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This is my kingdom come, this is my magnum dong,

@necromorph-slayinglovemachine / necromorph-slayinglovemachine.tumblr.com

Hi I'm Kaitlyn and welcome to Jackass
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god fucked up making komodo dragons super venomous aggressive and all around unsuitable for domestication. those beafts should be in our homes

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if i had this thing in my lap i think everything would be alright i bet it would love being scratched on the head if it wasnt already so fond of chewing me and empoisoning me and smacking me hard with its horrible tail