im like if a girl was {undefined variable}. im like if a girl was [fragment missing]. im like if a girl was (editor’s note: the author’s invocation of the word “girl” in this context is idiosyncratic, perhaps metaphorical) im like if a girl was im like if a girl draft deleted! im like if a girl You have reached your free article limit! Subscribe now to continue reading. im like if a girl was [THREAD LOCKED] im like if a girl (ENDING EXPLAINED!) im like if a girl Unusual activity detected, please highlight all the pictures of bicycles. im like if a girl I don’t respond to prompts that could be deemed offensive, and so I am unable to carry out the request. im-like-if-a-girldeactivated03092023. im like if a girl we are unable to take your call at the minute. im like if a girl isn’t registered under that name. im like if a girl could give you her date of birth. im like if a girl oh yes we have you under […]. im like if a girl LOST CONNECTION

By popular demand (a reblog from @doodleswithangie) we present the ✨Concussion Cut✨ of Ben Schwartz's (@rejectedjokes) Renfield Answer Time interview with @overchers.

please not another wave of sex bots

They don’t even have porn!!!!!!!!!!

Hi new Tumblr users

Please know this sites hashtagging system is categorical and NOT clout based

Aka if I look up the “Wendell and Wild” tag, I should find clips, media, art and posts related to Wendell and wild ONLY. Same with any other random tag searched

If I spy a selfie, a random neighborhood, or any other kind of “insta” post trying to take likes for a popular hashtag, I’m reporting you for spam. Most other long term users will too and your acct will be fast tracked as a spam blogger and blocked.

You will not ruin the last non corporate site for us, especially by trying to treat this site like influencers matter. If you get popular, it’s bc you’re a clown w a skill not bc your hot or rich or skinny, got it?

#holy shit at people in the notes this isn't 'tyrannical' it's basic courtesy AND against the tos #the spam report button is easily accessible for this exact reason #cross tagging is absolutely reportable spam according to tos so just don't do it #it also doesn't get you any more notes it just pisses people off

Like for real guys: This is against TOS. It is not allowed. It is spam. IT is not less spam because you are not a botfarm. Don't do it.

i had a fever dream about hrt gummies

[tip me im broke lol]

"Do you wish your vacheena was a peeNis or geegnis is vagengi. Want big boober or tiddied explode of [reverberating] fuck."

"Introducing H R T. Destosteroast. Estrager. Whendsforiain't forya."

it's about the implications

this is very true but also i couldn’t think of a predator for a cat so this is the best i could do with what i had

I respectfully disagree, sir noctude, because arcades lack one thing that Chuck E. Cheese has, performers. So, you may ask, what businesses have games, food, and performers?

a casino

now this is some semantic bullshit i can get behind

masks and helmets that hides someone's face in such a way that they become the face themselves my beloved

these are all creatures to me

Angel of War, angular and strange, gleaming silver and gold, Angel of Wonder, pure and one-eyed, looking to stars new and old, Angel of Harvest, simple and hidden, bring nature's sweetness to all, Angel of Health, mysterious and fine, beacon when life starts to fall, Angel of the Deep, crooked and cage-like, guide us across the sea, Angel of Solace, protect us from evil, lead us to where we are free.

(image description:) a phrase - angels of - followed by bright-on-black drawings of helmet-covered faces of: a knight captioned as war, an astronaut captioned as wonder, a medieval beekeeper captioned as harvest, a plague doctor captioned as health, an old-fashined diver captioned as the deep, a gasmasked person captioned as solace (/end description)

a quick fanart to the concept; do you think a motorcyclist and a person in a surgical mask and cap may join these ranks?

I claimed Jesus in a roleplay server and I was really bummed that for the next 3 days I couldn’t use him.

pretty sure in Catholic canon Jesus went to hell in those three days so guess what (:

HE WHAT

It’s called the Harrowing of Hell and it is a part of catholic mythology! The idea is that while Christ was dead for three days, he went to hell and just kinda…whooped ass until he came back.

He girlbossed his way out of that one, methinks

It’s weird to think this comic predates the rise of Internet spam, though otherwise it reads like it could’ve been drawn yesterday.

I've been thinking about the phrase "verbing weirds language" for nearly 30 years

hobbes in the last panel deconstructing twitter decades before it’s invention

Casually adding "Well, I'm phasing" to my lexicon.

Seems appropriate this evening

Surprised you forgot these two

@tgirlteeth

I don't know about this one, Dollar General

they're letting just anybody order a happy meal nowadays

i saw a sad person order one a d the employees jumped the counter and poured hot oil all on him and shatteredhis ankles with spatulas

they're letting almost anybody order a happy meal nowadays

Anything to do with Croatia ever: *happens*

Tumblr:

@one-time-i-dreamt

Me when I get summoned to another post about Croatia:

I promise you that no one in Croatia knows who I am

I don't know who Mark is but 6'4 is pretty tall!

I’m glad my silly badly edited meme has ended with one-time-I-dreamt dot tumblr dot com being declared a certified prophet in accordance to the teachings of Jesus Christ

Thank you to all involved, but especially tall mark

I can assure you markiplier is not tall

He is taller than me!

Markiplier is Croatian?

Just know I have not known peace since making this post

Good!

i wish all trans girls a very kissed on the face by someone they love

i wish all trans boys a very kissed on the face by someone they love

i wish all nonbinary people a very kissed on the face by someone they love

i never thought of it that way @the-white-eye, i was hesitant to think about doing this but now i really really want to XP