Wizard Tip #12: Cast “Rude Gesture” Any Time Someone Asks You “Why Are You Doing That”

Wizard Tip #12: Cast “Rude Gesture” Any Time Someone Asks You “Why Are You Doing That”

Chore Scorpion: I come from the toughest meanest place you can imagine. I want to be gentle, I want to die gently, but It seems that when life gets hard I have to get harder to match.

this is like, the spiritual opposite of the Kafka bug

when your pet comes to you from another room, the preceding moments meant that they were alone somewhere and thought about YOU, an animal brain literally thought about you and came to you to see what you were doing. that’s love, unconditional.

Sleep paralysis demon but he’s, like, actually a cool guy. Asks if you’re doing alright when he first spots you planted face down on the mattress. Turns you around gently and sits on the edge of the bed so you feel more in control, seeing who's speaking to you. How long does this usually last? Ten minutes? Dude, that’s tough. Wanna hear some demon jokes while we wait for this to be over? Oh, right, you can’t laugh. My bad.

And every time you wake up in this state, he’s there, trying to make you feel better. Tells you about what he had for breakfast so you get bored and fall back asleep. Scratches your itches. Feels your aura of fear during the first few moments, and rushes close to assure you that everything’s alright.

The sad part is once the paralysis wears off, he’s gone, too.

I really cannot emphasize enough the mental health benefits of abandoning the idea that you're special.

This goes both ways, both "You don't have to do everything singlehanded" and "You're not uniquely awful."

This is something I came to grips with as part of years of recovering from PTSD and it was so, so important. Realizing that the worst thing in my life has also happened to so many other people was at first disappointing because I wanted to be special to give my suffering meaning. Then I realized that my suffering isn't what makes me special or interesting. And once I let go of needing to be special, I started paying attention to all the ways other people enrich my life and just became happier.

my interpretation of franz kafka's metamorphosis :3 😋😍

Guys do u know that one meme where there's a girl and like a bodyguard (???) ordering drinks and the waiter give them the wrong drinks so they switch them on the last panel,???????? BECAUSE I C1NT FING IT^

I FUCKIBG GOT IT RAAAAAHHHHHHH 💥💥💥💥💥

quick tutorial on how I shade with solid black (a lot of people ask, hope this helps)

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i saw a really cool butterfly expert man on PBS and was so in awe of him and his butterfly knowledge i tracked down the episode online to see how to spell his name and found his twitter and followed him, only for the next day to awaken to him having read not only my webcomic, but also my livetweets saying how i wanted to marry the butterfly man. he said he was flattered. anyway the moral of the story is please don’t underestimate how far down your twitter a bored entomologist will scroll, and also the internet was a mistake.

the fuck you lookin at keep scrollin

they wanted him dead for his sad brown eyes and his slut waist

The Mountain hare/skogshare reminds you of the importance to wash your feet, including between your toes!

When u autistic and sober up in the middle of the club and you feel like

I feel like so much slur discourse could get solved by discussing intent. “I’m okay with faggot but don’t like when someone yells it out a car at me.” Yeah no shit. I like physical touch in the form of a hug but don’t like it when it is in the form of a punch. People have said the word “gay” “lesbian” “trans” what have you with the most hateful vitriol they can muster because they MEAN it like a slur. So many of us have heard the tone that may as well make the word a slur.

If I saw a sign that says “I hunt members of the LGBTQIA+ community for sport” it wouldn’t really feel different from “I want to kill faggots.”

Additionally, I LIKE that it makes people cringe. It used to make me cringe. Those words have history for me too. But they also are not able to be sanitized by corporations. Shitlibs who would never rock the boat to protect me are never going to NOT shrink away at me calling myself a dyke and I do not care.

MY intent IS vitriol back, sometimes. A bold statement of attack. But sometimes it’s a joke. “His faggy mannerisms have captivated me.” Sometimes it’s a badge of honor from older queers. Sometimes it’s not that deep. What’s behind the words, what the intent is is everything.

Teachers have tried this and are amazed when their classes don’t go feral like in the book.  It’s almost as if the book was supposed to be satire and not a treaty on the nature of humanity.

there’s a timeskip

THERE’S A TIMESKIP

THERE’S A TIMESKIP

THERE’S A TIMESKIP

after losing control of the signal fire there’s a FUCKING TIMESKIP and when the next chapter starts everyone’s hair is several inches longer and their clothes have rotted to shreds and they’re still just kind of chilling!!!!

IT TAKES THE TERRIBLE IMPERIALISM MIND-POISONED EXCESSIVELY BRITISH BOYS IN THE ACTUAL BOOK SEVERAL MONTHS TO COMMIT A SINGLE ACT OF INTENTIONAL VIOLENCE, EVEN THE ONE (1) CHILD WRITTEN AS AN ACTUAL SOCIOPATH

AND then when they DO turn on each other it is because

THERE’S AN UNSPECIFIED WORLD WAR HAPPENING

AND A PILOT’S CORPSE CRASH LANDS ON THE ISLAND POST-DOGFIGHT AND THE CHILDREN MISTAKE THE PARACHUTE FOR A MONSTER AND SPIRAL INTO PARANOIA

BECAUSE CHILDREN INHERIT THE LEGACY AND TRAUMA OF VIOLENCE FROM THE ADULTS WAGING WAR AROUND THEM

HURR DURR IN THE REAL WORLD IT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN LIKE IN LORD OF THE FLIES -

IT DIDN’T HAPPEN THAT WAY IN LORD OF THE FLIES EITHER YOU JUST HAVEN’T READ IT SINCE HIGH SCHOOL IF EVER AND DON’T REMEMBER WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED IN THE GODDAMN BOOK

#tbf the dude wrote it to be a dick

yes. yes he did. i’m also gonna direct you to the real life ‘lord of the flies’ which occured in the 1960s, when six tongan schoolboys got stranded on a desert island for over a year before being rescued by an australian fisherman (who, it should be noted, later took on all six as crewmembers because the reason they were out in the first place was because they wanted to see the world, and named his ship the Ata after the island they were stranded on). nobody died. the only injuries that occurred were accidental, and when one of the boys broke his leg falling down a cliff, the others braced it and looked after him so well that it healed perfectly. if they argued, then they would literally go to opposite sides of the island until they’d cooled off. after leaving the island, they remained friends for the rest of their lives. here’s a photo of them as adults, with their rescuer (who is third from the left) and other members of his crew.

i read about this in rutger bregman’s human kind, a book i cannot recommend highly enough, but if you don’t want to go and read a whole book about the inherent goodness of humanity (which again, you really should) then the relevant excerpt can be found here.