“GIVE IT SEVEN YEARS AND HE’LL BE GIVING YOU JUST THAT.”

I tried to scroll past this. I really did.

everyone needs to watch this video before they log off tonight

well, now I know what I’m doing every time a car alarm goes off

this looks like so much fun

What’s the word for horny but not in a sexual way like I’m horny for Halloween but I don’t wanna fuck a pumpkin you feel

do u mean excited

every woman on tumblr should have this on their dash

And every man

Look how nobody’s yelling or arguing or making things into a competition. Look how this is to straight up educate people through a different perspective. Look how effective that makes the message.

sometimes i’ll have loads of money and then other times i’ll be awake

I can help who’s next

my mom is a role model

+

50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”

Yet another Australian in LA. Where’s the Vegemite? 

when you love a song but you listened to it a lot during a really bad time in your life so it reminds you of bad times

Excuse me but what is this doing in the potato tag

that does not look like a fucking potato to me

why were you in the potato tag

READ TO FILTH