Me at 3am clicking “keep reading” on the most jaw dropping, earth shattering, pantie dropping, smutty fic when I have to be up in 3 hours

nokaspereira03

cadaverkeys

One of my favourite post formats is when someone with a similar URL to op torments them like they are failed clones of each other and it completely changes the tone of the original post.

nokaspereira03

incorrectsmashbrosquotes

Soulsborne Final Bosses poorly explained

Dark Souls: God is senile, forcibly retire him.

Dark Souls 2: Lich King Cersei Lannister tricked you into doing her dirty work or Treebeard with the One Ring beats your ass.

Dark Souls 3: Parry all you want, you can’t parry the feels.

Sekiro: Swordsman hatches from grandson, shoots you in face.

Bloodborne: Local paraplegic regains use of legs specifically to kick your ass. Failing that, the moon does it for him.

Elden Ring: Kill God’s malesona and pet amoeba.

nokaspereira03

notmanagingmymischief

radishnt

which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?

mothman-misato

y- you were putting it in cold water?????

boimgfrog

Radish. Answer the question radish.

radishnt

yeah??? i thought for like. 5 years that ppl just put it in hot water 2 speed up the tea-ification process didn’t realize there was an actual reason

boimgfrog

You dont have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes???

[ID: Tags reading “u think i have the patience to boil water wtf ?????” /End ID]

why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it

boimgfrog

Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove

Its takes less than a minute

boimgfrog

Bestie is ur stovetop powered by the fucking sun

How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove

boimgfrog

Like seven minutes

Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat n it boils in like two minutes… less than that is u use a saucepan…

boimgfrog

Crying you’re putting the whole mug on the stove ???? On medium heat???? Ur stove is enchanted

pidoop

Every single person in this post is a fucking lunatic

silverjirachi

Yet another post that reads like four shakespeare characters who come out in the middle of the play to talk about something completely unrelated for comic relief

wizardlyghost

(Enter RADISHN’T, MOTHMAN MISATO, BOIMG FROG and CATS'N RAINCOATS, stage left. They are having a HEATED DISCUSSION.)

RADISHN’T: Prithee, which one of you had planned to tell

Of diff'rent flavours gained by simple act

Of brewing tea with water hot, not cold?

MOTHMAN: Egad! you poured the water cold? Wherefore?!

FROG: An answer from you, Radish, I must beg.

RADISHN’T: Indeed I did, dear friends - why does this shock?

Without the guide of others I assumed

That heat was merely added for the sake

Of expediting this solution’s brewing!

Half a decade I have spent, or more,

Not questioning this worldview I had made.

In fact, I am myself a bit surprised

That you might think that I, your dearest friend,

Might have a patience of sufficient stock

To wait until a pot of water boils.

FROG: Three minutes overtaxes patience so?

The microwave will beep when it is done!

CATS'N: My friend, this answer vexes me the more!

Can it be true that thou dost boil by nuke?!

FROG: Are you in turn, my friend, so shocked to know

That I have not the patience, like our Root,

To boil upon the stove our favour’d drink?

CATS'N: It takes less than a minute!

FROG: On what plate?

Perhaps your dinner cooks atop the sun?

CATS'N: How long can take your stove to fill the task

Of boiling but a single cup alone?

FROG: In minutes?

CATS'N: Yes!

FROG: I counted seven, once.

CATS'N: Perhaps you ought to have your timepiece checked!

If on a middle heat you place the cup

You soon will have the scalding drink you crave.

Two minutes, in a mug upon the plate

Or even less, if you should have a pot.

FROG: You cause me tears - is this how thou dost live?

You place upon the iron stove a mug?

A mug, ceramic, filled with water cold?

How do these flames, though medium in height,

Not shatter like a glass this fragile thing?

Surely, then, your kitchen is bewitched

With magicks far beyond the mortal ken!

(The FOUR realise they have wandered into the THRONE ROOM. The ROYAL COURT watches with fascination.)

KING: Ev'ry single person in this group must be a fucking lunatic, it seems.

GIF by netgumbo

notmanagingmymischief

normal-horoscopes

Anonymous asked:

Hey I love your blog but tarot is a closed cultural practice belonging to the Romani people and should not be practiced by non Roma. The west likes to steal things then say they aren't closed bc everyone does it but if you can respect dream catchers and spirit animals being closed you can accept that tarot is closed too

normal-horoscopes answered:

saying tarot is a closed practice to romani people is like saying moneylending is a closed practice to Jewish people. Not only is it wrong, but it's racist as hell.

Tarot divination was invented in 1785 by notably non-romani french hermetic occultist Jean-Baptiste Alliette. While romani peoples famously specialized in tarot divination as a way to make some cash, any stories you hear about tarot having it's origins as an ancient egyptian form of cartomancy brought to europe by Roma travellers is entirely false orientalism, and likely made up for marketing purposes.

crystallineandsibylline

I really love how people keep rolling up on this Romani-run, clearly educated, occult-centric blog to spread the White Gospel of Closed Tarot

normal-horoscopes

To be fair, I'm only ethnically romani, I'm barely connected to the culture, but I know a whole hell of a lot about the history of cartomancy.

normal-horoscopes

Off topic but this sent me

Diagnosed with Nightmares of the Pussy

nokaspereira03

zhoban-blog

A friend posted this on Facebook. And yes, it does work. I did it with the S.T.A.K.E magnum. Reverts it back to base form but like… now you have an infinite ammo magnum for boss fights.

nokaspereira03

eyezehuhh

nokaspereira03

drinkingnoodlesandeatingtea

theinsects

there is no greater mystery than What Was That Deleted Video In My Youtube Playlist

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