VILE piece for today (i do not own a blender i apologize if it looks whack)

also i'm editing this, i did not realize this was whump until i was told it was whump, so be aware you will see more of this!! i'm sorry if this is too intense for some people ;v;

World Heritage Post

reblog and put in the tags what you think will fix you

Possessive Whumper Asks

because i absolutely love possessive whumpers and think they deserve some more attention. <3 of course these can go for just about any whumper too!

—

tagging @obsessedwithegos @thebluejayswhump @whumpsday @oddsconvert @null-whump in case any of you are interested!

not to be problematic but i literally do not give a shit about age gaps when dating vampires. they thirst for your blood. "but it's predatory!!!!" yeah. it is. "they're preying on you!!!" they're vampires. they do that. "it's a power imbalance!!!!!!" what part of vampires are you not getting

they eat people and can turn into bats and crawl around on walls, lizard fashion, and can hypnotize you with your eyes. a) the age gap is not the creepy part and b) the creep factor is kinda the appeal

they don’t age. that’s part of the horror of it actually. would you accept eternal life, if you can never progress? can never grow or change? you’ll live forever, eternal youth, but frozen exactly as you are now. you will never become the person you’re meant to be. you are trapped in the mind of a 17-year-old forever. also ‘theoretically old if you disregard the fact that he’s a vampire’ doesn’t even make the top 20 worst things about edward cullen list. girl he’s mormon. prioritize

I was nodding along with this the whole time until that last sentence, which hit me like a folding chair

Even if it was for one year in fifth grade <3

Extra points for leaving in tags for how many years and if you still do

one of my cousins has one of those wretched sequined nicolas cage pillows and today the rest of us received this photo of perhaps the most upsetting thing i’ve seen all year, slugolas cage

Reality Jumpers AU: Reality jumpers are given the ability to jump between realities, so that they can capture people from alternate realities and bring them back to their reality to use as fuel. Since there are an infinite number of alternate realities...the fuel never runs out.

But this ability comes at a price. If a reality jumper doesn't meet their quota, they become the fuel instead.

Thought process behind this AU and WIPs of the art are here.

PLEASE DO NOT TAG AS LADY/FEM WHUMP. DIRK IS A FEMININE PRESENTING TRANSGENDER MAN. THANK YOU!

---

General Art AU Taglist:

@icyheart-and-friends @whumpsday @estoult @darlingwhump @whump-queen @oddsconvert @cryptidwritings @sparrowsage @wolfeyedwitch @firapolemos05 @whumpinggrounds @whumpnonny @whumpshaped @sukoshimikan @26-letter-symphony @subject-13 @astrowhump @pinkieglitterheart

i wish i could see this picture for the first time again

Every time I see some gamerbro edit of a female video game character to make her 'prettier', I always see something I have mentally dubbed Cockroach Wife Syndrome (in honor of the guy who accidentally conditioned himself to only be aroused by a fantasy of his cockroach wife Ogtha).

That is to say, there is a certain subset of gamerbro who interacts so rarely with real women, that his primary touchstone for how women look is fiction: often video games and anime. So when a video game woman looks too realistic--too close to having traits that one might find in real flesh and blood women--this is foreign to them. This is unattractive. They have been jacking it to hentai and blender animation porn for too many years, and have inadvertently conditioned themselves to only be sexually aroused by the exaggerated cartoonish traits of animated women.

So now every time I see one such edit, I can't help but think. My. What a coincidence you've made her look more like an anime waifu. Truly dedicated to your cockroach wife.

You can’t just breeze over something like “the guy who accidentally conditioned himself to only be aroused by a fantasy of his cockroach wife Ogtha” without at least linking a 20 minute video breakdown of this man’s descent into madness.

Oh is Ogtha not common knowledge? Eight years ago this was posted on reddit:

Two years ago, we got this update on the life of this roachfucker:

TLDR it's a guy who became obsessed with human-sized roaches with human intelligence after reading Kafka in high school, an obsession which eventually came to monopolize his romantic interests (and has sporadically had catastrophic impacts on his life ever since).

what the fuck happened to my post

Wait isn’t there a tma statement with this plot

nesting instinct is probably the one you're thinking of, but there are in fact multiple tma episodes involving sex with bugs. the magnus archives sure is a podcast, huh

We could also call it pygmalion effect. But Ogtha Effect does have a ring to it ngl

Me learning that not only are cishet people into whump, but hardcore conservative Christian transphobes are into whump:

I wonder if they get butterflies seeing Jesus get whipped and tortured in crucifixion reenactments lol

Fun fact I had a Bible stories DVD as a kid (my grandpa two states over gave it to me despite my parents being agnostic) and I watched that shit CONSTANTLY. May have been what got me into whump tbh

couples themed photoshoots and old romance films have such a Grip on me they're all so destian and it makes me unwell LIKE

LIIIIIIIIIKE

MORE

feel free to use these as refs!

even more!!

my fav thing about having ocs is having a basic line of lore for them but as soon as someone asks me about them I completely bullshit everything I tell them. Yeah this wasn't true like 5 minutes ago but now it is

Evil Villain Meets Innocent Civilian

based on this post. i had a cute Dergan idea for it. :3 this isn't whump, just pure humor and fluff...though future whump is implied at the end.

---

"It's nothing personal, really. A man's gotta make money somehow, y'know? And if the government really wants to be paying villains to kidnap and torture innocent civilians to convince the general public to trust a bunch of people in spandex with superpowers with their lives -- well, it's better than a desk job. What was your name again?"

"Derek."

"You seem awfully calm about being kidnapped, Derek."

Derek was sitting calmly as Logan tied him to the chair, making sure his ankles were firmly bound to each chair leg before moving up to his arms, which Derek had helpfully placed behind his back. It was a little irritating; usually his victims would fight back, or beg, and usually cry. Derek did none of the above.

"It's a psychological response to fear," Derek says. "I'm too scared to accept the situation, so my brain is choosing to treat it as a situation that doesn't warrant fear. Sorry if I gave you the wrong impression."

"Oh. No, it's fine. That just means I'm doing my job right."

Whumpmas in July #16: Create a whump meme.

i thought this was close enough to a meme! massive credit to this list by @whumpwillow for inspo

Riot Kings, page 141.1

prev next

req'd by @livingmeatloaf

alright folks, yall know the drill! I Would like to see A Boy, pet tax is due, post 'em in the notes!

text: A friend and a boy.