girl is that a 9/11 in your pocket. or is your penis just two ofd them and exploding
you just hate my 2 exploding penises.
His url used to be just "jim"
There are political newspaper comics that aren't this succinct
religious people: thank you god for inventing the accordion i love it soso much <3333
atheists: its seriously incredibly beautiful that people invent instruments like. someone came up with the idea for the accordion. howw.
agnostics: no one knows where the accordion came from
the problem is that pretty much all pride flags are horizontal, theres no vertical tricolours or anything
bisexual ireland
bireland
Trance
Breaking Bad could easily have an episode where Walter touches a crystal and it makes him seperate into multicolored different parts of his personality and Jesse has to try and put them back together
one time i went up to my friend (also my coworker) and gave him hug from behind and just like held him there for a moment and our one regular client walked in and was like “huh….so are you guys like….winnie the pooh and piglet?” and i lost my fucking mind. what does that mean. i also said yes and that i was pooh.
me and this coworker are now dating and the same client client came into today and was like “sooo winnie the pooh and piglet?” again so we asked him what he meant and apparently those were the only two male fictional characters he could think of that hug
winnie the pooh heritage post
guy creating a game: wow wouldn't it be fucked up to be locked up in a tiny dark room u cannot escape from kilometers under the sea. this sure is an awful way to die! good thing this doesn't happen in real life
random tech company:
society's infantilization of decorated objects is honestly one of the greatest recent crimes against humans' innate desire for beauty
"the toothbrush/hairbrush/bike/vanity desk with flowers on it is For Kids! this plain beige one is For Adults!"
I am literally throwing you into a volcano
british people call boypussy blokehole btw
These are also town names
If i die in ny aleep my message to da world is
Thank you women and-
*sees a bug outside my window*
You may think it cruel but when a white witch pisses me off I go through her etsy listings for native bird feathers and forward it to fish and wildlife services
Sweats in Salem witch descendant
Keep sweating girl the game wardens on his way
I’m literally giggling while reading that article about the Ryanair flight attendant saying welcome to Palestine while landing in Tel Aviv and like I know everyone on that plane was fuming
The whole cabin crew did not give a shit
