I CANT BREATHE

WUKH WUKH WUKH LIPSTICK IN MY VALENTINO WHITE BAG ???!

What moms are like when guests are about to be coming over…

@kingduck303

When My Uncle, who’s completely deaf, was about 17, he got in a heated argument with my great aunt, his mother.  They were furiously signing back and forth.  Suddenly they both stopped and started laughing and laughing.  My great aunt had accidentally signed, “Don’t you yell at me.”

If I witnessed that Bruh omg 😭😭😭😭😭😭

“Use your inside hands!”

USE YOUR INSIDE HANDS IM

when prepubescent kids make fun of your acne

same

I can’t stop thinking about this video it’s haunting me ,,,

i was expecting “fuck tha police” or “damn it feels good to be a gangster” not some shitty kazoo version of “the final countdown”

Today Is National Take Your Dog To Work Day.

RELEASE YOUR INHIBITION

FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN! 

NO ONE ELSE CAN FEEL IT FOR YOU!

NO ONE ELSE CAN LET IT IN!

my stomach hurts

Ive passed this video so many times and this time I finally watched it. Im really glad I did

I have stared into the abyss and it gave me a thumbs up

[Person behind camera: (sobbing incoherently with laughter) it’s so…. ffffunnny…. ohheheheheh…. (sniffing, snorting, laughing) of all the shit you can find…. So this, this dates back to 19– (sniff) 1999, as you can see up there. (sniffs, laughs) “The Life Sized Satanic Doll Serves as Masturbation Toy for America’s Youth” This is, like, a Baptist website – (cracks up, giggles, snorts) ssfsfsfsfsfssss–stupidest thing… ever seen. So! (sniffs, calms down a little) So, w-what kind of doll was this child … masturbating to? (person scrolls down to picture of Jar Jar Binks, BURSTS INTO UNCONTROLLABLE WHEEZING LAUGHTER, SNORTS, WEEPS WITH LAUGHTER) Aah……oh my god…. aAHAHAHAHAHa….. HAHAHAHAHA….ohmygod…..]

It’s times like this I’m grateful for the people that caption videos.

@hughjackass

@bennygal16

flamingos really piss me off like what the hell are they doing??????

lookin 4 tha party

Oh. My. Damn.

He did this……in J E A N S

He didn’t even look at the fucking rim…

Honestly fuck those photos where someone’s room has like one white blanket on the ground next to a plant with like two pastel sweaters on a clothes rack. Welcome to my cluttered hellscape of a bedroom. There are no clean walls. Clothes are erupting from every crevice. My bed has 14 pillows and none of the pillowcases match. Where the hell is my representation on this damn website.

Nom.