Dear future Eurovision writers,

4 of this year's top 5 songs were NOT IN ENGLISH. The other one was this

TAKE NOTES

At one point everything was perfect

France and Switzerland were SOOOOO cocky and then Italy got that 300 points like

THANK YOU EUROPE, YOU'RE THE REAL ONES, FUCK THE JURY

Italian hosts: we’re gonna get undressed if Italy win

AND THEY DID IT

Italy winning moodboard

winning felt as good as watching the enthusiasm slowly whither away from malta, switzerland and france’s faces as the public votes poured in

Things ESC 2021 will be remembered:

The public was like ...

Hopefully Flo Rida has earned his freedom from San Marino.

Aside from Italy having won after a lull for a while this evening really will go down in Eurovision history for having 4 COUNTRIES get 0 votes from the public. That was insane and hilarious.

but apart from europe's collective horniness, zitti e buoni is actually a bloody good song

THIS IS REVENGE FOR MAHMOOD!!!!!!!!!! ITALY FUCKING WINS!!!!!!!!!!!

Modern art

What eurovision jury think Europe Wants: 500 boring ass ballads that sound identical

What Europe REALLY Wants: 2000's rock, bisexuality, EDM Slavic Folk, Whatever Iceland has going on

jury: Switzerland!!!! France!!!! our winners!!!

europeans casting their votes:

ITALY WOOOOOOOON

THIS IS HOW YOU FUCKING DO EUROVISION, THIS IS HOW YOU KNOW THAT THE PUBLIC ISNT ACTUALLY FUCKING DUMB LIKE THE GODDAMN PROFFESSIONAL JURY

EUROVISION DRAMA IS ON ANOTHER LEVEL NOTHING IS LIKE THIS

THE SPLIT VOTE IS A GODSEND I FUCKING LOVE THIS DRAMA