Country homes
Take my roads
To belong
Where I'M A PLACE
Western mama
Mount Virginia
Take my roads, country home
my friend asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend because her parents are homophobic af but they ended up hating me so much that they were glad when she said she was gay task failed successfully
okay so
- be a goth. conservative christian parents don't approve of goth men. show up to their house wearing all kinds of satanic symbols if you can
- know more about religion than the parents. they'll try to introduce you to christianity because you don't exactly look like a christian but your dad's an ex priest and has a phd in theology so *cracks knuckles* you'll correct them on every little mistake they make
- call your fake girlfriend every annoying petname under the sun. i'm talking about babu, shmoopie, snuffleupagus. when you run out of annoying english terms of endearment call her shit like "my liver" or "my little cabbage" (actual greek terms of endearments but the parents won't know this they'll just think you're annoying :3)
- to continue this, talk to your fake girlfriend in the most high pitched annoying voice possible but talk in your regular voice to everyone else
stare at her older brother's ass for just a little too long- have an annoying laugh. think of sybil fawlty but a stereotypical villain playing a church organ in his castle
- let them quote bible verses to you. then ask "so when were those two destroyed for sodomy?". it's very funny to do this when judas kisses jesus, and it's even funnier when you've just corrected them over a minor mistake in church history
- ask WHY abraham was begging for sodom. it doesn't make sense to you why a good christian man would go and beg for tha-
- be over possessive of your fake gf (dont really do this, it's just an act)
go and fuck her brother in an alleyway.the parents won't know about this so it's an optional step- use words no one knows the meaning of. do this without realising because you always talk like that
- just be yourself! that's enough on its own to make them despise you tbh
yes
i kissed him on the lips infront of his parents and claimed it was the usual greek greeting between men is that enough for you
Are you…. Are you secretly dating her brother OP?
yes
I wonder why
Show up again to admit to dating the brother, but dress like a typical suburbanite and act like you've never met the parents before. Absolute power move.
asdgfgsjfh im totally doing this
want an update?
ofc you do
but i'm too tired to write all of what happened down right now so instead try to imagine the most awkward situation you've ever been in.
now multiply the awkwardness by 100
first of all i'm just gonna show the difference in what i was wearing
an example of what i would wear as my friend's fake bf:
and as my boyfriend's actual bf:
when my bf and i showed up his dad did such a double take
sooo yeah my bf told his parents he's gay, they looked surprised but told him it was fine... then they shared a look of pure horror (seriously, it was like they had just found out they're in the matrix) and said
"and uh. why is...he here?"
i went and introduced myself like we had never met before and said i was their son's boyfriend
:3
i've never seen two people look more angry before but they weren't gonna say anything because they had other family members over
the family members who had never met me before and therefore knew nothing about the fake relationship thing started asking me what faith i am. i said i was raised protestant, though i'm not very religious now, but that's something i want to change. i had never mentioned anything about being a protestant before and i had said several times that my family was greek orthodox but gaslight gatekeep girlboss
aaaand then the awkwardness began. those were probably the most awkward minutes of my life (we didn't stay for long because i thought the dad was gonna hit me [he probably was. i saw him clenching his fists several times]) and i don't think anyone has ever looked at me with such murderous intent as my bf's parents
update two electric boogaloo ig
i have a girlfriend now🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
The comments on the video crack me up 😂
this is so sad… look what evolution has done. why? why did horses have to get big
ssjgssjgoku
They are still growing
prikle
the first horse…….. was human
There you go!
A perfect time to bring this back:
their names are cpu and graphics card and hard drive and usb port
Margot Robbie Looks for 'Barbie' press tour // Styling based from original Barbie dolls by Andrew Mukamal
Anonymous asked:
PLEASE can we see your Waru-Peach interpretation????? PLEAAASEEEEE??????
ive absolutely thought about drawing it before and now y'all are making me want to
Baby Clifford & baby Snoopy
it was just a misunderstanding
post-timeskip
jane fonda got arrested the third week in a row at climate change protests. this time with ted danson
femjunky
Legends only
transrat-boy
For everyone complaining about how these two can get arrested and it won’t affect their careers, you’re right. It most likely won’t hurt their careers. That’s why they keep going out and doing it. They’re using their platform to their advantage. They’re both white, of an older generation, and famous enough to be recognized. They’re holding their generation accountable and making an effort to show up and enforce change. This isn’t them advertising a TV show or some bs, they’re there to help
This is a very good way to use your privilege.
Jane Fonda has been involved in protest since the America Vietnam war
Jane Fonda’s activism did, in fact, hurt her career, and she’s out there risking it all again. She wasn’t just involved in protest since the Vietnam war (tho that is what did her career the most damage, some lawmakers were actually calling for her to be tried for treason over it)
She was already under government surveillance before that for her support of the Black Panthers and her show of solidarity with two separate first nations re-occupations (Fort Lawton and Alcatraz).
She’s not being silly or doing a bit or pulling a PR stunt. She’s just not letting the cops scare her. Because this is far from her first rodeo.
Jane Fonda’s mugshot from Nov. 3, 1970.
She was arrested on trumped-up drug smuggling charges, which an officer later admitted was their only way of booking her because god damn Nixon wanted her arrested for her anti-Vietnam War activism. The FBI and the CIA, and the NSA had been surveilling her for months without her knowledge.
If there is any celebrity whose activism is not empty lip service, it’s Jane fucking Fonda.
I keep having to tear down extremely predatory/misleading Scien.tology flyers in my school's art building. This is the third fucking time I've ripped the fuckers up and I'm getting Real Fucking Tired of it.
If you see shit like this DO NOT call the number, do not do anything to interact with these fucking people. Take down the posters if you're able to. They do NOT want to help you. They are a literal fucking cult who openly despise psychology and any actual proven mental health science, and are actively trying to trick mentally/emotionally vulnerable people into joining.
The red flags here are "Hubbard," the name of their founder, and "dianetics," the crackpot theory they teach for "auditing" your sins from your past lives.
I’d like to add what @jaspertheshark said in the tags because I feel it’s important
