happy Thursday the 20th

I’d have to wait months or even years for another chance to reblog this, so why the fuck not?

next days you can reblog this on a Thursday the 20th

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August 2020

You know, just in case you wanted to set your queue for the next 6 years

TODAY

Next:

May 2021

January 2022

October 2022

April 2023

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June 2024

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November 2025

NEW VERSION NEW VERSION

I DIDN’T LEARN ABOUT THIS IN DRIVING SCHOOL

Stop says the red light, go says the green

Wait says the yellow light, twinkling in between. 

KNEEL, SAYS THE DEMON LIGHT WITH ITS EYE OF COAL  SAURON KNOWS YOUR LICENSE PLATE  AND STARES INTO YOUR SOUL

THIS IS ALWAYS FUNNY

@irritatedlifeguard I agree with your tags.

If you could delete one mainstream media movie/book/series/intellectual property from existence, entirely removing it from everyone's memory and cauterizing the timeline so it cannot reemerge, what would it be?

Mine would be Minions.

(Answers more interesting than JKR/Star Wars/MCU/GRRM are more fun. What PERSONALLY just makes you FURIOUS to have to look at it?)

GET KRONWALL’D

Amazing dominoes structure

god destroying the tower of babel

blargh... i want to make a post abt how phil uncanonizing being tommy’s dad doesn’t actually undo c!phils bad actions because the nature of the collaborative storytelling means that all the authors have to agree on what’s canon and act accordingly, so phil (not knowing what was canon) still acted the way he did knowing it was possible and even likely he was tommy’s dad (since they were still deciding on it until very recently). so like. phils bad parenting towards tommy is probably what made them decide he wasn’t his dad, NOT the other way around. therefore it “not being canon” now doesnt excuse any of that because it happened while it could’ve been canon? like phil was planning to be a bad dad regardless

also the way he acts to wilbur/ghostbur but that’s a whole nother can of worms and it’s late and i am too tired to be choherent or know if im making sense. am i making sense???

y'all I'm just scrolling thru tags rn and I keep seeing all these posts abt the Tommy being Phil's son argument, and it's hilarious to me bc I've made peace with the facts that a) regardless of whether Phil is TOMMY'S dad or not; hes still a shitty dad to Wilbur (by extension Tommy if the dynamic becomes canon), and b) if it does turn out to be truly canon, it won't matter to me ONE BIT bc There Are More Qualified People Worthy Of Being His Dad.

You want Tommy to have a good dad that won't abandon him the moment he's able to?Boom. Awesamdude is RIGHT there. So ignore Phil and his shitty parenting, and focus on good dad awesamdad, and his adorable dynamic w/ the clingy duo.

:)

/rp /dmsp

you can make nearly any object into a good insult if you put ‘you absolute’ in front of it

example: you absolute coat hanger

as well u can just add ‘ed’ to any object and it’s sounds like you were really drunk

example: i was absolutely coat hangered last night

#i was gazeboed mate #i was absolutely baubled

Meanwhile, “utter” works for the first (e.g., “you utter floorboard”) but somehow “utterly” doesn’t seem to work as well for the second (“I was utterly floorboarded”).

Utterly doesn’t work for drunk because it’s the affix for turning random objects into terms for *shocked*, obviously.

… huh.  I thought that might just be the similarity to “floored”, and yet “I was utterly coat hangered” does seem to convey something similar.

I have to tell you, I am utterly sandwiched at this discovery.

Completely makes the phrase mean “super tired”.

“God, it’s been a long week, I am completely coat-hangered.”

Something is

Something is wrong with our language

Is it a glitch or a feature?

Feature

this neat feature is called collocative substitution, and it occurs when certain words are strongly linked to certain context and/or phrases. when you read/hear a pair of words that usually wouldn’t go together, your brain fills in the context with what would normally be inferred, given the originally phrased pairing. thus, finding out that there’s a term for this phenomenon may indeed leave you utterly sandwiched. lesser known or less strongly linked phrases and pairings may not be able to translate substituted words to appropriately fit the inferred context, so you were not utterly floorboarded at the club last night, but rather you were absolutely floorboarded, and as this explanation continues to drag on, you may by the end of it find yourself completely coathangered from read it all.

I, like all linguists I have met or even heard of, have a deep intricate love-hate relationship with the English Language because of complete and total coathangering like this

This could save your life.

BOOST.

Absolutely vital information to have if you live where the waters freeze over.

I especially appreciate this guy's commitment to actually showing the steps himself. That cold-shock response is a bitch and willingly subjecting himself to it couldn't have been fun.

I don’t live anywhere near water like this, but I am still memorizing this knowledge because:

* I might use it in a story someday.

* Any knowledge that staves off the dying is good knowledge.

Some kids passed away today in my region from falling in icy water, so thought it was important to boost.

sometimes you just gotta listen to music at a volume that you know will be part of the cause of your hearing loss at the age of 28

hey yall. im 25 now and i already have tinnitus <3 dont do this. LOL

oh btw for those saying “i already have tinnitus haha it cant get worse” YEAH IT CAN BITCH! if you want to listen to music loud do it on speakers at least. headphones will Beam Pain Waves Directly Into Your Cochlear Hair Cells and a 10kHz Tone Loud Enough Will Give You Psychic Damage Forever

if i have to fucken, translate it to something you’ll understand? Imagine theres a picture of garfield here saying

YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE TO HEARING LOSS

special shoutout to all the 50+ year old men who record 2min basic tutorial videos for simple tasks with their shaky cell phone vertical camera and upload them to youtube to get like 20 views. y'all are the true backbone of society

HELP

💀💀💀💀💀

Taking photos of snakes is a lot harder than you’d think 😂😭

i thought you were protecting their identity

Okay yes that’s all

Sorry everyone for post spam blame tumblrs image limit