My new fave picture of Kian ❤

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Why can't you see? || Jc Caylen

Pairing: Jc and female reader Requested? in a way, yes Warnings: mentions of weight insecurity and self bashing..sorry !! it also gets slightly nsfw towards the end. wink wink Kinda hella long…. soz

a/n: this was good to write. i myself feel uncomfortable with my body so i tried my best. I think all bodies are beautiful, this in no way is meant to offend anyone. I’m sorry if it does offend you

-

Pain. Cringe. Uncomfortable. That’s what you felt every single time you looked at that girl staring back at you in the mirror.

You were standing in a pair of red pyjama shorts and a white tank top. Jc was downstairs somewhere and you were about to step in the shower but, you couldn’t help yourself. You had to look in the mirror. It wasn’t a cocky thing, the opposite actually. You turned to the side. You noticed how the backs of your thighs had cellulite. You saw your arms were slightly bigger than other girls. You hated that. You placed a shaking hand on your squishy stomach, and pulled up the tank top. Now facing the mirror, you looked at your stretch marks, your thighs. You tried to breathe in really hard to make your collar bones visible, but nothing happened.

This has become a routine. Each day, you stared into the mirror, hoping that something would change. It’s not like you ate junk, you were actually perfectly healthy and went to the gym every now and then by yourself.

You just, were always so insecure. Constantly wearing baggy clothing and anything that would keep you covered, even then you still felt exposed. It wasn’t fair, you thought. All you wanted, was to be different. All you wanted, was to be somebody else. You used every birthday wish, shooting star and every time you saw 11:11 on the clock to wish that you weren’t you.

The only people you felt most comfortable with was your best friend Andrea and boyfriend Jc. That was it. You just couldn’t face the embarrassment of showing yourself to someone again. Even still, with Jc you wore a tshirt during sexy times, or only went topless when the lights were off.

You and Jc have been dating for almost two years. You felt awful, he wanted to touch you and see all of you and love you, and it’s not like you don’t trust him. Of course you do. You just weren’t ready for it. You didn’t want to see his reaction when you took your shirt off, so you avoided it completely.

However, only recently fans have been giving you hate. Horrible hate. Of course they mainly targeted your weight and the fact that you are not Lia. Comments were seen each day that said ‘Lia is prettier’ ‘Why would he leave Lia for her? Jesus Christ’ ‘she’s a whale’ ‘she’s just fat. And ugly. He can do better’ 'bring back Jia’ What were you supposed to do? You lived in constant fear that one day Jc would just get fed up with you not opening up to him and go back to her.

Lia was the opposite of you. You weren’t going to deny it. She was blonde, tall, thin, yet curvy in a sense. She was tan, beautiful face and everything you could wish to be. She wore outfits like crop tops and short shorts, or jeans. She was perfect in your eyes.

You completely snapped out of your thoughts when you heard a light cough coming from the doorway. You jumped and pulled your tank top back down over your stomach, smoothing out your cloths and grabbing your robe to cover yourself. You looked at Jc standing there, his arms folded and his hands tucked tightly under his armpits. His hair was a mess from the night before, he was shirtless and in black sweatpants.

He chuckled “so this is what you’ve been doing all morning?” You let out a forced, yet convincing laugh and walked from the bathroom into the bedroom you both shared. You focused on the patting sound of your feet on the carpet, rather than how much your cheeks were blushing and the fact that you had just been caught basically half naked thinking about how much you didn’t like yourself.

Jc made sure to follow you. He sat down on the bed next to you and watched you carefully. Neither of you said anything. He was still getting used to your insecurities, he knew there wasn’t much he could do rather than support you and try to take your mind off of things. He placed his hand on your knee and finally spoke up. “Hey.. Hate getting to you again?”

You shrugged in response. “I guess, kinda. I was just getting ready for the shower..” You trailed off, not daring to meet his concerned gaze. “You were looking at yourself and crying babe. I was standing there for a while. You were just very deep in thought” he spoke, kissing your head. you snapped up to look at him. Your insides churning at the thought of him seeing your stomach without you even noticing. You were always so self aware, so that theses types of things wouldn’t happen.

You stood up and started to grab your clothes for today. A red sweater and black ripped jeans, also red vans. You were about to walk away again until you felt his touch on your upper arm. He pulled you closer by your waist and chucked your clothes on to the large bed.

“I know it’s bothering you, the comparing. But just know, I love you okay? Everything they say is-” “True!” You cut him off as fast as you could. You harshly pulled yourself from his grasp. You never spoke about your insecurities to him much, and all the self hatred, anger and hurt was coming out right now.

“It’s true Jc! You and I both fucking know it’s true! You seriously can not look at me and say that I am beautiful! Because I am not! I’m bigger than Lia and every other fucking girl that’s ever fucking lived” you let out a loud groan.

He didn’t say anything. Tears were slowing slipping out of your eyes and his face immediately softened. “I’m so fucking huge, and no matter how hard I try I can’t lose weight- well I can it just takes forever or it doesn’t show anywhere! Do you know what I would give to not have to go the very back of a fucking clothes rack in a store looking for my size? I would kill, to be thin! To not have this ugly thing” you yelled- hands pointing to your stomach.

Jc’s heart broke with every word you said. He didn’t understand. You were so beautiful to him, and he loved every part of you. He just didn’t know why you couldn’t do the same. “Everybody wants me to be Lia! Every god damn day I hear shit about how I’m not her! And I am just waiting for the day when you get sick of my bullshit and my insecurities and go running back to her! I know you love her Jc. You might as well go back, at least you’ll have someone beautiful.” You mumbled. Hurt and pain was spilling from your words and a huge pang strung in your heart.

“Shut up y/n!” He snapped. He came towards you and before you knew it, your back was against the hard wall. “you don’t get to tell me who I do and don’t love! I don’t love Lia! I LOVE YOU! only you! God fucking damn it” he mumbled. He placed his hands on the wall beside your head. “Yes! Yes you are bigger! And I don’t fucking care. I don’t care” he breathed out, his warm, minty breathe hitting your face.

“Why can’t you see?” He questioned, almost painfully. “You’re so so beautiful. Every part of you. I don’t give a shit what you look like. I love you because you’re funny, and kind and loving and loyal and everything else that you are. I do love your body though. That’s a bonus” he adds, biting his lip and running his hands down your robe covered hips.

You try to speak but your words got chocked up in your throat. “Everything that you are. Everything that you believe in it made you. It made you.” He pressed his index finger softly on your breast bone.

“Baby” he whispered, leaning his nose against yours. He brushed some hair out of your eyes, a habit he had developed with you and pulled you closer to his body. He kissed your forehead and wiped some stray tears that had fallen from your sad eyes.

“I love you so much. I wanna see-” he kissed your neck, and started to undo the knot in your soft robe. “All of you” you got butterflies in your stomach and they flew all around your body, love coursing it’s way through your veins. He pushed the robe off your shoulders and smiled as it fell to the floor with a very quiet sound.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and you two had a full make out session. He pressed your back against the wall. He started to tug at the bottom of your tank top and instinctively your hands flew to stop him. He sensed your fear. “Please show me your body baby. I know it’s scary, but all I wanna do is love it. Stop me if you really don’t want to” He proceeded to pull the tank top off, leaving you bare chested. You wanted to cover yourself, but at the same time you just wanted to kiss him. He pulled back to look at you. He bit his lip once more and ran his hands down your lower back, coming round to your stomach, where they rested.

He pulled you closer to himself and whispered “mine” You couldn’t hold back the awkward laugh that left your mouth. Soon enough, your bare chests were touching each other and he took his sweatpants off, he was left in a pair of grey calvin kleins and you had to tighten your thighs to control the sensations you were having.

He kissed you once more, guiding you to the bed this time. He sat down on the edge and you stood between his open legs. You couldn’t help but widen your eyes at the bulge in his boxers. He started to pull your shorts off slowly with one hand. The other was gripping your hip quite hard.

You stood there, completely exposed. He looked you up and down and removed your hands that were covering your breasts and intwined them with his own. “I wanna try something- I wanna- can you ride me?” He started- looking up into your eyes, his head resting on your chest. You ran a hand through his hair. “I heard it will feel better for both of us”

“I’ll crush you though” you mumbled, releasing a small chuckle. Terror filling your body as your old insecurities came back, fear and embarrassment flooding your system. “No. None of that talk. You won’t crush me. I promise" he planted a small kiss on your collar.

You finally gave in. You knew he loved you. You could see it in his eyes and the way he tried to tug you closer to him. Nobody has ever showed you this much love before, and you didn’t want to miss out on it. So you thought 'fuck it. Why not’

Jc pulled off his boxers and you gently sat on his thighs. You closed your eyes as you leaned your full weight on him. He wouldn’t dare touch you until you were settled, he didn’t want to push you too much because he knew you were being brave. Slowly but surely you looked into his eyes and he smiled at you.

“You alright?” He chuckled and pulled you closer to him, as if that was possible right now. “See? Not crushing me” you just kissed him in response, right there in that moment, you didn’t care what you looked like, or what anyone else had to say. He was all over you, and you were all over him and you couldn’t get enough of him.

he pulled away from the kiss, you two were sitting upright, faces touching and still breathless from the previous kiss. “You ready?” He asked, looking into your eyes for some form of consent.

You nodded, and then he started. His head went straight back when you started moving. Back and forward, his skin hot on yours and a line of sweat forming on his forehead. “I’m sorry- if this - wasn’t as sexy as you were imagining” you half giggled half moaned.

“Of course it is. Don’t you dare stop because you think you’re hurting me. Because- holy shit- you’re not” he spoke, quickly in between moans.

He pulled you closer to him, gently grabbing your hair with one hand and keeping a tight hold on your hips moving you on him. He kissed you eagerly and ran his finger over your cheek. “I love you so much”

-

AUAGSIAB I hate !! writing / reading smut im so awkward lmao. Sorry if it’s bad…. Let ur imagination run wild!!

hot kian pics…. theres no such thing as not hot kian pics

gimme a taste of u || Jc Caylen

request it would be so cool if like you did an imagine with one of the guys and so the scenario is where you work at a random coffee shop or restaurant and the guys are eating there and one of the boys had a “love at first sight” teeny crush on you and so they purposely spill something or ask for assistance to get you to come to their table OR the guys do dares in a coffee shop/restaurant and one of them asks you a random question idkk

Word count: 200+

a/n: I hope this is sort of what you were looking for. X

8:00 am until 6:00pm. Everyday, 4 times a week. Your daily job had started to take over your life, but you loved it. You really did love it. Everyday you were told stories and gossip from the regular costumers you had come to know and love, you knew the place inside out. You never got tired of the coffee bean smell filling your nose and flowing through your body.

Your boss was the sweetest man the world could know. His name was Richard, he was quite chubby, tall and had short black hair. He was always throwing you praise at any chance he got. The two of you were the only ones working at the moment, the other employee had gotten fired for never showing up and stealing cookies from to counter. Every time you thought of that you couldn’t help but laugh.

-

So here you were. It was 8:17am. No customers yet. The windows were open and the air con was on, because in LA it was currently 112 degrees and frankly, you and easily sunburnt skin tone wouldn’t be able to handle that. You were wearing a short sleeve shirt and black shorts, with a pair of red converse. Of course you wore your apron, but Richard let you choose the uniform as long as it was appropriate. You started to prepare the kettle, the ice, the cups and everything else.

The radio was on, the sun was spilling through the windows and you were dancing behind the counter. Today was a good day. You didn’t even hear the first costumers coming in until you Richard was shouting for you. “y/n! costumers, love” he chuckled. You cringed at the thought of innocent people witnessing your awful dancing but just brushed it off with a giggle as you turned around to serve them.

“Sorry. Didn’t think people would be here so early. What can I get ya?” You said, confidently. In front of you were two boys. One with incredibly curly hair, tattoos and a small camera that he held close to his hip. The other, a gorgeous boy, with shaved hair, even more tattoos, a nose piercing and a wallet.

You noticed another 2 guys were sitting at the table nearest the far window, you couldn’t make them out but you assumed they were with these two. “Erm- hey! Can we get two cookies, three plain coffees and a strawberry smoothie?” The curly haired boy asked you. You thew him and his friend a smile and said “you sure can. Go sit down, I’ll bring it to you.” They nodded in return. You started to make their order.

[Jc’s p.o.v] we walked away and sat down. All I could think about was how the sun was shining against her face, her sweet voice and the beauty of her. I’d seen her a couple of times before, but only passing by the café. I’ve never actually come in until now.

Me, Kian, Dom and Harrison were making a vlog- video kinda thing so we decided to get coffee before we started our day.

“How gorgeous was she Kian? Holy shit" I whispered to him. He just looked back at the girl and smiled. I’d love to have just a taste of what she’s like. “yeah. She’s pretty hot. And nice, not rude like most workers in other cafés. I like her” he mumbled back. He was right.

She wasn’t like other girls I had seen.

She eventually brought us our food and drinks and God up close she’s so much more beautiful. Her eyes sparkle against the light. Her hair flows freely and her smile is one of the best I’ve ever seen. The way her dimples cave in at the side of her lip and her eyes light up that little bit more.

I couldn’t get enough of her. I needed her to come back and I needed to speak to her. I’d try anything.

[ur p.o.v]

After you served the boys, costumers started rolling in. Richard was busy with paper work and organising your pay-check for that month so he couldn’t do much to help you, you understood.

Everyone was finally served and the café got less busy. You were behind the counter just observing everything around you. The gorgeous curly haired boy and his friends were still here. There was a family, a mother and 3 kids. You could hear people chatting about their families, their work, their boyfriends or whatever, you weren’t that interested. You heard the clinking of glasses and laughter coming from the table with all the boys at it. You couldn’t help but stare at that curly haired one. He had a nice smile, and he was rocking a blue bandaid on his left cheek.

You eventually stopped staring at the poor boy and started to collect people’s empty cups and plates.

There was an older lady that was sitting alone, so you decided to go towards her. You already had plates in your hands so you didn’t plan on staying long, you just wanted to talk to her. “Hello. Everything tasting good here?” You pointed your head in the direction of her half eaten lemon muffin and empty cup of tea.

“Yes dear, I think that will do me for today. I like this place you know? I grew up here, it reminds me of my younger days” she let out a quiet chuckle. You couldn’t help but smile.

“That’s lovely. it is quite a nice area, do you reckon you’ll become one of our regulars? I’ve seen you here a couple of times you know” you threw her a grin. She smiled back and let out a satisfied sigh. “You know, I might come here every morning. Usually my daughter makes me tea in the morning but, she’s moved out now, and I don’t like being alone for too long. Don’t think it’s healthy for anyone” she started to poke through her bag and she pulled out a small wallet made of burgundy velvet.

You couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. “You know what? I’ll wrap that muffin up for you. You can take it home and if you fancy a nibble of something later and don’t feel like cooking- you’re sorted! Want me to go and get the cheque for you?”

Her face lit up instantly. “Thank you dear! That’s very kind of you. Yes please” you thew her another smile and took her plates and went on your way.

After collecting several more empty cups and plates, the café was empty. Except for the 4 boys. It was now 10:00am, they’ve been here for 2 hours. Ah well, they have laptops they’re obviously doing work.

You put the radio back on and started cleaning up, your feet were moving to the beat absentmindedly and you were lip syncing the words.

You were enjoying your time cleaning up until you heard 2 loud crashes and an “oh shit” escape someone’s lips.

You’ve got to be kidding me. You turned round and there was the curly haired boy standing in front of you with an awkward smile on his face and a pleading look in his eyes.

“Sorry. My friend Kian knocked down two of your cups. He’s fucking dumb, erm I just came here to say I’ll clean it if you want- it was our fault after all” you couldn’t help but smile. There was a very dark blush creeping up his cheeks and you chuckled in response.

You sighed and shook your head in a joking way. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll clean it, I was cleaning anyway. You owe me two cups though.” He laughed at your reply.

You walked towards his table and all the guys looked at you.

“Hey. Just here to clean up. Ignore me” You bent down and pick up the shattered white cup. There was cold coffee on the floor as well. You went and got a dustpan and swept the broken pieces into it.

The floor was clean. You stood up, wiped your hands on your knees and set the dustpan on their table. You noticed coffee all over the curly haired guys laptop so you gasped a little bit. Grabbing a tissue you wiped his keyboard down and mumbled “that’s gonna stain. Be careful next time okay? Don’t damage your expensive things” you threw him a smile, grabbed your things and went into the staff only room.

{3rd person view}

Jc was angry at himself. He could’ve said something but instead he just looked at her and didn’t say anything. He really liked this girl, and he has since the coffee shop opened. He had seen her through the window and in the local Walmart plenty of times. She was so beautiful to him, he just wanted to talk to her. Be her friend even, then they would fall in love and he would be happy.

He had to get her back to the table. He was so nervous, he saw her come back out and stand behind the counter on her phone. She was pouring a glass of water for herself and eating a muffin that she probably stole from the shelf, but it didn’t matter.

So jc knocked over another cup. To get her attention. Kian and the other guys looked at him, confusion plastered all over their faces. y/n just laughed from behind the counter “are you kidding me? You’re so clumsy” she giggled, setting down the muffin, she came over and collected the broken pieces once again.

Jc didn’t say anything that time either.

It wasn’t until they left he gained the courage. “You guys go on, I’m just gonna use the restroom, I’ll catch up with you” he said.

“Okay dude. Hurry up though”

This was it.

Jc waited until his friends were just about out of sight and he walked over to her. He looked at her name tag that was attached to her shirt. ‘y/n.’ He repeated it over and over again in his head. He would never forget it.

“Hey. I’m sorry about breaking your cups. Here” he held out a five dollar bill. “You already payed me, silly” she chuckled. “I know, but this is like, saying sorry. I didn’t mean to. Well- yeah I did- I no I didn’t I’m- fuck” he was stumbling over his words and the came out in a ball of confusion.

Y/n giggled at his awkwardness. “So, you dropped my precious cup on purpose did you? I still expect those cups you owe me by the way. That’s three now” she snickered.

“I’m so sorry. I really like you. Like a lot. And you’ll think I’m weird as shit but I just wanted to get your attention but I was too embarrassed to say something with my friends there, they would’ve made fun of me” Jc’s heart started racing faster and faster every time y/n looked into his eyes. And y/n, well her stomach was filling up with butterflies. “You’re jc right? I heard someone say that and I figured it was your name. I didn’t know” she smiled. “It’s a nice name. I’m y/n”

“I know. I saw your tag” he smiled. There was a short awkward silence between the two. Until y/n broke it. “you really like me? That’s sweet. Thank you"for the first time in a while, a blush spread across her cheeks and she felt good about herself.

"Erm yeah. I have for a while, I always see you around and stuff and you seem super cool.”

“All right, Jc. Gimme a taste of you.” She giggled. “I wanna get to know you. I’ll take your number and I’ll call you or text you tonight?” Well if that didn’t make Jc’s heart melt.

"Sure, of course yeah.”

-

they exchanged numbers and he actually ended up staying at the café for a while. Yes, people came in but not many. She could serve people and talk with Jc at the same time.

"Here you go Caylen” she said, handing him a steaming cup of coffee. “Here’s what you missed out on” they both chuckled. She sat down down with him and they laughed and talked for hours, she even showed him the rooftop of the café, a place she went at sunset with the café was closed and she could just take time to herself.

He told her about his YouTube career, and his friendship with Kian. She told him about her experiences at this café and about her boss Richard. She explained how kind he was.

-

By the end of the night they were talking as if they were best friends. y/n had that quality about her. She was funny, kind, carefree and easy going. It wasn’t awkward, it was fun.

“Well. I better get going, my kitten is gonna get hungry and Ill miss the last train."she giggled, fumbling with her keys.

"I’ll drive you.” He said, he wanted to. The longer he got to spend with her the better. Jc really felt like he had fallen head over heels. As cliché as it sounds, it could be possible. He just, never felt that way when he was with anyone before. Not even lia.

-

"Thank you so much Jc. I appreciate it. You still owe me my cups though” he laughed at her. Holding his hands up in defence he said “okay. Okay. I’ll get your cups back.”

“I might stop by tomorrow, grab a coffee, you know just by myself.” She couldn’t help but smile at the thought of him dropping the cups again.

She opened the car door and was ready to step out before turning to him. “Try not to break my cups this time. Or damage your laptop. Okay?” She had a hand on his cheek and she was chuckling. “Thanks for making my day at work a little less boring. I’ll see you tomorrow” her heart was beating in perfect time, her body felt still, and light in this moment. Just looking into his eyes. She leaned in and kissed his cheek.

He grabbed her face gently and kissed her on the lips. “ see you tomorrow” he smiled against her lips. She chuckled and got out of the car. “Call me in the morning, clumsy” she stuck her tongue out at him and he giggled. She shut the door and he watched her as she went into her apartment, making sure she was okay.

It was safe to say that when he got home, Jc never stopped smiling because when he looked at his phone, her name appeared on the screen above the text

‘I like you too, I never told you that today. Sorry’

😻💖 I’m in love