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happy big & sexually normal

@officialspec / officialspec.tumblr.com

spec/21/artist (allegedly) he/him pronouns // patreon //
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softly opening comms for summer even tho i have classes on rn bc i need a new drawing tablet for schoolll anywayz

  • email me at officialspeccommissions@gmail.com
  • send me your paypal email, commission details, references and any other specifics you want me to add (pose/expression, lighting conditions, etc). the more information the better!
  • invoices are paid in 2 parts (50% deposit before starting and 50% after final approval)
  • prices are in USD and you MUST have image references. description only will be rejected. hopefully i can open up actual char design comms at some point but not today

i dont have a lot of free time atm so please be patient !!! ill finish as soon as i can. thank u

#commissions#commission info#commissions open#ive been having a lot of fun drawing silly little guys recently so theyre on here too#my art#<- for perusal
trainwreckgenerator
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ursawood

I love my fath– I’m so big what the fuck. So naturally I chab-, challenged his murderer to a 𝒹𝓊𝑒𝓁. I failed. The six-fingered man left me alive! …but he gave me these. How old were you? Ffive years old. When I was strong enough, I dedicated my life to the study of ᶠʳᵉⁿᶜʰ… Fencing. So the next time we beet, I-I will not fall… fail. I will go up to the six-fingered man and say! 𝓗𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓸. My name is Indigo MontoyyyyyyA….?? You k- you killed my father. Prepare to die, heh.

manywinged
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licensehaver

bro my dad “went to dinner” at my favorite mexican restaraunt and said he’d bring me home a burrito and it’s fucking 9pm

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licensehaver

my dad is having an affair

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licensehaver

dad brought me the promised burrito just now so here’s my obligatory post exonerating him from infedelity

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licensehaver

that burrito was fantastic. i’m inclined to think my dad has never had sex in his life

trainwreckgenerator
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glitchdollmemoria

i loooove love love gender as a bizarre performance art type of deal. bioessentialism is so BORING exclusionism is BORING "he/him is for men she/her is for women they/them is for nonbinaries" GAG ME. im here to be weird and sexy. im here to confuse everyone. im here to freak out the people in charge. and im here to be sexy again

femslashandpoly
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beaft

allow me to tell you of the grave error i made yesterday. it was 8pm. i was cooking moroccan stew. needed to let it simmer for 25 minutes before i added the chickpeas. i shall go upstairs, thought i, and take a shower, and leave the chickpeas on the counter to drain. puddles the cat is sleeping near the stove. i briefly consider locking her out of the kitchen - but surely even she, leviathan of unconquerable appetites, will not concern herself with hard, drained, uncooked chickpeas. surely not.

with this set-up in mind, what do you imagine i found when i came back downstairs?

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beaft

i'll not keep you in suspense.

the moral of this story is never own cats

manywinged
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evilscientist3

steps into a big pot of bubbling oil and sits there like its a hot tub and i snile at you so nicely that you step in after me and youre immediately boiled til theres nothing left

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evilscientist3

well you see,

the sniler

jsup
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mortalityplays

2023: missives from desktop tumblr suggest that per the latest update my mutuals are being hunted by some kind of grotesque clown. staff assure us this is driven by user feedback.