Small Calibrations

Oh hell yes 🙌🏾 👑

For the record, this was me in 2007.

I am not the toddler.

Man, I'd almost forgotten about the pixie-cut era. (It wasn't on purpose. I got the absolute WORST professional haircut of my life going somewhere new for my bob, and the only way to fix things was to cut everything off. I kept it for a few months, got bored, and by 2010, my hair was down to my waist again. Then I went back to a bob for a bit on a whim. It's the circle of life, only me and my hair. Currently, we're in the "how long can it get before I get sick of it?" part of the circle. It's just a couple of inches above my hips.)

I remember when that toddler was still a toddler-to-be named Princess Tickybox. It's so wild they're a proper grown human now!

Yep! She's legally an adult! I have no idea how that happened, yet it did somehow. (I'm sure one of these days, she'll bring home a girlfriend to introduce to us, and then I'll feel really old. Right now, I can still lie to myself because she's tiny and has a total baby face and looks about five years younger than her age.)

it used to be 2007 you know

All the adults should put in the tags how old they were in 2007

Wait, so you’re telling me today’s the 4th? What’s next, the 5th? The minor fall? The major lift?

horrible news: in order for you to finish a wip, you have to work on that wip and not the 2543524 other wips you were brainrotting over instead of that one. more investigations at 7.

@strangelock221b asked:

I AM MERELY HOSTING THIS POLL. I DO NOT APPROVE, DISAPPROVE, VALIDATE, OR ENCOURAGE ANY RESULTS THAT MAY OCCUR. I AM NOT TO BE HELD RESPONSIBLE OR MADE LIABLE FOR ANY KIDNAPPINGS, MURDERS, CURSES, WARS, SHIPWRECKS, PLAGUES, DREAMS, SIEGES, OR OTHERWISE GRIM FATES THAT MAY BEFALL THOSE WHO CHOOSE TO VOTE HEREWITH.

Did you just throw the apple of Eris?

Vintage Platinum Star Sapphire and Diamond Ring

I'm like this at work. I do my best to stay nice and mild and just generally friendly. I do this because I just prefer to make things as easy as possible at work but also, as a femme-presenting person, I can't be a giant cunt without getting disciplined.

Cue one day when I was about to snap, and I asked my female boss to read an email I was about to send because I was five seconds from snapping, and she took out some of the meaner language, and I thanked her by saying, "I appreciate your help. I can't trust my instincts on politeness right now."

Which led a dude who worked across the hall to look up and go, "Oh, what? Do you have anger issues?" Like it was impossible I might.

My female boss and I cackled so long and loud he backed out of the room.

Oh, honey, you have NO IDEA

I am so very professionally personable that the one time I got vaguely pissed off on a call (I was still very professional, but more, err, firm, clipped, and cold?), everyone on it who worked with me on the regular was like, "holy fuck, how angry were you?" (and the people I was mad at had no damn clue, as they'd never been on calls with me before, and their office culture in that location defaults to what I was like on the call, but anyhow).

I call upon the fan fic writing gods to bless you with the perseverance to finish one of your unfinished drafts. 

May your fingers dance along the letters upon your device with ease, may the devil of distraction stay far from you, and may your work not need much editing.

I pass this blessing upon every fan fic writer out there.

As it came to me I give it to you.