GOOD OMENS GRAPHIC NOVEL STRETCH GOALS!

We saw a lot of people asking for a bookmark stretch goal for all tiers, including Nightingale and Human, so at £1.5m, you'll get it! We're dotting the 'i's and crossing the 't's on some later stretch goals and more items but they will be well worth the wait.

Visit the Kickstarter.

(source)

This looks like a shitpost but it’s actually solid advice, like, if you want to achieve a goal you have to pace yourself and be patient instead of expecting too much too soon and then giving up

Normies talking about getting whiplash from recipe blogs. You know nothing

[ID: An AO3 author’s note reading, “Sorry for vanishing, I did a little too much research on cults an coercive control for Damian’s arc, and then realized I was raised in a cult, and THEN I ran away to a fishing town cabin on the other side of the country and had to start learning to be a person in the real world. I also forgot how to write. But I’m learning again, so I’m back now! Have some more.” The “I” in “I was raised in a cult” is emphasized by sparking emojis, and the note is ended with heart emojis. /end ID]

Aaaand THIS is one of the many reasons why it’s not only not a bad thing to portray dark subject matter, but EXTREMELY IMPORTANT to do so!! You can learn a lot when writing, and others can learn a lot when reading! This can save lives, dudes.

A BEAR ATE MY BEST HUMMINGBIRD FEEDER.

Rude.

Someone tell that bear he's not supposed to eat that with the skin on.

I live in South Africa. And if you live in South Africa and you have any contact with people from the US or Canada you might have run into a question about wildlife like lions and elephants roaming our streets. Most South Africans get pretty offended by questions like this. We are a civilized country, our large and dangerous wildlife gets contained in properly fenced parks. 

I use to get offended by this until I visited a few places in Canada and realized that the reason why you ask is that some of your large and dangerous wildlife does simply roam the countryside and sometimes make excursions into town.

This honestly blew my mind. What do you mean, you have bears just walking around? What the hell? 

north americans don't all encounter deadly megafauna on our porches and front lawns but it happens often enough that we all think this is a reasonable amount of gigantic animal to happen to your house. so when we think of africa we kinda imagine it like this:

like. if we had elephants here. this is what we would be putting up with on the regular. what do you mean you guys are more sensible than us.

My friend’s grandmother lives in a town where when hunting season, in the fall, starts, ALL the deer in the area move into the downtown because they’ve figured out that people can’t hunt there. And there will just be deer walking around the town with their babys in the spring/ summer because it’s safer there I guess? Both times I went with my friend there the deer were chilling in the park, front lawn, the deck, the boardwalk, EVERYWHERE.

A BEAR ATE MY BEST HUMMINGBIRD FEEDER.

Rude.

Someone tell that bear he's not supposed to eat that with the skin on.

I live in South Africa. And if you live in South Africa and you have any contact with people from the US or Canada you might have run into a question about wildlife like lions and elephants roaming our streets. Most South Africans get pretty offended by questions like this. We are a civilized country, our large and dangerous wildlife gets contained in properly fenced parks. 

I use to get offended by this until I visited a few places in Canada and realized that the reason why you ask is that some of your large and dangerous wildlife does simply roam the countryside and sometimes make excursions into town.

This honestly blew my mind. What do you mean, you have bears just walking around? What the hell? 

north americans don't all encounter deadly megafauna on our porches and front lawns but it happens often enough that we all think this is a reasonable amount of gigantic animal to happen to your house. so when we think of africa we kinda imagine it like this:

like. if we had elephants here. this is what we would be putting up with on the regular. what do you mean you guys are more sensible than us.

Few weeks ago there was a black bear casually roaming the suburbs with local news casually reporting on it, while surrounding cities were like "Hang on, there's bears that close to DC?" Bear was caught and relocated. Casually.

The ones that really freak me out isn’t listed above: alligators and crocodiles.

There’s tons of them along significant stretches of the US and they just kinda... wander around sometimes.  And I mean, what are you going to do to stop them?  Put up a fence?

Good luck!

Every time I see a bunch of posts from Neil Gaiman on my feed I think, "Neil... you're procrastinating writing again, aren't you"

Neil.

Listen up!

'i don't want to see a man wearing exposing clothing and striking a feminine pose' WELL I DO‼️‼️‼️

licherally cannot explain to adults these days that im actually so cool with the idea of being “just an employee” somewhere as long as i am paid enough to live comfortably and i also like the job. “but dont you want to be rich?? dont you want to always be striving for more???” like that sounds EXHAUSTING and i like having friends so

and like. i kinda have weird feelings abt fetishization bc like ok.

i hooked up with a queer person who used all the right language and did all the right things, but then they told me they only date ppl who were afab, regardless of gender. they’ll fuck ppl who were amab but they won’t date them, only afab ppl. the further we got into the convo, it became clear that the reason they only wanted to date ppl who were afab is bc we are more likely to have been socialized to take on the brunt of the domestic and emotional labor in relationships. that hookup ended up lasting over an hour bc they kept interrupting sex to complain about their ex wife. by the end i was practically shoving them out the door because i was so uncomfortable.

the guy i’m hooking up with right now is very cis and found me through the ftm tag on grindr, so he was specifically looking for trans guys. he told me he’s into trans guys because he likes sleeping with masculine people, mostly men, but he also likes the way vaginas feel. could that be seen as fetishistic? sure. does it feel that way to me when we have sex? nope. he uses gender affirming language without even being asked, he tells me he’s super into my body and gets excited when he notices that i’ve grown more hair or had a t dick growth spurt. he likes my body because it’s trans, and i’m perfectly okay with that.

i felt so much more fetishized by the queer person who was actively seeking out afab ppl to take advantage of essentially patriarchal trauma than i ever have by the guy who just likes trans pussy. so i feel like we just really need to have a conversation about what it actually means to fetishize someone because it very much feels like it’s just become “thinks trans ppl are hot” and i hate that literally other trans ppl are scared of finding other trans ppl hot for fear of fetishizing. trans ppl are fucking hot! our trans bodies are hot! it’s okay to be sexually attracted to trans bodies!

THIS. This this this, a thousand times this.

I personally think that a lot of people have decided that "being attractive to something non-normative" = "fetishizing" which... Is just blatantly not true. But it's how you end up with people who think that someone who is explicitly (and perhaps only) attracted to trans/genderqueer bodies is an evil fetishizer instead of, you know. Someone who likes that kind of body. Same vein of thinking as people who think that those who are attracted to fat people are all chubby chasers with a fat/feeding fetish instead of just people who find fat bodies attractive.

Like imo? There is no fucking difference between saying "Oh yeah, I really like guy pussy" and "I really like big dick and muscles." It's just what you like, and I hate that when someone expresses that they like something that is seen as "not normal"- not a straight, cis, white, abled, thin body, people act like it's a fetish or it's objectifying. Because what that says, at least to me as a fat genderqueer transmasc, is that being attracted to me as I am is inherently not normal and not good. And that is a fucking SHITTY message to send.

The problem with trans chasers and chubby chasers and "fetishizers" (and honestly, people really need to like, read up on what a fetish is because I'm sick of seeing it used as some bad thing all the time, it's not) is that they treat people as not whole people. Whether, as in the example above, they take advantage of actual or perceived trauma and behavior associated with one's assigned gender, or as a personal example, they're only interested in sleeping with you because they've "never fucked a fat chick and hear that you girls give awesome head". People who do that shit see the people they go after as experiences or novelties, or as something exotic. A sex object that they can use.

Whereas someone who is just into trans bodies, fat bodies... They just like those bodies. And they will treat you as a whole person. You're not a sexual toy to them- you're a person that they think is hot, that they want to sleep with. They care about you and your body and what you need. Again, it's no different than someone who dates people with brown eyes or cool dyed hair because they find those things attractive. It's just "this is what I look for physically in a partner".

'#i genuinely really like this post#because it is always difficult for me to acknowledge that i do have preferences due to this sort of thing#are they strong ones? no. but just the fact that they exist doesn't meant that i'm fetishizing something!!#however my brain and american purity culture are both mean' will smith gesturing meme goes here

reblog for a larger sample size pls etc etc i'll pass u a strawberry 🫶🏽

there is. lizard in the house. what is the polite way to deal with this situation?

i am lacking in social niceties. what are the rules of hospitality in this particular circumstance? truly I've no wish to be rude

I guess maybe trap them under a cup and put them outside?

attempted to diplomatically put forth this suggestion, at which point negotiations broke down. the lizard has scampered, and is currently hiding either within or behind the closet. tumblr please instruct on proper protocol

Sofia the First is so funny because it’s a kid’s Disney Jr Show for sure, but it’s like. Got so much going on. Like not just in the usual ‘be kind learn and grow’ way but like, all these 8 year olds are gonna grow up like “Well Mom actually I think the British Monarchy is in the wrong and should give back the royal jewels — it doesn’t matter if it’s important or been a long time. When Sofia found out the harvest crown actually had been taken by her family decades ago from the gnomes, she immediately just gave it back and apologized deeply for what they’d done even though they had their own centuries of tradition with it, because it wasn’t theirs, and brokered new social peace and cooperation between their communities and-”

why is this so funny

Okay I’m currently furious that migraines are often so blindly easy to treat and I had to find this out myself at the age of 26 when I’ve been to a neurologist since I was 11 lol so I’m about to teach you two neat and fast little tricks to deal with pain!

The first is the sternocleidomastoid muscle, or the SCM muscle.

This big red section is responsible for pain around the eye, cheekbone, and jaw, as well as some temple pain. Literally all you have to do is angle your head down a little, angle it away from the side that hurts, and then you can gently pinch and rub that muscle. I find it best to start at the bottom and travel upwards. The relief is so immediate! You can increase pressure as you feel comfortable doing so.

Here is a short and easy video showing this in action

The second is a fast and easy stretch that soothes your vagus nerve, which is the nerve responsible for calming you down. The vagus nerve, for those unfamiliar, is stimulated by deep breathing such as yawning, sighing, singing, or taking a deep breath to calm your anger in a tense situation.

You can stretch this out by sitting up as straight as possible (this does not have to be perfect to work) and interlacing your fingers. Put your hands on the back of your head with your thumbs going down the sides of your neck and, while keeping your face forward, look all the way to one side with just your eyes. Hold that until you feel the urge to breathe deeply or yawn, or until you can tell there’s a change. Then do the same thing on the other side. When you put your arms down, you should clearly be able to turn your head farther in both directions. If the first session doesn’t get rid of your migraine, rest and repeat as many times as necessary. I even get a little fancy with it and roll my eyes up and down along the outer edge sometimes to stretch as much as I can.

If you need a visual here’s a good video on it. I know some of the language they use seems questionable but this is real and simple science and should not be discarded because it’s been adopted by the trendy wellness crowd!

I seriously cannot believe I didn’t hear a word of this from any doctor in my life. Additionally, if you get frequent recurring migraines, you may want to see a dietician. Migraines can be caused by foods containing histamines, lectin, etc. and can also be caused by high blood pressure in specific situations such as exercise, stress, and even sex.

If any of this information helps you I’d love to hear it btw! It’s so so fast and easy to do. Good luck!

*currently suffering from a horrible migraine. Tries this*

Are you fucking shitting me it works!?

@thebibliosphere I don't know if it'll help, but it may be worth looking into.

This is something my magic physio man also taught me. It helps if your migraines are triggered by muscle tension. Not so much if you have other root causes like OP mentioned above.

I give anyone reading this permission to use my grave to lie to cops

If I read something on the asks that feels genuinely threatening or dangerous, or that's actually abusive, I just delete it and block the person.

If I'm answering an ask here you can assume that as far as I'm concerned even if it's apparently threatening or angry, it's meant humorously or with love.

It's never appropriate to dogpile people. Never appropriate to threaten or abuse them, even if you think you are doing it for me and with the best of intentions. Don't.

If you are upset on my behalf, or on behalf of all Tumblr users, just think "this is probably a tone-deaf attempt at humour" and let it go.

Reblogging because I'm seeing people upset or offended on my behalf. To repeat, If I'm answering an ask here you can assume that as far as I'm concerned even if it's apparently threatening or angry, it's meant humorously or with love.

If I think something is actually unpleasant or bad, I'll just block them.

Don't dogpile on my behalf. I don't want you to, I think it's actively a bad idea, and it's bullying. (Remember: it can still be bullying when more than one of you turn up, even when you think you're in the right or the aggrieved party.)

Play nice, never attribute to malice what can easily be attributed to internet-caused text-based tone-deafness or misinterpretation, and everyone will have an easier time.

not joking I would kind of like to brutally murder whoever thought it was a good idea to take away clicking on a person’s name to see their reblog and make it borderline impossible to get to the original version of a post without spending ten minutes scrolling with ctrl f

Helpful tip:

If you have the post date option turned on you can click the date and it will take it to the original post like before. It's annoying, unintuitive, and harder to click but it should work on mobile or desktop

this is the most ridiculous possible workaround thank you SO much tumblr user suffusionofyellow for sharing

On IOS mobile I just click the blank space next to the user name and it brings me to the reblog