there is honestly no nicer place than a cool temp room and the thickest comforter. i feel like a small bear who only comes out for berries
comedies that turn into tragedies when the fucked up stuff played for jokes suddenly gets treated with the severity and realness that it would get in real life are genuinely my weakness and hit so much harder than tragedies that start off with the sad stuff.
like not only is the audience caught in the whole "boiling the frog" thing with the comedy slowly become a tragedy but it reveals that the characters are as well; that the previous comedy was only perceived as a comedy because the characters had no clue that what they were going through was not normal and just lighthearted fun. the audience realizes it as the characters do, making them both more sympathetic and their arcs all the more tragic as you look back on what previously happened.
I love these two so much.
Credit: @jellymlk on twitter
it's always "don't repeat the cycle" and "beware of the cycle" and never How was the cycle was it fun to be in the cycle
Daughter of fantasy villains decides to rebel against her parents by actually going through with her arranged marriage to a local golden retriever of a prince instead of running off with some local villain-to-be or conquering said golden retriever’s kingdom and ruling it solo like her parents expect her to. Plus, sue her, she’s into the clean-cut earnest look.
At the same time, local prince charming discovers that he’s actually very into the gothic fiance his parents have landed him with in order to try and establish peace with the local evil lair down the lane, he would never have guessed a spiderweb pattern could look so fetching on a ball gown…?
Meanwhile, two pairs of parents in a tizzy because they both expected their offspring to whole-heartedly reject this union and give them an excuse to conquer their goody-two-shoes/evil neighbours, they’re not supposed to actually like each other-!
respective friend groups undergoing culture clash like all of prince charming’s knights are like what vile spell has been used to ensorcel our prince. we must be on our guard for surely this is but a ruse for an assassination attempt
meanwhile the villain bride’s friends are all like clearly he loves you not, why do you persist in a manner that will ensure your own heart break, i mean if he was taking this seriously there would be at least three assassination attempts by now. it’s like he doesn’t even notice that you have massive amounts of dark power to covet for his own
smashcut to
fully armored knight, clanging through the hallways in attempts at stealth, blades drawn: i’m just saying, i took an oath of protection. this feels wrong.
prince charming: it’s not wrong, it’s celebrating cross cultural traditions for my beloved bride
knight: it’s attempted murder
prince charming: it’s a loving attempted murder
@chucktaylorupset Meanwhile the bride has a bouquet of roses, cornflowers, and wheat sheaves on her desk in her room, and she’s not coming out until she’s written a beautiful and moving poem about how they favourably compare to her groom. It’s been three days. She’s gone through an entire raven’s worth of quills (unethically sourced). The ‘toads who used to be my friends’ list has gone up by one. But she’s bent dark forces and eldritch spirits to her will and, by the powers obscene, this will not be the thing that breaks her.
Sorceress friend: Please, just get him an amulet that will double his power at the cost of his soul, no one’s worth this.
Rebellious villainess: (nearly in tears) No, he brought his best knights to the castle and tried to kill me last week, at midnight, I can’t ignore something like that! He even kicked Cathulhu!
Sorceress friend: He nudged it with his foot. And then he apologized to it. In tears.
Rebellious villainess: (actually in tears now, for reasons of feels instead of poetic torment) He’s trying so hard!!!
love living during the 3rd Red Scare, the 2nd Lavender Scare, and the 2nd Satanic Panic all at the same time. the political right is so normal and not unhinged at all
thinking about that one brony tumblr blog that hated homestuck for some pretty legitimate reasons and kept getting asks/anon hate mail arguing with him and harassing him to read it because he's a brony so what the hell does he know about good media apparently and then he eventually begrudgingly did a live blog where he hate-read the webcomic, but in a stunning turn of events after like 2000 pages of "jesus fucking christ this shit is garbage" he started forming opinions and preferences about it and then ended up becoming a legitimate fan by the end. anyway that was our universe's dirk strider
*coughing blood and covered in wounds, on one knee, gripping my sword planted on the ground… And yet, smiling* Heh… And yet, despite everything… *I start glowing with mysterious power* I stay silly!
the camera focusing on Kendall at the end of Shiv's sentence when she says Logan was hard on women and "couldn't hold a whole woman in his head" right after we saw Kendall eulogize Logan as having "created" his three children to the erasure of his own mother (also noted by the camera focusing on Caroline's reaction). and right after we saw Kendall threaten Rava and intimidate his kids and make moves to take the kids from her. and right after we saw him attack Jess and call her stupid for wanting to quit and blaming her for telling him on the day of his dad's funeral when he's the one who made her tell him that day. and right after we saw him help try to steal an election for a fascist who undoubtedly as part of his platform wants to criminalize women's bodily autonomy (one of the reasons Jess wants to quit).......... goddamn. the cycle of abuse and the father-to-son inheritance of refusing to even conceptualize that women are real.
logan's mausoleum having space for all of their bodies to be entombed.. they'll all be trapped forever in a room with an angry man
If I'm being honest with you Karin I've been high ever since 9/11 and I don't see that changing any time soon
AITA for being annoyed my client/host threw my only mirror out of a window?
I (22M) am a solicitor and currently staying at a client’s castle in Transylvania. As I was shaving this morning my client (??M) grabbed my mirror, got mad at me for bleeding, called the mirror a “foul bauble of man’s vanity” and threw it out of the castle window. I was annoyed and was going to say something but then I noticed he was making my bed even though he says he has servants(?? I have yet to see one)
Edit: is it strange that I didn’t see his reflection in the mirror??
in junior year of highschool my art teacher would let our ceramics class play music of our choice off of her desktop. we usually used spotify or youtube but she did have one album downloaded on her computer. it was a halloween sound effects/ambience collection. i dont remember why she had it. there was a track on there called "burning screams" which was exactly what it sounds like. just a cacophony of screams alongside crackling fire. she only let us play it on very special occasions, and we would cheer and jump with joy every time. it was like a pizza party to us
please imagine 6 teenagers with giant sad puppy eyes looking at a dear sweet 50 something year old art teacher and asking "may we please hear burning screams"
i dont know where burning screams came from. ive looked. its lost media to me. burning screams is my white whale
Track 3 "Burning Screams" on "Scary Sounds of Halloween"
I wanna be monetised soooo badly I want a brand sponsor more than anything in this world so help me god. but Manscaped arent returning my calls anymore about the tester ad I send them. They said that "I'm gagging for manscaped cock" isn't an on-brand message for them and they dont want to be associated with it. Well the jokes on them because I dont even like bald cock and nor does anyone else. Have fun knifing your nuts.