Okay, I hate job searching, but I do love applying to Catholic institutions

Where else are you going to see this?

This is the most 1998 thing I’ve read in my life.

Cougar (Puma concolor)

A cougar licks another cougar. Both are very concerned. 

oh sorry

My longhouse is perfectly constructed. Every morning when I wake up in bed at the far end of my longhouse, I say my syllable. Then I spend all day sitting in bed. By sunset my syllable has traveled to the other end of my longhouse and back, and as it smacks me in the head, I fall asleep. My longhouse is perfectly constructed.

children outside screaming: annoying but ultimately for the greater good. children need Going Outside and Screaming Time for proper emotional development. an auditory burden I am willing to bear

neighbor with his car he made louder on purpose: jail for neighbor. jail for ten thousand years

god i love fragrantica people so much

Mother cats pretending to be scared of their pouncing babies is something I never tire of.

boing!

Scientific fraud is the most baffling thing ever to me like do they think they're just going to make a huge breakthrough and no one will notice that it's fake by trying to replicate their results

Yeah actually I just discovered how to turn plastic into gold. Oh you want to know how I did it

Starts running away cutely

Calvin and Hobbes - It’s July Already

there is a demon in your house named CARBON MONOXIDE. he enchants your mind with confusion and your body with exhaustion. you need to call a powerful exorcist named HVAC TECHNICIAN

A BEAR ATE MY BEST HUMMINGBIRD FEEDER.

Rude.

Someone tell that bear he's not supposed to eat that with the skin on.

Today in Dracula: Local lawyer lives out every lawyer's fantasy of whacking their worst client with a shovel.

So very close.

Yet a universe away.

true story

this was his response 5 seconds later

Very upsetting that on this fresh morning in this broken world I am subjected to emails

I don’t know what you’re doing with your one wild and precious life but I’m making tables in word documents

The soft animal of my body does not love spreadsheets

All my life I was a bride married to amazement but unfortunately I also had to attend zoom meetings

I don’t know why this caption made me laugh so hard