Just got fired from my job for bombing south-saharan farmlands, can anyone spare 700 000 dollars so I can buy a small carribean island?

$0/$700000

Is this a joke?

what the fuck why would I joke about this

“Sunset over the Grocery Box,” by me. The view from my father’s front yard in January 2014.

“Sunset at the End of My Driveway (Excluding Pavements Covered With the Shite of One Million Dogs)” by me.

“Sunset from My Front Yard Taken on an iPod Touch in 2010″

“Sunset in Nov 2021 Taken in the Parking Lot of the Pharmacy”

“sunset from the parking lot of the diner taken on an iphone 5 in 2016”

the view across the road partially eclipsed by house, 2017

Taken from a stepladder putting up Christmas lights

-2014, front yard

“Brewing Storm on an Evening Commute”

And “Finally, no Power Lines”

-Sept. 30, 2020, passenger seat of a moving Buick

Behind a near-defunct mall in super small-town OK. HUGE rays.

no but tumblr is just what human beings are like when just allowed to be. middle school class on a school trip energy mixed with neolitic village around the fire at dusk energy mixed with hippie commune energy mixed with archaic greek aural epos energy mixed with

You are not hiding this in the tags.

The so-called "walking popcorn bug" is actually a flatid planthopper nymph covered with a protective layer of waxy white filament, like a cottony cushion.

how the fuck did this bastard learn to teleport

@outpost-31

it's not cringe ❤ not if it's you ❤ not if we're mutuals 🥰

please reblog this i spent way too long on what was supposed to be a quick edit

A STREAKER CUT THE ACTUAL CONTESTANT OFF AND BLEW THROUGH IT LIKE HE’S SONIC THE FUCKING HEDGEHOG WHAT THE FUCK

power move

THE FUCKING DANCE

K

U

N

G

P

O

W

P

E

N

I

S

hello greg. in front of you is a pomeranian. you have to spend five minutes without p

greg. greg i havent even finished explaining the rules yet and you’ve already pet the dog. you failed already. greg you never listen. this is why you’re in here greg

@ fic authors what do you personally consider a successful fic? What’s the bar?

actually writing the fic down

this “bon appetit” meme has turned into some sort of bizarre telephone game where each incarnation sounds more and more different than the original. in what way does “bon appetit” sound like “osteoporosis”

i don’t know but it’s cracking me up every time i even think about it

bon appetit -> bone apple teeth -> bone ??? ??? -> osteoporosis

this has layers, man

$0

Every romance book promoted on tiktok is just full to the brim with horrible "steamy" taglines that are just like... Eyes on me, Little Beast. I'm here to make you Damp

why the fuck did my stupid high brain think the spoons were slugs

oh my god wait theres a dolphin

my first time going to an antique store today - no idea if the order was intentional, but WHERE did they get that t???

Lesbian

Gay

Bisexual

Tumblr user

Where the FUCK is “Hoes Mad, Reblog to have a karkalicious 2009”

You mean THIS “Hoes Mad, Reblog to have a karkalicious 2009”?!????!

neither was komaeda so why the fuck is he there

Yes but also:

ive never been more confused in my entire life

DONT plarp his BEES……what is so difficult to understand about that……..

why are people even questioning obesity in america

why is your tea liquidised?

….. Where exactly do you live that the tea isn’t liquid?!?

ENGLAND. WHERE IT IS IN A BAG AND YOU MAKE IT YOURSELF.

like what do you do with already liquid tea? Microwave it?

No it’s sweet tea you drink it cold

WHO DRINKS COLD TEA???

HAVE YOU NEVER HAD ICED/SWEET TEA BEFORE?!?

so i reblogged this from a british person and i’ve been laughing at their tags for 600 years

England, you stole tea from China.  You’ve had it a mere 4 centuries compared to their 30+.  Don’t play like you’re some kind of authority.

[skeletons ooh-ing]

Shots fired. World War Tea has officially begun.

#INTO THE HARBOR

Englad doesn’t own anything

except that time we owned most of the world

If I stop reblogging this, I’ve gone to the other side.

I have only seen this legendary post in screenshots, so today is a blessed day.

HAH

BOSTON TEA PARTY PART 2

HOLY HELL I FOUND IT

And this is why I love Tumblr

Drinking cold tea is like drinking cold hot chocolate. Sure, you *can* do it, but you *really shouldn’t*

Behold concerned Brit. Chocolate Milk

I only see this on pinterest omg….

OMFG

@riverwriter

BEHOLD THE GREATEST TUMBLR POST

“world war tea” is the best play on words i’ve heard in weeks

this post is a wild ride from start to finish

I haven’t seen this since chocolate milk was added. Is that really just an American thing? You’re missing out guys!

Cold tea

Cold hot chocolate aka chocolate milk

Cold coffee

I mean, do yall even know about cold water or is that an American thing too???

YOU GUYS DRINK COFFEE COLD AS WELL???

OF COURSE WE DO WE’RE GAY

@winterrhayle 

answers please???

This will.never not be the best.

Chocolate milk isn’t actually cold hot cocoa.  What you need is frozen hot chocolate:

Frozen hot chocolate? What kind of alternative universe have I stumbled upon?

Frozen hot chocolate is amazing fight me

This post is so chaotic

Where are these people from in Britain we have ice tea, cold coffee and chocolate milkshake. They are all very popular. These ‘Brits’ are 100% vampires from the 19th century.

Cold tea with 4 cups of sugar, just how we always made it :(

I FOUND IT

*sips my iced chai latte in Indian as in fuck England*

so is cold juice also an american only thing? are y’all out here drinking juice hot?

I-

APPLE CIDER BOA

I FORGOT ABOUT APPLE CIDER

yall drink apple cider cold?

yeah it’s called apple juice

theres a difference between apple juice and apple cider 😭😭😭

apple juice is the first thing that came to mind bc i have never heard of anyone throwing apple cider in the fridge and drinking that bitch cold

my POINT is do you people drink apple juice hot

Hot apple juice is so chaotic, Boa.

But also: COLD TEA SUCKS ASS. Hot tea is the only way to go.

But also, I’ve really only seen this on like, pinterest and shit.

Thiss post was so chaotic I got lost 3 times and had to go back to reread parts

Also hot or cold apple juice is tasty af