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Is this true?

Happy bisexual Lancelot never believed he was good or nice Monday. What a nice Monday for bisexual Lancelot never believed he was good or nice.

ID: A photo of a highlighted quote in T.H. Whites’ The Ill-Made Knight reading: He loved Arthur and he loved Guenever and he hated himself. The best knight of the world: everybody envied the self-esteem which must surely be his. But Lancelot never believed he was good or nice. /end ID

poll time

“If you have time to be on social media, you also have time for…” “If you have time to watch Netflix, you also have time for…” Yeah, but do I have the energy for it? Do I have the emotional and mental capacity for it? Am I pain-free enough for it? Can I focus on it? Can I do it without leaving my bed? Can I safely do it without risk of (physically or emotionally) injuring myself by pushing past my boundaries?

So, I have a big advice post to write, but until I have the spoons, I want to warn everyone now who has legally changed their first name:

Your credit score may be fucked up and you need to:

I am about to apply for a mortgage and learned that as of 2 weeks ago:

Credit scores influence everything from big home/car loans to insurance rates to job and housing applications.

And for whatever reason, the 3 bureaus that have the power to destroy your life are shockingly fragile when it comes to legally changing one's first name.

So, yeah. Once I get this mess cleaned up for myself, I have a big guide in the works if you find yourself in the same predicament. But with the mass trans migration out of oppressive states, odds are there are a lot of newly renamed people who are about to have a nasty shock when applying for new housing.

Take care, folks.

my submarine got a glory hole connecting to the outside so if someone doesnt have their dick out and inserted and ready to be nipped at by sea life at all times this motherfucker’s hitting the the bottom of the ocean within minutes

I think the only person I've met in real life with 100% career satisfaction was this gal I knew who was a presenter at a children's science museum and delivered every line like she was running a WWE match. Every time you passed the room where she was giving a presentation, you'd hear something like "WHO'S READY FOR CEPHALOPODS?!?" and the kids would go absolutely nuts cheering.

STOP SPEEDRUNNING MY TOWER YOU INGRATES

YOU AREN’T GIVING ME ENOUGH TIME TO RESET THE TRAPS AND HEAL MY MINIONS

WE’RE UNIONIZED I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW

*mashes the skip dialogue button*

Update from the WGA on negotiations

i literally think of that "polynesians first to discover antarctica, not news to maori" headline so much it's so fucking funny

highly skilled ocean voyagers living close to antarctica who have oral history of heading south and discovering a land full of ice sheets and mountains of ice and snow were first to discover antarctica, not news to said group of people

Playing Tears of the Kingdom and thinking about my friend who was confused when our mutual pal said it was easier to find shrines at night since they glow. Friend was confused because he puts Link to bed every evening at 9pm and has him rest til morning, regardless of where he is or what he is doing.

Anyone else have that thing where you get stressed out when someone else is in a bad mood because now it's your responsibility to make them feel better, but if you're in a bad mood and someone tries to cheer you up you get stressed out because now it's your responsibility to pretend that it's helping to make them feel better.

Oh so this is probably a trauma thing too. Bitches have one terrible childhood and then make it their whole personality. I'm bitches.

so uh. this is what the author of The Care And Keeping Of You looks like.

*touching his extremely defined six pack* who did this to you.....

*gently lifting a cup of water to his lips* it's going to be okay. *choking back tears* just a few more sips and then we'll get you a sandwich...

one time I housesat for a woman who kept a list of all her email and password combos on the kitchen table, as well as a checklist of all the places she’d hidden her guns

she also furnished the guest room with a large wicker trunk full of personal files including 1.) financial information and bank records 2.) a collection of racist memes from the early 2000’s and 3.) a folder labeled ‘PAIN AND AGONY’ which contained angry correspondence between her and World of Warcraft representatives, accusing the game of causing her then-13 year old son to develop an online gaming addiction

“did you snoop” what do you think

I love love love etymology because it's like every word has a back story intertwined with so many other words and through that you see ideas and culture and history and people and it's so beautiful okay I love word stories

You can't cut soft cheese in thin slices or wedges because it just gets squished, but you can with hard cheese, cause the protein holds it together. Casein point:

Hold on, I gotta google something really quick

Ok yeah, this is funny

One might say this is a cheesy pun. Not even a gouda one.

This is not the whey.

I personally think it's grate

My little sister's new boyfriend got a tattoo for her about a month ago and he wanted matching tattoos so he decided to get uh. The tattoo on her ankle of her ex boyfriend's name that she hasn't gotten covered up yet

She broke up with him but I also just got the same tattoo

OK my dad also got it

DYLAN!

It took five months but we finally convinced my stepmom to also get it

My fucking manager got it

It is amazing how many ways professors can make their course schedules just. Absolutely useless. Why did you think this format was helpful? What does any of this mean? JUST USE A FUCKING CALENDAR.