Yes, this is Dog!

homestuck fans when they see a flight of stairs

oh that was great. sorry I got cum all over you, here's the shittiest towel you've ever seen in your life.

One of my favorite thing I’ve learned about animals studies is that you should avoid using colorful leg bands when you’re banding birds because you can accidentally completely skew the data because female birds prefer males with colorful bands

Apparently if you put a red band on a male red wing blackbird his harem size can double

So like you can completely frick up the natural reproduction of a group of birds by giving a guy a bracelet so stylish that females CANNOT resist him

Me, putting a red bracelet on the leg of a male red wing blackbird: ON GOD we gonna get u some pussy bro

I remember reading a study where researchers realized that female birds of a certain species preferred males with a darker breast. So they created what they literally called a “Super-Sexy Male” by catching a male and coloring his chest with a marker. They then ran dna tests on the eggs in the area.

Previously when the researchers had run these tests, they found a certain amount of infidelity was common for these birds. Somewhere around 10% of eggs were fathered by males who were not the primary mates of females.

After the advent of the Super Sexy Male, however, stuff got crazy in bird world. Infidelity skyrocketed, with upwards of 25% of ALL EGGS in the area being fathered by this specific male. Furthermore, his mate’s eggs were 100% his.

This is just insane to me. Just imagine you’re living your bird life when suddenly somebody scribbles on Dave’s chest and the ladies can’t stop throwing themselves at them. It’s stupid that we theoretically can wreck this kind of havoc on an ecosystem.

via @elytrians

"Re Blog" to PERMANENTLY become some sort of fucked up creature or demented beast

YOU hates terfs

rb if u hates terfs

TERFs deserve the absolute worst.

Gordon Freeman is a man who fucked everything up by following directions (from his workplace) (directions were put the orange rock over there). And he is seen as a hero.

Lamarr the headcrab fucked everything up by following directions (from her heart) (directions were be a little animal that likes jumping). And what does Lamarr get. Nothing. This is called sexism

I remember in my Arabic class we were going over the alphabet and the teacher was like there’s no ‘P’ etc and this white girl was like wait what but my names Paige and my teacher was like lol then we’d pronounce it as beige and she was so offended I’m crying thinking about it

One of my mom’s friends, Hugh, went to France and they had a lot of trouble pronouncing his name because the entire thing was silent.

salut je m'appelle [REDACTED]

lol when I lived in France my host family had a friend names Hugh. We saw him and his family a lot.

They pronounced it “oog” and I didn’t know until the day before I left France that his name was Hugh. I just thought he had some weird caveman nickname 😭

that is hands down the funniest addition to this post

(person who doesn't give money to homeless people because they might spend it on drugs voice) That feeling when you need a little treat to get through another day of adulting

osama bin laden abuse you

IM GONAN SELL THIS 8DEA TO DAVE N BUSTER && MAKE A BAZILLION DOLLAR$

this gag from tails gets trolled occupies permanent real estate in my brain because it has no right being this good

Check out her cool bug

Ok y’all brace yourselves cuz I just learned about a new animal

Yes, that is an animal. Yes, scientists refer to it as the purple sock worm. No, that’s not it’s real name, silly, it’s real name is Xenoturbella!

When these deep-sea socks were first discovered, no one knew what the fuck they were looking at (and, really, can you blame them?). They have no eyes, brains, or digestive tracts. They are literally just a bag of wet slop. DNA analysis initially seemed to indicate that they were related to mollusks, until the scientists realized that DNA sample was from the clams they had recently eaten (yes, they can eat with no organs. We don’t know how.)

Scientists then analyzed the data again and tentatively placed them in the group that includes acorn worms, saying that their ancestors probably had eyes, brains, and organs, but simplified as a response to their deep sea ecosystems.

Later DNA testing has since shown that they are their own thing! Xenoturbella, along with another simple and problematic to place creature called acoelomorphs, belong to their own phylum called Xenacelomorpha! This places them as the sister group to all bilateral animals. So, they just never evolved brains, eyes, or organs. They are a glimpse at a very primitive form of animal that never bothered to change, because apparently what they do works. Rock on, purple sock worm.

Real "Luigi Wins By Doing Nothing" animal here.

Peggy. I could not help but overhear via the listening devices I installed in your home that Hank is now streaming on Twitch.

Dale, for once your lack of regard for our boundaries has saved me some effort. He insists his grill streams will promote propane awareness but he has gone too far.

Oh, I don't know Peggy, he seems to really be having fun with it! Plus the cat ear headphones are kinda cute.

The what.

Bahaha Hank out here shillin propane like a gotdang egirl talk about them propane emoji hotdog water somethin else man I tell ya hwhat. can't gotdang hear him over streamlabs noise goin pew pew pew talkin bout donatin bits n shit man, pogchamps in the chat and dogs on the grill, real piece of work man.

Hank, you have got to stop this! Think of your family!

Peggy, I can't end the stream now, I'm getting "Pogs in the chat." That means people think propane is cool!

I got this, Peggy.

Hank, have you heard of something called "Rule 34?"

BWAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

yall i just realized the middle guy is Riz Ahmed I remember seeing this post fucking three years ago wtf

So I was doing some research and this fb thing was posted in 2013

and Riz Ahmed didn’t burst onto the Hollywood scene until 2014 with Nightcrawler (I know he was steadily working in England but I’m talking about worldwide fame that only Hollywood brings)

ON TOP of that, he filmed The Night Of in 2012, but it didn’t get released until 2016. Which means in this photo he has already filmed the role that will earn him bank and an Emmy, but in his mind he’s still just a struggling artist who may never “make it”. This image has level 5,000 in power. BUt also it means he was famous before he was famous, and he probably didn’t even know it. What a Godamn STAR

LIKE DO YOU THINK HE KNOWS THERE WAS FAN ART DRAWN OF HIM BEFORE THERE WAS FAN ART DRAWM OF HIM???

still reeling from the cronut debacle and i'm just now finding out about croffles? why are we as a society enabling this

excuse me??

in tears every time i check this account

I firmly maintain my opinion that everyone wants to fuck Kikuri until they actually fuck her and then no one wants to fuck Kikuri

Transmascs need to normalize saying "my dick exploded" when we have a period

"It's that time of the month again."

"Penis explosion?"

"Penis explosion."