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milk cat

@molochka-koshka

comms temp closed!! /// 26, languages and art and memes and some fandom stuff, female (she/her), eastern orthodox, big fan of Romanian, Russian, and Danish language stuff these days, anti-cop

Oh it me

Comms closed until September! But Check here for info and DM me if you want to be on a waitlist~

✺ Call me whatever you feel like! I'm not sure if I want my irl name on here or not. Milk is cool, Vanilla is what I go by elsewhere! Koshka works too?

✺26 / F / US

✺Fluent in English, can understand Danish, working on understanding Romanian and Russian mostly now!

✺Potential triggers: Religion (sometimes), politics (rarely), general horror content (sometimes) [let me know if I should warn for anything else]

✺Fandoms I might post art/OCs of:

+TTRPGs like Pathfinder, Call of Cthulhu, and World of Darkness/Vampire the Masquerade/Dark Ages

+(C)RPGs like Pathfinder KM and WotR, Tyranny, maybe BG3, maybe PoE

+Other video game stuff maybe?

✺I'm trying to get better about tagging stuff! Generally if it's my art or ocs I'll specify, if it's just rambles relating to something I'm into I'll specify that too!

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it is such a crying shame that lae'zel has been received the way she has. i absolutely love her character. i love it. she's clearly been forced to endure a brutal and zero tolerance for nonconformance lifestyle, yet she consistently, repeatedly, and unashamedly breaks it for you, a stranger, and her friends. she's forsaking what she thinks will be an eternity of glory with her ancestors for people (players) that can't stand her. why? because she's not conventionally attractive? you are so, so god damned weak dude. and you're missing out.

I was going to do more but I'm just not feeling it today, but!

Here's my circle of spores druid Fevrie, she was abandoned/orphaned (idk which yet) in the Underdark and raised by myconids instead. She's not used to being around other drow really, and sees them as intimidating/hostile--she's most at home around myconids, but doesn't mind being on the surface either. She was venturing out to study surface mushrooms when she was grabbed by the nautiloid and infected with the mindflayer parasite.

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Kind of a random hill to die on rn but "You'd eat this thing you hate if you got hungry enough" does not set a reasonable expectation of what "hungry enough" means for people with food problems.

Like, are we talking "stomach grumbling" hungry enough, or "can't stand up" hungry enough? Cause personally, I can make myself eat a bit of a pork chop if I'm barfy and shaking and can't see straight anymore, but if it's down to "black out for three days and wake up angry and confused" or "willingly swallow prosciutto", I'm having sleep for dinner. And I know this from experience.

People without food problems don't seem to understand this and it drives me insane. "Hungry enough" is for shit like chewing drywall because the alternative is death or cannibalism.

If I say I can't eat something, It means I can't eat it. It Is Not Edible To Me. It's not even appetizing. It literally does not register as food. You might as well hand me a rubber duck.

And it's frustrating!! Trust me, I wish I wasn't like this, too!! This isn't a choice!! I know it can be rude!! It's embarassing!! It's complicated and annoying and irrational!! That doesn't fix the problem!!

I just wish people didn't treat this sort of thing as "being picky" or lacking willpower or basic manners or something. I can't make myself eat certain foods the way you probably couldn't cut your own fingers off. Does that make sense? It's not just food. Fuck

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Not to put you on blast here darlin, but if pinto beans and black beans were exactly the same then why would it matter to you if you switched them? It'd be the same experience, right? Even if you were allergic or had a sensitivity or a nutritional issue?

Also, your daughter in law is a grown adult who is perfectly capable of figuring out for herself what can and cannot go into her body, and if it wasn't important to her, then she wouldn't have told you. If it didn't matter, if it wasn't worth communicating for some reason, she probably would have kept it to herself. She decided instead to communicate with you so that you could meet somewhere in the middle, because she trusted that you would be courteous about it and she knew it would come up in the future- meaning she hopes or expects to continue socializing with you in the future.

Like, I completely understand that not knowing *why* is frustrating, but sometimes people have problems and it's not my job or my business to solve them

Thank you for saying this OP.

Lots of people, my family included, don't get it. And like, I was a massively adventurous eater before I developed symptoms that are likely MCAS, so I can understand mild confusion ("you like escargot, calamari, and oysters, but could never in a million years eat clams?" like yeah it's weird but (icarly meme) I do not control the food sensitivities).

But like... confusion is different than refusing to believe me. *I* get confused about my food issues sometimes. But to actively say "oh you're just a picky little princess" and force the kid that you bragged as a toddler "would eat all their veggies including spinach all the other parents?

Like my parents would always be like, about the like 3 things I ever had issues with "oh you'd eat it if you were starving" and maybe some of the milder ones I could but the worst ones would cause me to gag until I threw up and then I'd end up starving AND dangerously dehydrated! Like... GAH.

(Honestly this ties into a post I've been thinking about making, how so many abled people cannot fathom the idea of bodies being incapable of doing stuff short of being literally paralyzed, and even then they'll usually think people can do a modified variant. Whether it's working or food they go 'well I can do it so everyone can' and like... *shoves dictionary definition of disability at them*)

(An additional note: OP and others may not consider this specific issue a disability, so I'm using that word to describe my own experiences only.)

Yeah, I have ARFID (avoidant restrictive food intake disorder, common amongst autistics & other people w sensory issues) and was. Badly traumatized as a child because I was a ""picky eater"" who was forced to eat things I found disgusting. I do not trust anyone who talks about ""picky eaters"" like the very act of having specific food needs is some grievous insult against the foundation of society. My relationship with food is still fucked up because of this, because instead of acceptance and accomadation I was forced to sit at the dinner table, crying and embarrassed, for hours as I forced myself to eat small bites of things that caused me physical distress in order to earn the right to leave.

And for me, I can generally tell when something will trigger my sensory issues. Yet every time I was told "you have to try something once before you know!!!" despite the fact I was always right, and then sometimes I would be told "WELLL you actually need to try something ten times before you can say you don't like it!!!" which just feels like my family was mad I didn't like the bullshit food they forced me to eat after I said I wouldn't like it.

The way some people talk about us is just so fucked up. Person in the screenshot is a very very tame version, but some people get so personally, aggressively enraged by the idea of someone being "picky" about food. As if it's something we do to personally fuck with you, and not something that leaves you alienated from so much of society. Because it's not fun for you to go out to eat, it's not fun for you to eat at parties or events, meals with family and friends is stressful, you never know if you'll have access to a safefood in public, and even if you do you are hyperaware that you are eating a "kids meal" or a "snack" while everyone else happily eats the grown-up food that disgusts you. I've had multiple times where I almost start crying at a dinner with family because I order something, it's not good for my ARFID, and I get so viscerally embarrassed and ashamed that I can't be normal.

& that's not even getting into the health affects this has had on me– yet people act like it's a quirky life choice. I def agree w stellalunasys; abled people (ableism as a capitalist system in general) don't understand the idea that disabled people NEED to listen to our bodies to survive. It's not just a matter of something literally stopping you. An abled person COULD stick their hand into an open flame, they literally have that ability, and yet for some reason they don't! Almost like they know it would seriously hurt their body!

And like honestly even if it WAS just somebody being picky? So what? Everybody deserves food they want to eat, which is apparently a wild concept for some people but wishing starvation on someone so that’ll they’ll eat something that you’ve deemed essential is not a normal reaction. Wanting to force someone to eat something they don’t want to is a really gross and unhealthy way to interact with someone. Even if you don’t personally get it it’s not your job to disprove or force an expansion of someone’s dietary wants.

This is a lot like forcing kids to hug adults when they don’t want to. Forcing anyone who is relying on you for safe autonomy (bodily autonomy, choices around what to eat) to do something they don’t feel comfortable with is going to teach them that they aren’t allowed to establish boundaries and it causes so many other issues as they grow and makes them feel unsafe when they’re grown.

Here’s a shoutout to anyone who stood up for their food boundaries!

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some time ago i introduced the phrase "food pact" to my friends as a shorthand for "i'll go make and eat food if you also make and eat food" and ever since then ive just started incorporating more pacts into my life. stay hydrated pact. stretch break pact. stop doomscrolling and go to bed pact. we need to bring this back in vogue more people should be making pacts imo

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the best part of this is when you ask "who wants to do a shower pact" and you get a half dozen friends all rolling up saying "the pact is sealed". faustian behavior

i hope all those guys on reddit/steam that claimed they’d kill astarion on sight are having a real fun time opening all these doors. this motherfucker is sitting on a +17 bonus to sleight of hand. the world is his oyster. he never met a door he couldn’t open.

My "good ending sweetheart not sad babe" bg3 playthrough is going to be with a drow circle of spores druid who was orphaned (in the underdark) when she was young, and taken in by myconids. She would venture further and further out as she grew up and eventually ended up leaving the underdark entirely in her travels.