Surfing the web and wiping out cringefailingly

Saw this trend going around and knew Discworld would be a fun one for it. Really wish I could make more and longer poll options.

Other options I considered (all real);

Discworld Heritage Post

I want one of those scenes in a dude bro film where “tomboy” chick has to wear a dress to go undercover or whatever, but instead of the guys drooling as she walks down the stairs, they’re like “k. U need to stop. Go put the cargo pants back on. You look super uncomfortable and awkward in that. Brutus, you go be the fake prostitute.”

I’m just imagining this super ripped guy called Brutus being like ‘YESSS!!! I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE THE FAKE PROSTITUTE!! Now is my time to shine!!’

so I got inspired… and had to make a comic….

*wipes away a single tear* Yes.

Miss Congeniality, but with The Rock instead of Sandra Bullock

He looks so ready. XD

“My time has come.”

Plot twist she’s his bodyguard

I specifically went back through my reblogs to find these

Unironically the biggest death knell I heard for twitter was the fact that, as far as anyone is aware, there are no longer any furries working at twitter.

The rats have fled the sinking ship

The wolves have fled the sinking ship

The dragons have fled the-

I'm not even joking furries account for like 30% of all modern tech infrastructure.

if you c*nsor anything in a post you are l*gally required to put all of the omitted v*wels at the end as a footn*te

*eeoo

Okay th*n. *f you’r* sure about th*s. 

Old Macd*nald had a farm.  

*eieio

i’m going to shatter you like glass

Just heard someone say “30 years ago, in 1993,” and stopped what I was doing. I froze. What do you mean 1993 was 30 years ago. That’s illegal

breaking: lil nas x to rebrand as lil nas twitter

pros of being a human is that i get to play viddy games. cons is everything else

Damn. What a film. Rushed this out in two hours just to feel something

This article documents the severe and ongoing specimen neglect I witnessed over 12 months working at Florida State Collection of Arthropods. FSCA actively solicits donations, then picks and chooses what specimens to care about based on individuals' personal favorites. The rest are left to rot.

Please take a look and consider sharing this, it's extremely important for people (especially in science, taxonomy, natural history, museum curation, etc) to know how and why scientific material is being lost.

Sorry all, I'm extra sad about this today. I keep writing about this situation and deleting it later because I'm still scared they're going to come after me.

I got fired from FSCA not because of my skill as a curator or the amount of effort I put in (I used to come in on weekends for no extra money just because I enjoyed the work, totally honest) but because I complained anonymously on my twitter about head curator Paul Skelley continuing to hang around in my office and try to talk to me after I had told my boss Felipe Soto-Adames MULTIPLE TIMES that Paul made me very uncomfortable. In a moment of weakness, I complained about it to strangers on the internet because my boss refused to do anything to help me out (he has personally confirmed) out of fear of retaliation/firing. While I was working at FSCA my job was basically covering for Paul, fixing the specimens including holotypes that he and others had neglected for longer than I've even been alive. So, yes, having to fix his gross negligence eight hours a day while also having to politely stroke his ego whenever he felt like chatting me up eventually shredded my nerves.

What's extra pathetic is I still miss that job despite everything. I miss curating and having that goal of fixing up the whole wet collection even though I should not have had to do that and I wasn't being treated well at all. I learned afterwards that Paul has gone after other young "troublemaking" employees before me and I am only the most recent target.

FSCA has probably burned all evidence that I ever worked there in a ceremonial fire by now but I still think about the place every day. I moved to my current apartment specifically for that job, and I had promised my boss I would stay there permanently even though the pay was barely enough for me to live. I don't have many job skills. I was just going to stay there and work on my weird shrimp even though there were some jerks around.

I don't know what to end with, I'm just still sad about this and I'm going to be sad for a while.

If you are in biology or natural history, please don't forget about Paul Skelley and all the effort he went through just to get back at me personally because I got frustrated at him one time. My life is considerably harder now because I insisted on sticking up for not only myself but for the other people whose thousands of hours of work have rotted into nothing under his watch. Don't let this guy stay famous for being a great scientist, he is not.

People are asking me how they can help, unfortunately I have limited ideas now. I have let professional organizations know about the situation but I don't hear back. Individual scientists have told me that they share the undark article, and I think that helps. My former coworkers will not speak to me at all so I have no reason to believe anything has happened. I don't know what to do except to try and get more eyes on the story so maybe other scientists or journalists can speak out in a way FSCA will actually take seriously.

Nothing is more important to them than their reputation, and right now they're claiming to be one of the best collections in the world. Here's what the holotypes were marinating in. You tell me if this is "world class"

imagine being a ghost hunter in the 19th century. running around freezing cold spooky old mansions in tight pants and a puffy-sleeved white shirt, cloak streaming out behind you like enormous bat wings, knee-high boots clacking on the cracked marble floors and rotting hardwood staircases, candelabra in hand, high out of your mind because they just loved to put cocaine in absolutely everything, did those victorians. the dream.

You're nothing without me

"humans are naturally selfish and evil" factoid actually just statistical error. former united states president ronald w. reagan,

But what if it was all a dream

This is more unsettling. I know it's there. I know it should be there. I know this pristine landscape is hiding its horrors like teeth.

[I.D. an edited version of the "children's hospital" meme photo where the splattering red pattern on the hall floor has been removed. End I.D.]

Well duh. It’s just color theory

I think Americans in general should maybe start taking xenophobia more seriously. Because with the. Everything going on in the world right now. It's gotten really really bad. And while lefties might not be reactionary to the same extent as republicans it's still very much prevalent. I went to dinner with my family recently and the stuff they said about my cousin's family who emigrated from Russia made me feel like I was losing my mind. He's 2 years old. How are you going to discriminate against a baby with a clear conscience. Then you read the news and it's like "China is spying on you with TikTok and weather balloons" and you hear people on all angles of the political compass repeat it. Are you hearing yourself right now. Are you for real

Cannot believe I have to say this but I am Lakota. as in native american. As in almost everyone's family came to the united states from another country at one point, except for the people who were already living here. Like my mom's family. And I live here.

Immediately assuming I must be a white european because I disagree with widespread american xenophobia is prelly wild. Honestly. When I mentioned my family and America in the same post I thought it was clear that I live here.

"But you said you had family from Russia?"

Yes. People get married sometimes. My cousin married someone from Russia. They had a baby. He's a good baby btw. Fantastic little dude. I hope he grows up in a better world than this one.

I can't speak for people living in other countries because I don't live there. I live here. I don't think it's my place to berate people from other countries because that's kind of the problem. Maybe I should have started this post out like a presidential speech. My fellow Americans. Now more than ever.

Reading comprehension test:

2. What does "xenophobia" mean?

3. Is possible to care about other people? if yes, then:

3.1: even if they're from another country?

3.2: even if they speak another language?

3.3: even if I don't like their government?

The only tiktok trend that matters is people filming those easter chickens and then going “who did ____ without permission?” and one of the chickens is so fucked up and its obvious who the answer is and the intro to You Gotta Move by Mississippi Fred McDowell is blasting

LEAVE THESE ANIMALS ALONE!!!

You know. Some people could really stand to get more comfortable with the idea of “you shouldn’t say that because it’s mean”. Especially with really common body shaming and straight up bullying lines.

“You shouldn’t make ugly bald jokes because what if a transman on T sees it!”

“You shouldn’t make virgin jokes because what if someone who’s asexual sees it!”

How about you just don’t make them because they’re mean. How about people can be balding or a virgin for a number of reasons and also don’t deserve to be routinely made fun of. How about saying that the reason you shouldn’t make x joke because it spares x specific identity’s feelings also let’s them know that you actually have no problem saying or thinking bald people are ugly or virgins are stupid or etc but you’re just not saying it in front of them. How about you understand this kind of body shaming and bullying especially in a very public setting online are always going to have way more unintended damage to people who did nothing wrong than damage to the person you’re upset with.

Sometimes the best reason to not make a bad joke like that is because it’s fucking mean.