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WTF i am just chilling

@muffinrag / muffinrag.tumblr.com

hooooouguguugh the faggotry

all your stuffed animals love you. they're not sad if they're in a box, or on the floor, or not held/played with as much. they understand. they know that you might need another stuffie more, or that you don't have enough space. they're just happy to be with you, and if you ever give them away, they'll be happy there too. stuffies are for comfort. they understand. they love you too. it's okay.

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the glorification of your 20s and fear of anything else has got to stop. mainly bc your 20s is quite literally the worst decade of your life the idea that ppl think you peak at 25 has me so sad for them

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also when ppl act like 20s is peak sexiness. im 26 so if you presented a 22 year old as the pinnacle of desirability i would morph into a chimpanzee and rip you limb from limb. WHAT am i supposed to do with someone who hasn't even gone thru the age 23 ego death

june is NOT pride month. it’s the month when people on the internet who have never been in irl lgbt spaces or have irl lgbt friends will be like “lgbt people need to STOP sucking and FUCKING during pride parades” and then when you go to a parade, instead of seeing the promised sucking and fucking, you get pelted with gay pens from bank of america 

I’m God’s weakest twink

if anyone is wondering why i came back to tumblr out of nowhere it’s because i was very high and playing splatoon 3 and i said “if i win this game i post on tumblr” and this was the first post that came to my head

Anonymous asked:

If you fold a pizza in half, is it a sandwich?

the language is not some inherent truth of life. we made the words as a lens to better understand the world.

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no one in the comments has listened

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i think if you folded a pizza in half it wouldn’t be very easy to eat and i would not eat it anyway actually because i am lactose intolerant. but if i did eat it i would unfold it first because the folded pizza would be too tall to fit in my mouth unless i squished. also if i shoot a bullet from the moon and it kills someone in texas do the texas police have jurisdiction or do the moon police?

you, though. 

you have listened.