How Am I Back Here

CAN YALL SEE MY VISION

I just found out VLC media player lets you do this????

It works in motion too!! Took me half an hour asdgfsadfghas

you didn't think i'd leave you behind, did you?

you grit your teeth and manage to send an important text. and what happens? the person actually responds. so now you have to brace yourself and do it all over again PLUS you have to bring yourself to read the response first too. it never ends.

Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!

Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.

Modern writing advice: Yes your protagonist should have flaws but ultimately we should root for them and like them from the beginning :)

Charles Dickens: Here is the worst ugliest rudest meanest nastiest bitch you’ve ever met in your life.

Modern writing advice: Make sure your POV character goes through a significant arc! Make sure they are changed by the narrative! Make sure they learn a lesson!

Narrators of every book of the 19th century: the lesson I learned is these people fucking suck, sayonara you freaks

Modern writing advice: It’s all about the character overcoming obstacles and learning! They learn their lesson so they can fix their mistakes and make good choices in the future! It’s a character arc! It’s called growth! Readers love it!

Everyone from ancient times through the 19th century: would you like to watch a Guy fuck up twenty times in a row

nothing fills you with greater false confidence than managing to wake up early once

can’t stop thinking about an iroh-and-zuko-never-leave-ba sing se au where zuko, having no other outlet for all his internalized perfectionism and single-minded drive to succeed at something, has no choice but to get really, really intense about the jasmine dragon.   and, perhaps inevitably, ends up mutating into the shouty, hypercritical, detail-oriented manager of every restaurant worker’s nightmares, who is a menace to iroh’s employees and potentially even more passionate about the right way to serve tea than even iroh himself.  

zuko runs the tea shop in the exact same way that he once ran a fire nation navy warship.  he WILL stand there and time you to make sure you’re brewing the oolong EXACTLY the right amount of time and won’t let you strain the chamomile a second too soon.  he insists that the tea blends are all stored according to his current pet organizational system and woe to the poor stock boy who mixes them up.  the store room is organized alphabetically one week and the next the teas are lined up from weakest to to strongest flavor and the week after THAT all the containers are shelved based on brewing time and zuko never bothers to tell the workers when the system is changed.  

the dishes MUST be cleaned according to his scrupulous standards of perfection and he stands over the dishwasher and points out every single smudge left unscrubbed.  zuko has posted a chart with detailed directions for exactly the right way to mop the floors and he WILL fire you for going off course.  the turnover rate at the jasmine dragon is incredible because zuko goes through tea servers faster than emily gilmore goes through maids.  

iroh has created a tea monster and he has NO idea how to stop him.  zuko has shattered a tea pot for no other reason than “it poured too loudly, uncle!!!”  no customer dares send their tea back even if they end up with the wrong order; they’ve all seen zuko take his dao swords out on a tea wholesaler who tried to cheat him.  when zuko says the jasmine dragon is going to be the best tea shop in ba sing se, it’s not a promise, it’s a THREAT.

It drives me insane how many people dont realise how often they break the law and that if the full force of it was ever applied life would basically be unliveable. Like between traffic violations, petty workplace theft, account sharing and piracy alongside how common it is to have been in posession of some illegal drug at some point in your life. People still manage to get away with thinking "criminals" are people who commit crimes not just populations that are surveilled enough to be routinely prosecuted

Remus, in a room with Sirius, James, and Peter: It’s calm in here. Remus: It scares me…

no context needed for this

God in jeans

Goncharov was special because not only did we establish canon, we created a whole fanon gay interpretation and proceded to ignore the (not even real) original in favour of it. And thats what tumblr is all about.

"next time i open up to somebody it'll be my autopsy, because im so sure i’ll die under suspicious circumstances.”

-regulus black

Executioner at Azkaban: Any last words? Sirius: Do you think I'm hot? Be honest.

there's something so compelling to me about the fact that sometimes leaving a blade or bullet inside the wound it made is the only way to prevent you from bleeding to death. something about the ironic symbolism of it. when the thing designed and intended to kill you is the only thing keeping you alive.

also yes i do enjoy a bit of penetration imagery and the perverse intimacy of violence. if you must know.

it's rotten work, but without the rot nothing can grow

it's rotten work but decay is an essential part of the cycle of death and rebirth

pour one out for all those fic readers who found one author who wrote one really good fic for their fandom then clicked on their profile to find they wrote exactly one fic for that fandom and the rest for, like, csi or something