The Band

Alex Turner

singer, songwriter, guitarist
deceptively tiny - a beAN in fact
many different hair eras - pick your favourite and defend it with your life
a lyrical genius but unable to string a normal sentence together in everyday conversation (that rock ‘n’ roll, eh?)
used to go out with Alexa Chung, they were beautiful and looked like a renaissance painting when they kissed and everyone cried when they broke up
dances like a drunk uncle at a family barbeque but no one will stop him? someone pleasesave him from his own hubris

Matt Helders

drummer, aka the agile beast, aka matthew j helders iii
strong and friendly
FALSETTO
a beautiful and funny man
is engaged to the girl (Breana) in the suck it and see video, a fact thay makes me die of of laughter everytime i think about it. recently announced that soon they shall be parents
Kayne once said he was almost as good as Phil Collins, Matt probably cried when he heard

Jamie Cook

guitarist
he has the strongest accent of them all it’s glorious
“”jameh””
hates twinnings tea
married to the wonderful katie, also soon to be a father
the babies first word will probably be “eh”

Nick O’ Malley

bassist
an unproblematic cinnamon roll?
Yellamo Salohcin
Has a beautiful baby boy named Hearst, the first tru Dad of the band
only joined after the first album was out for four months, replacing andy nicholson, learned the entire repetoire in two days

they’ve all been friends since they were tiny so there’s never any drama or fights or anything, it’s all good vibes and happy times? a good bunch of people

The Albums

Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not

sort of a concept album except not really, deals with themes of growing up and going out in the north of england
“oh well they might wear classic reeboks/or knackered converse/or tracky bottoms tucked in socks”
a massive massive success, fastest selling album in british chart history etc etc
makes u all nostalgic for the good times u never experienced u kno

Favourite Worst Nightmare

sounds harder and louder sort of
a lot of ppls fave album? i can see why its very very good
went straight to mumber 1, won awards etc etc
srsly its so good
LETS’AVEAGAMEONTHETEDDYPICKERNOTQUICKENOUGHCANI’AVEITQUICKERALREADYTHICKANDYERGETTIN’THICKER

Humbug

my favourite album
some o’ that ‘umbug music, that full moon music eh?
lyrically out of this world, above and beyond anything else ive ever heard
produced by josh homme, divided fans over their new sound
dance little liar?? secret door?? pretty visitors?? crying lightning?? what a good glorious album??
the best hair era imho
atmospheric and dreamy like alexs voice is so? but still really exciting, lots of good sing-along songs too. but dark and broody u kno

Suck It And See

a really distinct sweet jangly guitar sound, summery and bright
ok theres this video of alex doing suck it and see and he wont shut up about dandelion and burdock and like. this is Peak Alex he has never looked this good before or since its a vision of beauty
then they all started wearing leather and riding bikes and alex got a quiff
matt sings lead vocals on ‘brick by brick’
also no, ‘suck it and see’ doesnt mean what you’re thinking, it’s an english phrase that means ‘try it and find out’

AM

the album that got me into the arctic monkeys
made them the global sucess they are today, but also like. divided fans once more bc suddenly am were popular and that always shakes things up
[[quiff and leather intensifies]]
i still unironically love it i listen to it like once a week
the last song is actually a john cooper clarke poem al reworked
alas al has now lost the quiff and is now growing some sort of gel monstrosity on his scalp, also he refuses to shave, maybe his new girlfriend taylor can help

Other Projects

Miles Kane + The Last Shadow Puppets

on the FWN tour the monkeys were supported by a band called The Rascals, fronted by one Mr. Miles Kane, a beautiful and talented turtle from liverpool
Miles and Alex immediatley ~~fell in love~~ became best friends and started writing songs together
in 2008, in between FWN and Humbug, they released an album called The Age Of The Understatement under the name of The Last Shadow Puppets
wikipedia describes it as ‘baroque’ and i really cant fault that
its big and loud and glourious and beautiful and it sounds like a western or a thriller or some other massive vista spanning soundtrack
its honestly the best thing either of them have ever done
Al and Mi keep doing things that make us think there’ll be another one, in the last few weeks the rumour mill has been especially busy
Also you should definitley listen to Miles’ own albums, Colour of the Trap and Don’t Forget Who You Are, as Miles is beautiful and stylish and one of my favourite people and an astoundingly talented musician and both Noel and Paul Weller guest star on his albums
oh yeah and alex bought him and miles matching turtlenecks for christmas
a handy and useful masterpost of Alex and Miles interactions
Alex and Miles are also. Uh. Look one time NME gave them the “Pete‘n’Carl” award.

i mean look at this

GIF by follow-mossmerized

Submarine Soundtrack

Richard Ayoade is an old friend of the band and asked Al to do the soundtrack to his film, Submarine, so Alex did and its beautiful
it sounds like stars and dreams and midnight and fireworks
i cry almost every single time i listen to it

More Fun Arctic Monkeys Facts

the NME is obsessed with them they had an entire issue dedicated to AM when it came out
oh yeah the band also has like a secret “”alter ego”” called The Death Ramps which is like? a fake biker gang that alex made up so they could release stuff pseudonymously. also miles kane is a member and alex made them all matching death ramps rings and he and miles never take theirs off
this is a very useful masterpost and has more accurate info
and this cover compilation is also very nice indeed
jamie cook used to work as a tiler even when he was still in the band
matt is also a dj he’s very very cool like that
matt’s tour diaries are essential viewing
oh yeah and alex’s short story A Choice of Three which is really good
al contibuted to the Mini Mansions song Vertigo and it’s awful but his verse is weirdly mesmerising. but the rest of it is really bad, als part is from 1:29 to 2:15 so u can ignore the rest
honestly one of the coolest and my most favourite bands please enjoy your journey

This makes me happy and i want to print it and hand it off at random people

GUYS. SPACE.

THERES GONNA BE A TOTAL LUNAR ECLIPSE THIS SUNDAY (SEPTEMBER 27, 2015) OF A SUPER MOON. THIS HAS ONLY HAPPENED 5 TIMES SINCE 1910 AND WONT HAPPEN AGAIN UNTIL 2029.

Why is this important? Not only because its a fucking TOTAL LUNAR ECLIPSE but it’s one of a SUPER MOON. Basically the moon has a slightly elliptical orbit around the earth, and when it’s at it’s closest it’s called a super moon because it appears 14% bigger and 30% brighter. Lunar eclipses do happen relatively often at least in terms of astronomy, but total ones where the moon is completely covered by the earth’s shadow are a little more rare.

I mean, it’s not really important, more just Cool As Fucking Hell.

So basically this is going to be ONE HELL OF A LUNAR ECLIPSE. I suggest not missing it. Grab your friends or other loved ones and go watch this cool ass shit. It’s supposed to start at 9:07 EDT.

Here’s a link with some info on it.

#space #!!!!!!#save