Mr. Distracted's Distractions

just sayin'

This should be taught in school.

omfg i forgot that i never showed tumblr my greatest achievement. my pride and joy, my pi-ass de résistance

you're welcome

if you reblog this i am kissing you on the mouth. no that is not negotiable. we are in love now. we are dating. we are planning the wedding. i will be with you on your wedding night

i hate nerves and anxiety. oh nooo i am scared of acting like a weird bitch to remedy this i will act like a weird bitch

The. Cruelty. Is. The. Point.

So Arizona launched an “education hotline” that allows “concerned parents” to report “””critical race theory””” and other things like ~gender identity~ being taught in the classroom

It would be a shame if the number and email were spread to bad actors looking to prank call the AZ Department of Education

602-771-3500 or empower @ azed .gov 🤡

and for the love of god, don’t just spam it with memes or le funny shrek jokes or whatever, they’ll just hang up

make plausible-sounding reports for things that don’t actually exist, so that they actually have to waste time/resources investigating false leads - the goal is to waste time they would otherwise be using to do their jobs, not to get tumblr clout for being an epic troll

So apparently the internet article said the superintendent wouldn't be deterred by the prank calls because they would 'taper off eventually'. It'd be a real shame if this post stayed in circulation via queues so they get a consistent list of prank calls to filter through. 😇

Found this perplexing toilet paper holder yesterday. They’re in love and they’re here to help

Found for just under $3 at The Hope Chest in Pekin, IL! Alas, they did not come home with me.

One thing I want to point out about nimona is that it captures tenderness in such a visceral way that I haven’t really seen in 3D animation before? Like the way the characters curl into each other and melt makes me go INSANE

me: i don’t want to see jellyfish so i will blacklist the tag #jellyfish

people with no common sense: je11yf1sh, je11¥fi5h, j*llyf*sh, je//ÿf!sh, j3ï||yf¡sh, gel lee fisk

result: cannot account for the sheer amount of possible ways to alter the word jellyfish

conclusion: i have to see jellyfish now.

Once again, tumblr is not tiktok, tag properly.

Be not aroused!

I have a bunch of Critical Role prints! Find them here -> Prints

Anyone else have that thing where you get stressed out when someone else is in a bad mood because now it's your responsibility to make them feel better, but if you're in a bad mood and someone tries to cheer you up you get stressed out because now it's your responsibility to pretend that it's helping to make them feel better.

Oh so this is probably a trauma thing too. Bitches have one terrible childhood and then make it their whole personality. I'm bitches.

I did a bunch of paperwork today so I deserve as much beer as I could possibly desire

Gee, Tumblr would probably really hate it if you shared and spread this damning article … To the surprise of absolutely none of Tumblr’s LGBTQ users, it turns out the independent NYC human rights agency Commission on Human Rights (CCHR) found that Tumblr’s ham-fisted adult content ban in December 2018 disproportionately targeted LGBTQ users. The CCHR’s investigation revealed Tumbler’s moderation algorithms is demonstrably biased against queer content. As part of the settlement, Tumblr was obligated to review their prejudicial anti-gay moderation policies. Even more mortifyingly, they’ve also had to hire an expert on sexual orientation and gender identity (SOGI) issues and provide unconscious bias training to their moderators. I frankly doubt Tumblr has learned a thing from this humbling experience. Just recently the Tumblr algorithm flagged three ancient posts of mine as violating their terms. All three “offenders” were vintage homoerotic beefcake images (softcore by modern standards) roughly 50 – 65-years-old by Bruce of Los Angeles, Bob Mizer and Tom of Finland. (These are of course pioneering queer artists who routinely faced censorship and imprisonment in the fifties and sixties. Plus ca change!). They've been visible on my page - corrupting viewers -  for years at this point. I appealed all three immediately. Only the Tom of Finland one was approved. The other two are now hidden. So, they haven't learned much. Apparently, Tumblr – who loves to declare how hip, youthful, inclusive and progressive their values are - wants to restore trust with their queer users. I’d recommend we remember their hypocrisy when Pride rolls around and Tumblr splashes rainbow flags everywhere and attempts to pink wash their image.

In honour of Pride Month, this is worth a reblog! Don’t buy into Tumblr’s hypocritical “pink washing.” 

Feel freel to say how your relationship with your parent(s) is in the tags.

I found a VHS tape at the junk store, labeled just “A Surprise!”. Since I’d recently set up my VCR and old 80s TV, I thought I should check it out.

Just… just watch. 

Apparently the Tumblr version of this post got no love! Weird. The Twitter version had like two million likes. In case you missed my “glory days”