Watch: In another clip, Sanders explains the real reason he got into politics.

“assigning genders to babies is wrong”

shoutout to everyone who doesnt actually have a solid Best Friend bc their best friends have better best friends or bc they dont bond enough with people to have best friends or bc their ‘best friends’ constantly come and go and it just kinda leaves em feeling vaguely isolated even though they might have plenty of regular friends

L I F E

me and my friends

WWLMD

what would lizzie mcguire do

lol yes, so then i can shave.

     One minute, 37 seconds.      My legs are shaking. Holy cow, there is no way I can do this. None.      One minute, 29 secods.      I glance around at the faces surrounding the room. Of course my Meeting would take place in the gross, overcrowded cafeteria.      One minute, six seconds.      Somewhere within these four walls, someone has the exact same countdown on their wrist. They’re going through the exact same pressure as me.       54 seconds.      Mom said I should be excited, not nervous. Yet I still find myself wiping my sweaty palms on my dress. I can’t believe she talked me into wearing a dress. I mean, shouldn’t  my Soul Mate meet me as I normally am? All plain jeans, blah shirts, and wild brown curls?      30 seconds.      Something deep within me tells me to stand up. I do, drawing the attention of my tablemates. They all know too. They smile encouragingly up at me. I chew my lip nervously.      25 seconds.      That same feeling pulls me towards the center of the room. My stomach drops away from me as I take a step in that direction.      20 seconds.      I continue in that direction. With each step the tempo of my heart picks up.      19. Faster.      18. Quicker.      17. More rapid.      16.  It’s racing.      Oh my god this is it. The moment my life changes forever.      My eyes search frantically around the cafeteria, searching for someone who looks as nervous as me. For someone who’s heading towards their future with no sense of direction like me.      10 seconds.      The feeling directs me slightly to the left. I turn to accomodate.      5. My heart has given up entirely.      4. I stop walking.      3. Just waiting left.      2. Everything is about to change.      1. Deep breath.

     0000 d 00 h  00 m  00 s

     Someone bumps my shoulder. I twirl around and my gray eyes meet blue, blue ones.      “Hello there, love. It appears as though we’re Soul Mates then, eh?”      As my words fail me, the only thing I can think is “I’m so glad I shaved this morning.”

 I watch my friend carefully. Her excitement is glowing all over her pretty face. Exactly 2 minutes left, she tells me. We’re waiting at the bus stop and the bus is coming in two minutes. I think she hoped she’d meet them on a beach at sunset or something.  ”I mean that’s ok - these things can’t always be romantic I mean my mum met dad when he was working at the book store and it’s not like you can plan it to be romantic I just hoped, I mean everyone hopes don’t they-” she breaks off, looking at me awkwardly. “Sorry. It’s just a big day for me you know.” Yes I do know. You’ve been going on about it for the past year. I smile at her.  ”Don’t worry. You nervous? You’ll be ok, you always are,” I grin, determined not to ruin this for her. It’s selfish of me to be moody. This is her future being determined. Right here. In now, precisely 1 minute 30 seconds.  She smiles at me, but it isn’t quite reaching her eyes. She’s restless and keeps tapping her foot. Her eyes are wide with.. fear? Excitement? Nerves? Probably all of them and a thousand more things I can’t imagine. She keeps checking her wrist. So do I. The bus comes around the corner. 1 minute 10 seconds.  ”Hey. I’ll leave you alone now ok? The bus is here. I’ll sit a couple of seats away, and be there if you need me,” I say, squeezing her arm reassuringly. “Good luck.” I hope it sounded sincere.  The bus pulls up and I climb on first, taking a quick glance at her while I give the driver my ticket. She’s shaking and looks a little green. I want to give her a hug but know I shouldn’t interrupt now. I look at the passengers and it’s full of pensioners. My heart starts beating frantically. What? I can’t see anyone else at the bus stop. But she’s only 18, she can’t end up with a 80 year old.   I turn around and look at her - she’s breathing hard. The bus driver asks if she’s ok but she ignores him. Her eyebrows are creased and her face is flushed. Oh. Oh no. Stay calm. Someone is probably late. I give her a thumbs up and try to smile reassuringly. I think it’s more of a grimace.  I take a seat near the back. Look at my watch. 25 seconds. She sits down a few seats away.

 Suddenly a dark shape runs past my window and a boy jumps on the bus. He has that same frantic look in his eyes. I breathe out with relief.  ”Yeah get on, we’re running late,” the driver says, taking his ticket. The boy looks around, carefully stepping towards the seats. He’s tall and handsome, holding a sketchbook. I smile slightly; my friend hates art.  4 seconds  He spots her.  3 seconds  His eyes widen as he walks closer, as if being pulled by an invisible rope.  2 seconds  My friend stands up too, that same rope tying her to him.  1 second -  ”I was worried the bus would leave. No way could I miss meeting my soul mate!” he jokes, though he looks just as nervous as she. They smile at each other as they both sit down together. I can’t hear what they’re talking about.

 I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Suddenly I’m crying. Hot tears dropping down my cheeks.

 I look at my wrist, scratching at it. Trying to get rid of it. 

 The numbers have never changed.

 They’ve always been at 0.

Oh my god that last one…. My heart… The feels….

AGH ALL OF YOU WRITE A BOOK THIS VERY INSTANT. PLEASE.

this is beautiful and everyone needs to read it

i hate you tumblr, fucking breaking my goddamn heart

Then, one day, you’re having dinner with a friend you’ve known for as long as you can remember (or perhaps a friend of the family), and you finally talk to them about your counter. You’re crying, explaining that it’s always been at 0, and so you must not have a soul-mate.

Their eyes widen. Tears begin to form, and they throw their arms around you.

“Mine has always been at 0 too.”

And that’s when you know…

10 seconds: the doorbell rings, i get out of my chair 5 seconds: i give the man my money 0 seconds: i open the box. it is the most glorious pizza i have ever seen in my life.

This post always has different stories on it and I always have to read it and reblog it

Yeah but can I have that countdown for my period?

what about an ace one?

@godpenis Well, I tried. (it’s not just ace it’s aroace)

As you and her get off of the bus, she smiles at you nervously and the both of you sit together on the nearest park bench. She’d had this moment planned for years, marked the sixteenth of March 2015 on her calendar and in her diary and just below her wrist since the day she’d calculated it on soulmatecount.com - you, on the other hand, while a supportive friend, didn’t understand her true excitement and anticipation at meeting a person she’d then have to spend all her life with. Would she bring them with you on your hangouts, would your friendship still be the same? Would she brag to you about all the kissing and stuff they did? Like, you got that some people found that appealing, but being aroace in a soulmate-driven world was difficult, if one couldn’t tell from the outside.

“Oh, twenty-four seconds! No, twenty-three!”

“Are you excited?” you ask, smiling. Of course she’s excited - you just want to hear her be happy. You love her. Not romantically, but you love her so much and you want her to be so happy with her soulmate.

“Well, yeah! Do you think it’ll be a boy or a girl? Do you think they’ll be my dream person? Or will they be someone completely new and unexpected?”

“What’s it on now, ten? Let’s count down.”

You speak as one. “Six! Five! Four! Three! Two! One…”

Two beeps sound, each one’s silence perfectly filled by the harmonising pitch of the other’s. You both look up and she is at once overcome with happiness, standing up to meet her soulmate, to hold him - it’s a him - for the first time, tell him that she’s been waiting for this moment her whole life. Of course she has. Who doesn’t wait for their soulmate? They laugh about something you didn’t hear, and then you both scoot over to let him sit on the bench. As the minutes go by, they try to include you in their conversation, but you’re distracted. For the first time in a while, you look at your counter.

That’s when you see that you have got thirteen seconds remaining on your counter.

Frantically, you look around - your soulmate is thirteen seconds away? You’ve talked about it with your close friends, the ones you know; the thing is, you’re not sure what you’ll do with a soulmate when you have one. Will they want to date you? To… have sex with you? You’re not sure you could be fine with that, even if it’s for the person you’re destined to spend your life with. You subconsciously pull at your counter - but it’s at eight seconds now, and falling.

“Everything okay with you over there?” her soulmate asks, concernedly. You quietly note that it’s exactly the thing she said she’d always wanted her soulmate to be, compassionate.

“Yeah,” you reply - and suddenly the last two seconds slip away and then you look up and a girl on the other side of the street catches your gaze, both of your counters beeping at exactly the same time. There is no harmony, as there is for a romantic soulmate. There is no dissonance, as there is for a one-sided soulmate. The two of you are simply perfectly in sync, and you get how others must have felt about this moment all of their lives.

Before you can process it, she’s crossed the street to meet you and she’s babbling about how she can’t do dating and how she didn’t even figure and how she’s never really planned for this and all you can say is that, if her shirt design is anything to go by, the two of you are going to be the best friends of all time.

I LEARNED RECENTLY THAT PLATO WON THE GOLD MEDAL IN THE OLYMPICS FOR WRESTLING THREE TIMES. THIS PUTS A NEW PERSPECTIVE ON THINGS. I ALWAYS IMAGINED PLATO TO BE FRAIL AND MISSHAPEN BUT HE MUST HAVE BEEN FRICKEN RIPPED. I WONDER IF ARISTOTLE EVER FELT ANXIETY ABOUT GETTING PHYSICALLY (I.E. NOT JUST METAPHYSICALLY) DISMANTLED BY PLATO. PLATO WAS PROBABLY PISSED OFF BY AT LEAST A HANDFUL OF QUESTIONS ARISTOTLE ASKED HIM. ARISTOTLE WAS A LITERAL GENIUS TOO. IMAGINE PLATO LECTURING AND WRITING ON A BLACKBOARD AND ARISTOTLE THROWING A COMMENT OUT THERE ABOUT SOME COMPLEX MISSTEP IN PLATO’S LOGIC AND PLATO’S CHALK JUST SNAPS AND ARISTOTLE’S TESTICLES SUCK WAY BACK UP TO WHERE THEY DROPPED FROM, THEN PLATO WITH APE-LIKE AGILITY APPEARS BESIDE ARISTOTLE SITTING AT HIS DESK AND HE PICKS HIM UP AND SUPLEXES HIS MACEDONIAN ASS.

Goals

wow

This is more entertaining than it should be.

This is why I love Tumblr.

two hours later i click reblog

five hours later i click reblog

It’s more fun if you move a quarter of a second before the cat does so it looks like it has a shitty reaction time

Something my sister said once, that’s become an important thing to me (via legally-undead)