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emily

@murrrphhh-blog

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s-unberry
But what the fuck did you expect? What the fuck could you have done to make the outcome any different? No one tells you that there’ll be a guy who loves to tell you forever when he’s drunk and kisses you when he knows he won’t remember the taste of your mouth because she’s got cherry lipstick and you could’ve sworn he said he loves strawberries so you don’t believe it And everything becomes before and after when everything falls apart Because it was just a blade before you put it to your wrist And love was just a word before he said it to you and your heart clawed itself out to fit in his palm And forever was just a fucking concept before he promised it to you and all you could do was believe it A few years later people will ask you if you’ve ever been in love and they’ll ask you if you think you’ll ever find the one you’ll be left saying well I already found him he just didn’t feel the same and you’ll still feel that physical ache but you’ll act like the crater he’s left in your heart isn’t there and the pain hasn’t stopped you just pretend it isn’t there Because it had to be real and how the fuck could it not have been when the only reaction to seeing him kiss that other girl was to run for the bathroom and throw up for what felt like days but was only a few hours just fuck Jesus Christ it hurts because you still feel the burn in your throat even now That’s not just a fucking feeling that’s a synapse to nerve-ending biological ache

When you try convince yourself it wasn’t real (via sorryalways)

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