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@mapleglowsticks / mapleglowsticks.tumblr.com

Gunnery Sergeant Allyn, Second Division, Eradication Corps. Kill count: 452 Porn Bots!! :D Join the EC! Hoo-ah! [Homestuck OC: Katuna Oelsie] Avatar: Palossand Banner: https://www.instagram.com/wanderson_reimonkey/
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mapleglowsticks
piss-pirate

this is silly because if you look closely you can see that the tiger is not an actual tiger but a Beanie Baby, a popular childs toy.

is that true?

i promise

it cant be

mapleglowsticks
a-tired-dm
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razzledazzy

My favorite thing about Dungeons & Dragons is how fucking quickly people become ride-or-die bitches with each other

no lie i had a campaign where I tried playing a really chaotic neutral “leave me alone” rouge and ended up attached at the hip to our monk who couldn’t roll higher than a natural 10 to literally save his life bc in our first encounter he called my character “a nice lass” and that was all it took

Once made a tinker type halfling and realized that it was actually a really terrible idea since 1) nobody else in the party was mechanical and 2) there weren’t really any weapons that depended on my character’s skills to use. So he was basically a tiny little short dude who was really good at fixing watches, making and throwing alchemist fires and creating warmachines (if he had the time). We also used a homebrew point system where if you crippled your character you could get more points to spend on other things - so poor little Halfling tinkerer had two leg braces, moved at half the speed of everyone else, had an addiction to smoking/chewing tobacco/alcohol and didn’t have the eyesight to use long range weapons/rifles. 

He was useless in the current team comp of Elf Sorcerer/Wizard, Human Fighter and Dwarf Cleric of sorts.

Until someone joined and rolled a Warforged. They were inseparable, to the point where I put points in ride and got the DM to give us a little custom harness/saddle so my character could hitch a ride. The Warforged wanted to discover why it was created and what it meant to exist; the Halfling wanted to create something close to the deathstar. 

Imagine this - you’re a shitty villain waiting for the heroes to arrive. You know three of them are generic elf/human/dwarf combo with magic, and the fourth is a shitty little halfling, when suddenly a Warforged comes charging through the goddamn wall (John Cena style) with a Halfling riding him like Mother Fucking Mad Max Master Blaster. The Warforged is a monk throwing Str 20+ punches with the fury of his machine god behind his fists while his tiny crippled buddy, who repairs him in exchange for a ride/protection, is suspended in a child’s carrying harness throwing alchemist fire with one hand and shooting off a revolver with the other. 

Death comes for you, and it’s in a baby carrier on 7′ of fist.

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stereofeathers

I

mapleglowsticks
theforgottenkey

a few towns over there used to be a golf course with a bunch of statues and one of them was a huge orange dinosaur which became a local landmark. like this dinosaur was beloved. but its also important to note that its hideous. like really, really fucking ugly. and so more recently the golf course got removed and an apartment building was being built, and everyone was FURIOUS at the thought of them removing their precious, disgusting orange dinosaur, so the town had no choice but to leave it up. so now there is a brand new shiny apartment building with an anatomically incorrect orange dinosaur overlooking the horizon

i don’t think my description does it justice actually. here’s the man himself

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scifigrl47

To note: there is currently a petition to replace the statue of Christopher Columbus in Boston’s North End (it was recently beheaded) with the Rt. 1 Orange Dinosaur.

I’m not making this up.

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A petition to replace the Christopher Columbus statue with the Route 1 orange dinosaur is gaining steam, sort of
The change.org petition was inching toward its 2,500-signature goal by mid-day Sunday.
Boston.com