Ithan's inner monologue

does anyone wanna talk about classic literature (the early 2000s YA spy series gallagher girls by ally carter)

ENTRY LEVEL MEANS NO EXPERIENCE. IT MEANS NO PORTFOLIO OF RELEVANT SAMPLES. ENTRY LEVEL IS ENTRY LEVEL

Ember in the BAM bonus chapter

What are you doing January 30th?

Me:

Tharion Ketos and Ithan Holstrom share a single brain cell, but neither of them has it. Who knows where it is? Not them, that’s for sure.

This is actually a really good way to do the pay it forward thing. I hope this iteration catches on

I wish I could make cats understand the concept of fairness. Of hypocrisy. I wish next time Beatrice was eating I could stick my hand in her bowl and dig around and say "see? Not very nice is it?" And she would say "I understand now father you're right". But instead? Big fat paw in my soup

having a uterus SUCKS man bc all day you'll be feeling the "hey bestie check your pants 😃 check it right now 😃 you might be getting your period 😃 hey bestie i think youre bleeding 😃" and then when you check if you got your period and your body is like WRONG ❌️ its The Slime

all the cooter carriers know The Slime

this is a hit with the slimers

can anyone tell me why i enter the grocery store a normal person and emerge as some sort of vile ravening monster

you are all. correct.

that gender bent sunny verse. a bunch of washed up annoying women isolated from the rest of society and their token bottle blond metrosexual twink they all make fun of. lesbian mac. peaked in high school sorority girl dennis. cranky old con woman frank. charlie being basically exactly the same. i’m seeing the vision i get it

stomach hurts from hunger. stomach hurts from eating. what the hell do yuou want from me you stupid fucking organ

I'm sure it was confusing to have the overtly anti-right wing song off the anti-right wing album altered to target maga. I cannot imagine how shocking it was to find out that the avowedly socialist and openly bisexual punk rock kid who's written songs about distrusting the government since he was four, is an anti-fascist.

Brave little kitty

i wish ads felt pain when you skipped them

about twice a year my partner will want to use my toothbrush and then get disgruntled when i call him a vile beast.

You are microwave safe. You are dishwasher safe. You will not turn orange after one use. You will not deform under boiling water.