Rats

SONGS USED

“MAD RAT ALIVE” from Mad Rat Dead OST “Crawling” by Linkin Park The Christmas in July HH Gregg Commercial “Rats Birthday Mixtape” by Jerma985 “London Bridge” by Fergie “Pick Two to Defend You the Rest Are Coming to Kill You: The Song” by Mystery School “Bullet With Butterfly Wings” by The Smashing Pumpkins “Defunctland: The Failure of Disney’s Check E. Cheese Ripoff, Club Disney one bad gloop That One Tiktok with the dude goin “OH SHIT!!! A RAT!!!!!”

You have entered

Mad Rat Monday

This has its own album now. Happy Mad Rat Monday, gamers

She is so angel blue!

someone put this screenshot in my notes and i wasn't gonna put the op on blast but i cannot stop thinking about it. this is up there as one of the funniest doubling downs i've ever seen. "it's called craft. it's called storytelling." is going to enter my meme vernacular and no one is going to have any idea what i'm talking about. the count of monte cristo shows a clear lack of craft in its wordcount. if only ernest hemingway's editor had killed more of his darlings while he wrote for whom the bell tolls. readers and editors alike are always complaining about how fucking long to kill a mockingbird is.

wait ok mutuals what do you guys call your parents???????

Hey! What the fuck is going on in here

no where else

There's having sock puppet accounts, and then there's putting on a puppet show.

I legitimately feel like this could/should become an essential piece of Tumblr lore™

little kids love spooky mascots like bendy and Freddy but I notice they interpret the characters as totally benevolent basically and I think they deserve good quality media that plays into that, a horrifying but objectively heroic protagonist earnestly made for really young audiences. Yeah they got venom but that's still aimed at teens to adult nerds. I guess there's probably no media company right now with the guts to openly market a slavering fanged ghoul as a friendly children's hero but it is literally what they're clamoring for.

I dunno it just feels shiftier how all these newer mascot horror games are only kind of "implicitly" for kids, like they're still made with adult sensibilities and content kids might not be all that prepared to handle yet on the down-low they're hoping to get kids buying merch. Feels off. If you want the baby market then do it unironically and honestly.

There should be like an unironically scary character like you'd expect aesthetically to be the main threat of an adult horror franchise but it just protects kids from harm AND its associated media should be entirely G-rated other than the monster design itself. Make it like a skeleton bat clown with anglerfish teeth or a big black hairy centipede with a bunch of broken baby doll heads but it only hurts mean people and only adults. Or you know there isn't even any violence but it scares away bullies and then it helps the kids find their cat or make a sandcastle or whatever. The writing should not be like it's also for adults. It should be like the level of Bluey or Octonauts, like high quality but intellectually accessible to a three year old. And like the monster lurks anywhere dark like under beds and stuff. Yes there are children who would still be scared of it anyway but there were always children who got scared of big bird or the teletubbies, you know??? I bet other kids would get it and they'd get to feel like the scariest fucker they ever saw is inherently on their side.

bubble tea should be free as a public service given to girls who are in need of a little treat

Your supposedly "eldritch" extradimensional entities are boring and comprehensible. They have knowable motivations and function by desires that map neatly onto human umwelt. Cringe.

"eldritch" is when you just wanna crack open a mikes hard and a nice pasta bake

i think more people ESPECIALLY americans tbh need to get even just cursory knowledge of the protestant work ethic. there is a christo-capitalist reason you feel guilty when you are not working yourself to death. it isn’t just like, a common Symptom or whatever. it is from a deeply ingrained ideology in the west that affects pretty much everyone (even if you are not a WASP, ur still forced into this culture and will deal with its ramifications). 

the protestant ethic and the spirit of capitalism by max weber

Robots (2005) is one of the best animated movies of all time as I’m sure we all agree, and also Aunt Fanny is there.

these new bots are NOT OK. Them having actual tumblr names is giving me psychic damage. I feel like curling up in a corner and crying.

yesterday "remainingforefinger" followed me and the fact that this ISN'T a nonbinary autist from Poland who works as a dentist's assistant, but A BOT, makes me want to SCREAM.

Pour one out for this choice bot url

gen z teenager tweeting "justin bieber is gay" and unknowingly activating ancient mechanisms, making secret network of radiotower pylon ruins built by the 9GAG admins during the obama administration rise out of the ground

at my job we have to go through a training program that teaches us the library of congress classification system, and when i was first being trained my boss started to boot it up and she gave me a really anxious and guilty look and said “listen, i’m really sorry in advance, there’s nothing i can do about this, just…. just try to get through it” and i was like lol what’s she talking about and then the program loaded and i was greeted with a deliriously funny-looking photoshopped wizard with glowing eyes pointing at some intro message like “AH YES, JUST AS THE PROPHECY FORETOLD… APPRENTICE, YOU COME AT A TIME OF MOST DIRE NEED… YOU MUST LEARN OUR WAYS” and my boss just looked at me helplessly and was like “i’m so sorry. it’s like two hours long.”

thankfully it wasn’t an elaborate fever dream and i have found screenshots

Possibly the greatest NPR exchange ever recorded

The orange kitty presented...