#on one hand i am deeply offended at meghan markle being lumped in with vile wallis simpson #but on the other hand this is hella funny

Straight women: LITERALLY EVERYONE IS ATTRACTED TO THIS MAN! EVEN LESBIANS WOULD HAVE SEX WITH HIM

The man:

he do be looking kinda fresh doe

He do be looking like fresh dough doe

you ever dip your entire oreo in milk except for the part where youre holding it and feel like thetis dipping newborn achilles into the river styx leaving him invulnerable everywhere except for his heel

I was walking around my neighborhood and saw a bunch of police surrounding a small house for a drug bust. As I got closer, I heard the policemen barking aggressively, so naturally I was like, wtf??? And one of them caught my eye and said, “Oh, we’re trying to scare them out of there,” and minutes later a bunch of furries came out the house whimpering and shit.

please sign your posts with your url i refuse to be continuously terrified of humanity by them

Damn good submission from @babydeermilk

Actually, he’s only a himbo if he’s from the Himbeaux region of France.  Otherwise he’s just a sparkling dumbass

Y’all ever wish your only responsibility was taking care of a small vegetable garden

i dont want traditional burial i want to become a bog body

this is threatening!!

Uh..

Someone please explain wtf with wrong with all the animal faces in the Mowgli thing on Netflix?  Trying to put human features on them makes it SUPER uncanny fucking valley and nightmare fuel.  

THIS IS NOT HOW YOU CAT THIS IS

2016 movie looked so much better…what happened!? Sorry, I’m browsing netflix and everytime that trailer comes out, I twitch.

I just… all i can think of… is…

Bottom left stovetop burner stans make some noise

*epidemic of porn bots breaks out due to tumblr’s own negligence*

tumblr staff:  We will fix it (:

why dippin dots always at obscure places. never just at the store. just wondering

all the white gays making fun of her is really so funny to me cuz like…this is what yall sound like sis. that’s your sister.