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You’re done with dying.

@noodle-persom

Currently in my homestuck era, Skaia help me
Pronouns: they/them (blog owner is a minor btw)
Resident Knight of Light

Hello! If you’re someone who just came from Twitter or you’re simply interested in tumblr and you haven’t been scared off by the recent shit postings of hundreds of users desperately trying to keep drama out by scaring off any and all Twitter users the congratulations! I.. don’t know why you would come to this blog though.

I’m not going to uselessly rant about all the functions of tumblr and how tumblr etiquette works seeing as many others have already been doing so. Though I am in the middle of reblogging a bunch of posts akin to that and I will be putting it under the tag “#how to survive tumblr” so you can have an easier time searching for it.

If you didn’t know already, tags work as an easy way to section your posts (this can be better explained but it’s 4 am and I’m too lazy) allowing for people to click on your blog, click a tag and then see all the things you’ve posted under that tag.

I hope this will come in handy for those who don’t back down from the revival of old tumblr. But to those who are weak, this service is not for you. Return to where you once came pathetic Twittypet.

(If you’re seeing this and you aren’t a refugee, please don’t reblog unless you want to add useful information to the post for people who are new)

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“tumblr became bad because of porn ban” “tumblr is bad because of bots” “tumblr is bad because there’s hateful people who post freely” THE AUDIO POST HAS A COPYRIGHT DETECTOR NOW. DOESNT ANYONE REMEMVER WHEN YOU COULD PUT ANY SONG ON HERE AND LISTEN AND SCROLL AND LOVE????????????? STOP SENDING ME TO SPOTIFY APP

PSA: i keep seeing posts about staying cool in extreme heat that include advice like "gatorade is bad actually!" and "don't drink fruit juice it'll just dehydrate you!" and neither of these are true!

regarding fruit juice: there's apparently a misconception that Any Sugar At All will dehydrate you, and that's simply not true. yes, sugar will make you pee more when consumed in large amounts, but 1) the natural sugar in fruits won't do this to you 2) great news! a lot of fruit juices exist without any added sugar in them! 3) honestly even having a glass of the fruit juice with added sugar won't completely dehydrate you as long as you're also drinking water throughout the day. if its hot you deserve a cold treat of a drink!!! can't go wrong with fruit juice!!!

regarding gatorade: maybe this isn't an every day drink, but guess what: if it's 110F/40C or hotter outside, and you don't have AC, or you're moving around a lot outside of the AC, and you're sweating buckets: that's when you drink a gatorade.

gatorade exists to replenish all the electrolytes (salt) and glucose (sugar) that you sweat out. YES it is meant for athletes to drink during intensive work outs and not necessarily for people who aren't doing that kind of exercise. BUT GUESS WHAT! when you're sweating buckets because you had to walk to the bus in extreme heat, that's intensive exercise. please feel free to drink a gatorade after that! that's its intended use case!!!!

no: neither of these drinks should be a total replacement for water. but drinking a lot of water and then treating yourself to a fruit juice with lunch is a good idea!!! drinking a gatorade becuase you just had to walk for 20 minutes in the heat is a good idea!!!

Please Stop Spreading Misinformation About Drinks!!! It's fine if you drink things that aren't water!!!! Yes you should probably always be drinking water but drinking something else As Well isn't going to hurt you!!!! okay!!!! its fine!!!!!!

honestly so long as you are consistently getting Any (non-alcoholic) fluids in you, you're doing great!!!!!! okay!!!! i love you stay safe <3

I want Markiplier to be in the fnaf movie but not as a character I want him to have a face cam and act like he’s playing a new fnaf game. Starts off the movie with the HELLO EVERYBODY MY NAME IS MARKIPLIER and then the rest of the movie is just like this.

Even better: if they release the movie on DVD, the director's commentary is replaced with Mark commentating like it's a game and he's controlling the main character, all set up in typical let's play style.

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issue: the kittens are still trying to learn words. gus knows his name and daisy knows hers, but they don’t seem to quite grasp that when I say “babies!” im referring to both of them.

hypothesis: “babies” is too similar to “daisy” and they’re getting confused

test: start saying “gamers” instead

Outcome: they’re understanding it and it’s hysterically funny

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me, calling down the hall from stirring a can of cat food: LET’S GO, GAMERS

the kittens:

Yes please show us the gamers

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here’s the gamers! Daisy is on the left and August is on the right! i spent 45 minutes trying to get this shot

I love drawing cats

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OH MY GODDDDD

in this terrifying world you continuously have the power to offer someone else a little relief . why would you withhold that. do you remember what a little relief feels like? it feels like a lot

excuse me? are you suggesting i frolic directly into someone's emotional space and assume what brings them relief, potentially causing more stress? are you encouraging people to reach past their own boundaries to help, increasing net suffering if it costs more than the other gains? surely not; that would be advocating for emotional self-harm.

this is a post about the woman who waived my late fee at the bank .

good for you, good for her, the wording on the initial post feels closer to blaming people who don't reach out than celebrating those who do by a large enough margin that i feel the need to hit back

you are a tar pit

I know I’ve reblogged this already today but I like. this point

She cog on my machine till I-

[EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER NOISE]

She spy on my liar till I-

[EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER NOISE]

god damn, I really hope whoever reads this has a good day

like

I don't know you

but I can tell you really do deserve a good day

whatever it takes to make today a good day, if possible, please do it

sometimes people try to tell me that scientists are paragons of rationality and I have to break it to them that I have yet to work in a lab that didn’t have at least one weird secret shrine in it

new guy: why is all of the equipment in this room covered in toys?

me: dONn’t touch those

new guy:

me: they need the toys to function. if they don’t all have toys they get jealous.

new guy:

new guy:

me: when something breaks just take the wizard and wave it around for a while. they seem to like that.

Science is rational, scientists are human. 

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In Taiwan we have a special brand of snacks named 乖乖 (literally means “well behaved” but in a casual way like when one’s compliment a child or a pet of being good) that has green package.

It has become the lucky charm in the IT industry because engineers believe it will make machine acting good (like the name of the snack) and stay in green light (like the color of the snack’s package) when a 乖乖 is put on top of a server.

It is the only food allowed in a server room and the biggest semicondoctor company in Taiwan (which is also the biggest worldwide) even commissioned the snack factory to make a customized version with blessing on the package.

This is how a server room is blessed by 乖乖. You put at least one on top of each server. It’s important that the engineers change them before the expire date because legend says the snack looses it’s power after expire date.

You’ll hear engineers swearing up and down that their server room crushed down the one time they forgot to change the snack.  Or some newbie ate the forbidden snack put on top of their server and caused a disastrous crush down.

The 乖乖 religion later spread to all people who want their machine to act nice. In the lab we put 乖乖 on ultra-low freezer (you really don’t want it to drop dead along with your 2 years’ worth of sample/data), mass spectrometer etc.

When Taiwan’s about to launch the first self made satellite in 2017, the develop team even put 乖乖 around the satellite model to prey for a successful launch (it did). This shit is real.

Broke: Humans are inherently good

Broke: Humans are inherently evil

Woke: Humans are, for good or evil, inherently ridiculous