i had three fic ideas.  wrote one.  i still have three fic ideas.  this is not how math is supposed to work.

can this post please back up it’s too close to home

I had five ideas, I wrote two, now I have seven

Listen. They’re called “plot bunnies” for a reason, and it’s not just because they hop around all over your brain demanding attention.

🎶99 fanfic ideas on my blog

99 fanfic ideas~

Take one down, pass it around

137 fanfic ideas on my blog🎶

this post walked into my house and kicked in my ribs

this post stole my kneecaps

i’m really sorry to all the people who have been physically maimed by this post

sir thats my emotional support long haired male character

“Our sweet rescue baby Ruby Jane, comforting one of my foster kitties as he’s getting a bath❤️ It’s the sweetest. Enjoy!“

Video/caption by Stephanie Vice - SPCA Florida

This changed my life

i am full on crying

A Masterlist of Exophilia Creators

(Most Recent Update as of 8/03/20)

This is essentially a list of other creators’ masterlists, mostly so I can find them myself without having to dig. If you are a monster writer, artist, or blogger and didn’t see yourself listed, or there’s a blog that should be on my masterlist and isn’t, please don’t hesitate to send me a message and/or reblog and tag me. I want to include all of you.

I have a zero tolerance policy for non-con, incest, bestiality, and pedophilia, so please keep that in mind.

The OkCryptid Collab Masterlist

Great Writers without Masterlist: @your-monster-romance, @pixieungerstories, @thetravelerwrites-sfw, @shekissesturians, @monsternewbie, @orc-lady-unabi, @bestiarybabes, @teratorequests, @ladyccr, @monsterboyfriendwritings, @monstrous-suggestion, @echoesoffantasy, @teratotypist, @monsters-significant-other-main, @baras-before-bros, @monstersmuch, @monstalove, @randomnightlord, @sultrysirens, @monsterkinkmeme, @hoodoo12, @lumberingleviathan, @terato-is-life, @7h3hy8r1d, @themonsterpeddler

Amazing Exophilia Artists: @lurluu, @relay314, @celestialkiri, @ijessbest, @mikaosart, @gritpen, @bloodsugardaddy, @fdevitart, @koalamb, @leftski-art, @niuniente, @thefuzzycomic, @demonsanctuarycomic @niuart, @lady-dysnomia, @maunderfiend, sharks, @temixart, @temixartsfw, @artghst, @ghoulpetal, @snejkha, @meredithmcclaren, @skelletus, @charminglyantiquated, @kehleryn, @k-worsham-art, @takamatsu-kun, @trash-can-art, @terotica, @iingezo, @edarow, @oddacle, @abigaillarson, @undergroundwubwubmaster, @wt-art, @fangs-fangs-fangs, @monstertwix, @terateratophiliac, @creaturacarissime, @escendoll, @morticia-butler-art, @ilustrariane, @orcgirlart, @rofax, @kirmalight, @stutterhug

Exophilia Appreciation Blogs: @dateamonter, @cocolovesorcs, @teratofreak, @yourheartmonstersden, @infinitemonsterlove, @crypticdatesuggestions, @monstermebaby, @advanced-teratophilia, @always-a-slut-for-dragons, @monsterboyfriendcatalogue, @monster-fuxker, @lesbian-monsters, @demon-under-your-bed, @nsfwren-reader, @sleepymonstrosities, @sleepynsfwmonstrosities, @maidenofmonsters, @fuck-yeah-monsters-and-villains, @frozen-monster-lover, @monster–boyfriend, @whenmonstersloves, @making-monsters-happy, @beastlykisses, @stagglr, @demonunderyourbedsworld, @monsters-and-music, @malelovingmonsters, @aelia-likes-stories, @cozylibrarycorner, @thetravelerreads​, @softmonsterboys

Guide to Figuring out the Age of an Undated World Map.

No but take the time to actually read it because I lost like 15 minutes.

I have a friend who is really good at this type of thing.  He once found an old globe at a garage sale and he was able to pin the date of it’s making down to like a 6 month window, because it only would’ve been correct during a specific point in WWII.  

I was mad impressed, because I have no mind for geography.  I can barely remember my own state’s capitol.

THIS IS GOLD 😂😂😂

This is amazing. Take the time to actually read it.

Holy shit the super specific things towards the end

I didn’t know anything about the giant lake in California being created by accident?!

I love how it differentiates the maps of Narnia based on which book you’re looking at

I almost scrolled past this

As a Resident of Colorado, I applaud Mr. Monroe of XKCD for his foresight in seeing the late 2020 Uprising of the Brown Sugar Mill Radioactive Brown Recluse Spider Colony. 

Concept: an apocalyptic or post apocalyptic tv show centred on a group of disabled protagonists

Must include:

-enough details about how they survive that no one can call it “unrealistic”

-mental and physical disabilities 

-a character who isn’t necessarily contributing to the survival of the group, but is not abandoned or looked down upon

-at least one character whose disability is actually less of a problem for them now that the world is ending/ended (example: autistic character who used to be constantly overstimulated but no longer is)

Optional features:

-abled person says “the only disability in life is a bad attitude” and gets told where to stuff it

-creatively weaponized mobility aids/assistive devices

-character who abled people think isn’t worth helping because of their disability, but actually has at least one skill essential to the survival of the group

-every time an abled person says something ignorant, all present disabled people look into the camera like they’re on the office 

- character who only survived the initial apocalyptic event because they had an assistive device  which just so happened in that one circumstance to give them an advantage over everyone else

-the abled camp wearing rags and eating meat on sticks cooked over a crude fire. pans over to our heroes and they have perfect clothes, a variety of food and also music.

“what? how did you do that?” “well, jane’s special interest is the medieval production of cloth and, like 8 of us can sew. Turns out those of us who can’t go out much develop a LOT of hobbies.”

A character who scares everyone when a zombie bites them but literally every one of their limbs are amputated.

“They…. they bit Gina.”

*Gina pulls of prosthetic arm* “It’s ok guys! They just got my decoy.”

(vibrates at the speed of sound) 

I love this a normal amount

Defying Doomsday is an anthology of apocalypse fiction featuring disabled and chronically ill protagonists, proving it’s not always the “fittest” who survive – it’s the most tenacious, stubborn, enduring and innovative characters who have the best chance of adapting when everything is lost. In stories of fear, hope and survival, this anthology gives new perspectives on the end of the world, from authors Corinne Duyvis, Janet Edwards, Seanan McGuire, Tansy Rayner Roberts, Stephanie Gunn, Elinor Caiman Sands, Rivqa Rafael, Bogi Takács, John Chu, Maree Kimberley, Octavia Cade, Lauren E Mitchell, Thoraiya Dyer, Samantha Rich, and K L Evangelista.

*reblogs this version again in case you haven’t seen it*

im very grateful for the lessons in photography i was taught in stop motion class because just now they made it possible to photograph the stars with my phone in spite of the camera usually not detecting the light of stars because theyre so dim,,,, enjoy these shiny motherfuckers

ok so if everythings normal, your phone camera should have a manual mode (sometimes called pro mode). in it, change the settings of the shutter lag to 20 seconds, then put the phone down on some stable, plane surface and press the photo button (usually when using your camera, the volume buttons can be used as photo button) and let the phone still for the whole 20 seconds. 

(basically the problem with most cameras is that they dont have a very good light sensitivity in the dark, however that doesnt mean they cant detect it at all. the longer the shutter is open, the more light your camera takes in and the more burnt/light your pic will be, so in (literally) dark situations, make the shutter lag longer to get all that light you need! also i said 20 seconds but really you can make it shorter or longer depending on what kinda stuff you want for your stars)

Yes this!

Additionally, adjust your ISO to the highest number (mimics the film used for very low light and low speed images)

And set your shutter speed to the longest time possible (on my phone it’s 10 seconds).

Leave your focus settings on Auto, and if your phone camera has a timer option, turn that on (five seconds is generally enough).

Plan your shot first, then find a place to set your phone down so you can get the image you want. The less light pollution, the better; you’ll pick up FAR more stars in your picture.

Once you know what you want to shoot, tap your screen to “focus” it, then hit the button to take the picture, set your phone down, and back away from the “tripod”. Don’t touch your phone for a good 15 seconds, just to be sure.

You will not be disappointed in the results, let me assure you.

Not even a little bit.

@tamberland

THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING I’VE EVER LEARNED

This also works very well if you want to photograph the Northern Lights, especially if you have a tripod (since you shouldn’t move it). Below is a pic a friend took with the ISO 800 and shutter speed 10 secs.

i think i speak for a lot of us when i say HOLY SHIT and THANK YOU 

So apparently last year the National Park Service in the US dropped an over 1200 page study of LGBTQ American History as part of their Who We Are program which includes studies on African-American history, Latino history, and Indigenous history. 

Like. This is awesome. But also it feels very surreal that maybe one of the most comprehensive examinations of LGBTQ history in America (it covers sports! art! race! historical sites! health! cities!) was just casually done by the parks service. 

This is really great??

We used it in my LGBT history class and it’s SO WONDERFUL I LOVE it PLEASE READ at least some chapters. It has photos and sources and goes into detail in footnotes when it doesn’t have time for a tangent.

its saturday rb saturday shorts [yt]

is this Polygon Castlevania monsterfucker Zelda canon timeline read-every-book-in-Skyrim guy?

yeah

You can reblog Saturday shorts every day of the week if you’re gay enough

how to draw arms ? ? 

holy fuck

holy fuck is right… but… does it work with legs???

yes !!

but how much extend

^^^^^^^^^^

I NEARLY CHOKED

ENJFDFNFATFVFDF

finally. i can be accurate

This is too fucking great to not reblog

I give it MASCLES

BIG MACHO

LMAOOOOOO

Okay but for anyone who legit wants to know how to calculate it correctly:

The elbow joint on average rests a couple inches higher than the navel, so if you measure how long the distance is from the middle of the shoulder to that point then you have the length of the upper and fore arms!

So if anyone’s wondering about legs too, the simplest rule of thumb is that the length from the top of the leg to the knee is equal to the distance between the top of the leg and the bottom of the pectorals:

And I wanna stress that when i say “top of the leg” i’m not talking about the crotch (please don’t flag me tumblr it’s an anatomical term) i’m talking about the point where the femur connects to the pelvis, which is higher up on the hips:

It’s easier to see what I’m talking about in this photo of a man squatting: 

So yeah if you use that measurement when using this technique you should get fairly realistically proportioned legs:

But remember! messing with proportions is an important and fun part of character design! Know the rules first so you can then break them however you please!

HOW THE HELL DID I FIND THIS POST OMG

Licherally in the midst of drawing a guy and crying at how bad the arms are. Thanks Tumbles

Saving for lāter

Reblogging almost entirely for the ART! pic.

What is dat *aggressively scuttles* 

(via)

“Get off my lawn!”

An elephant casually stealing and then returning a wildlife photographer’s hat 

(Source)

He doesn’t just steal it though. He puts it on his own head. He takes it, tries it on, looks around (I swear like he’s going “Look look I’m a Human! Don’t I look good in my Human head-thing?”) then gives it back. There is so much playful and good-natured intelligence in this one gesture I’m losing my mind here. Elephants are too freaking good for us. 

So, let me guess– you just started a new book, right? And you’re stumped. You have no idea how much an AK47 goes for nowadays. I get ya, cousin. Tough world we live in. A writer’s gotta know, but them NSA hounds are after ya 24/7. I know, cousin, I know. If there was only a way to find out all of this rather edgy information without getting yourself in trouble…

You’re in luck, cousin. I have just the thing for ya.

It’s called Havocscope. It’s got information and prices for all sorts of edgy information. Ever wondered how much cocaine costs by the gram, or how much a kidney sells for, or (worst of all) how much it costs to hire an assassin?

I got your back, cousin. Just head over to Havocscope.

((PS: In case you’re wondering, Havocscope is a database full of information regarding the criminal underworld. The information you will find there has been taken from newspapers and police reports. It’s perfectly legal, no need to worry about the NSA hounds, cousin ;p))

Want more writerly content? Follow maxkirin.tumblr.com!

Assassins

“Below are selected prices that are paid to professional assassins by criminal organizations and drug cartels for a contract hit.

In Australia, the median price to hire a hit man is $13,610 (9,800 Euros), with the price going up to $83,000 (60,000 Euros) based on the task.

In Mexico, the cost for a low level assassin is $208 (150 Euros), and up to $20,832 (15,000 Euros) for a higher profile target like a police chief.

The prices paid in Argentina are between $3,749 (2,700 Euros) to $5,555 (4,000 Euros) per hit.

Government statistics in Spain state that 40 assassinations take place each year, with prices for the hit ranging between $27 (20 Euros) to $69,000 (50,000 Euros).”

So cheap! I always thought things like this would cost more than $1 million…

This is super useful to know!

and not just for writing!!

@katherine-rose

HOLY FUCK

HOW MANY HOURS HAVE I WASTED TRYING TO FIND HEROIN PRICES ON THE INTERNET WHAT A GREAT DATABASE

I needed this

Actually useful. Sometimes incognito isn’t enough.

why does crunchyroll exist when kissanime.me is RIGHT there

crunchyroll and every other anime streaming service: *only has a limited selection throughout their show fronts and is annoying*

kissanime.me: yes there are sexy milfs within my area but at least I can watch Dragon Ball Super: Broly

if you're on desktop then download these and you'll be just fine:

-Kiss Anime Essentials

-Ublock Origin

-Ol' Reliable Adblock

If you're on mobile I have a word of advice:

-pray

I just realized if I get arrested cause I teach and publically endorse piracy at least I died like a man; watching Dragon Ball Super: Broly free

actually, since you're just using a streaming site and not hosting it, you've done nothing wrong in the eyes of the law, at least in the us

IM A FREE MAN (for now)

8 vegetables that you can regrow again and again.

Scallions

You can regrow scallions by leaving an inch attached to the roots and place them in a small glass with a little water in a well-lit room.

Garlic

When garlic begins to sprout, you can put them in a glass with a little water and grow garlic sprouts. The sprouts have a mild flavor than garlic and can be added to salads, pasta and other dishes.

Bok Choy

Bok choy can be regrown by placing the root end in water in a well-lit area. In 1-2 weeks , you can transplant it to a pot with soil and grow a full new head.

Carrots

Put carrot tops in a dish with a little water. Set the dish in a well-lit room or a window sill.  You’ll have carrot tops to use in salads. 

Basil

Put clippings from basil with 3 to 4-inch stems in a glass of water and place it in direct sunlight. When the roots are about 2 inches long, plant them in pots to and in time it will grow a full basil plant.

Celery

Cut off the base of the celery and place it in a saucer or shallow bowl of warm water in the sun. Leaves will begin to thicken and grow in the middle of the base, then transfer the celery to soil. 

Romaine Lettuce

Put romaine lettuce stumps in a ½ inch of water. Re-water to keep water level at ½ inch. After a few days, roots and new leaves will appear and you can transplant it into soil.

Cilantro

The stems of cilantro will grown when placed in a glass of water. Once the roots are long enough, plant them in a pot in a well-lit room. You will have a full plant in a few months.

Get your infinite food exploit out of here you cheater. People like you ruin the survival horror experience.

This is what happens when white guys listen to Indian music

holy shit

whenever I’m feeling sad I just watch this video.

I was not expecting that level of choreography or that they would actually know the words.  This is awesome.

was not expecting that handstand jfc

im crying actual tears this is sheer beauty

especially because bc im indian and indian people dance like this as well

they truly captured the essence of our culture im laughing so hard

I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE TUMBLR KNEW THAT THERE IS A PART 2

as an Indian who appreciates this kind of promotion of Daler Mehndi’s “tunak tunak tun”, i have to reblog this

@onemerryjester

Lol these two videos were the classics from years ago. Love to see the throwbacks during times like this:)

he comin’

(via)

Random mansion generator

The Procgen Mansion Generator produces large three-dee dwellings to toy with your imagination, offering various architectural styles and other options. Each mansion even comes with floorplans:

https://boingboing.net/2019/07/12/random-mansion-generator.html

Oooooh! Saving this

That’s fun

Hey, but don’t fall asleep on this Medieval Fantasy City Generator   

If you want the next step up from cities, check out this world map generator!

A random example:

It can also show you the heights of regions of the maps, what kind of biomes you might expect, generate border shifting, upload base maps from images, assign areas where specific cultures or religions are practiced, you can add, move and name every single town in a country, add provinces within the country, generate place names from language databases, shift rivers, change the direction of global wind patterns and see how that effects the climate… There’s a bunch of stuff you can do with it!

modern greek mythology adaptation where hades and persephone are played by john mulaney and his wife

She’s hades, he’s Persephone

Oh no, no. John Mulaney is 100% Hades.

And from what we hear about her, she’s very Persephone.

“So, I meet this wonderful lady. Just fantastic, my heart does that thing where it’s skipping beats, and I - all of you think I’m going to talk about how I suavely asked her out, and that is not what happened. 

“I ride up in my chariot, and the first - this is literally the first thing I say to her is ‘do you want to meet my dog’?

“And this - I - this is a sign that this woman is my soul mate - she looks at her friends hanging around and says, ‘sure, catch you later, guys’.

“I’m going to skip forward here a couple of dates - no, don’t - this is not the story of how my wife met my dog - and her mom - her mom - finds out she’s seeing me. Now I know everyone jokes about how a girl’s dad is this big, hulking - going to hunt you down if you’re dating his daughter and he doesn’t like you. But if you say that, it’s because you’ve never had some girl’s mom glaring up at you from like - her mom’s like two inches taller than her, so this little furious glare from around my chin area, saying her daughter’s not allowed to come see me anymore.

“And this - okay, this is when I knew I was going to marry this girl, she looks at her mom and, cool as anything, says, ‘Too late, mom. I met his dog, ate dinner over here. I’m staying’.”

WAIT…so does that mean….Petunia is Cerberus?