Mushrooms are objectively the funniest thing on gods green earth like this one destroys your liver and kidneys and kills you this one makes a fine cooking oil this one introduces you to the machine elves this one grows in your shower and slowly destroys your lungs this one is delicious in a stir fry. Who else has the range
Who did you have to kill to get that username
nobody it was just available
BACK TO THE AFTERLIFE WITH YOU
a group of wizards playing "dont let it touch the ground" with a magic missile, giggling like children and bouncing it back and forth like a balloon, until one of them drops it and dies screaming in the most horrific explosion you've ever seen. the other wizards are unphased and continue the game with a new missile like nothing happened.
vampires really should be able to get drunk they literally have to be alive forever let them have this
hc: vampires have no blood so they get drunk faster than people
charlie pulling over a shirtless carlisle at 4 am: dr cullen your blood alcohol content is literally 100% how are you not dead carlisle: au contraire im absolutely dead
I did not expect a decent twilight joke on my dash in 2019, but nevertheless there it is and it’s hilarious.
i couldn’t make this up even if i tried
i’m crying.
Y'all need to type paragraphs of arguments less and learn to say “blow me bitch” to people
tylor swift fans are class traitors for not running her off this site long ago. shes a celebrity promoting something on here in 2021 and thats just wrong and your fault that im being forced into seeing it
I don’t know what’s worse about this class traitors, or tw celebrity.... I just want to know why this is recommended to me...
The sheer amount of people hating on T Swift just because she has a tumblr is really weird imo. Like, let a girl vibe and just exist - y'all need to touch some grass I stg
Wh... Why are people so mad at her for advertising her products? Like literally every single other person or business in the entire world??
i was joking when i said class traitors but im not joking anymore
Every time you reblog this it makes a baby boomer vandaluse their own untouchable China cabinet in rage.
This post just made me realize that its been almost two months since the orange menace was removed from office and I haven’t heard a single thing about him in that entire time. I cannot tell you how freeing it is to not have to hear about him every single day anymore
hmmm
POV: you are an uber eats driver
do you ever wonder how many videos you’re in on youtube if you’re a person who plays online games. like, i don’t mean directly involved but surely some person hitting a clip or doing something nuts in a game you play has had you in the background at some point. maybe you were part of a kill comp in something or like, something like that. you know what i mean it’s not about you but you just happened to be in the video even if for a second. how many videos are you in
No
alright joel i’ll fuck off then
this is me
anime can be saved now
anime’s redemption story
I was a bit skeptical about that whole “twitter is just tumblr now” schtick beyond being a joke but
jesus fucking christ the clout from this six-year-old take
This is kind of like when you’d get made fun of for liking “weird” things in middle school and then several years later some famous person would be like “remember -blank- it was so funny lol” and then suddenly all the people who made fun of you for liking blank are like wearing 35 dollar tee shirts with blank on them and posting blank for clout
