling than coming up with a really great meme, like, 2 months after the image format dies

You cannot possibly guess where this is going

I ain't even ashamed how many times I watched this.

Lmao this is the content I am here for.

I think tumblr would like this one

love how tumblr staff has time to censor words like “paint mixing” and “my face” and yet they can’t get rid of ssexsophie8127 thats been liking my posts from 2017

fuck you

i won