SCREAMING

*clicks page 2 of google search results* the deep web

IDK = I’m Donkey Kong

BRB = Bring Ripe Bananas

LMAO = Love My Awesome Orangutan 

TBH = The Banana House

IMO = intense Monkey Obsession 

like for bread, reblog for bread, ignore for bread

when i get murdered i want it to be so perfect and mysterious that i get featured on buzzfeed unsolved true crime with only one theory and it’s about aliens

im gay

gratefully accepting your donations to me via paypal

I need to snort a fucking line of self confidence

he 😜👦 was a skater 🚴🎿 boy 🎸🎮🚬she 🙅 said 💬 see you later 👋 boy ✌️ bush did 9/11 he🚶wasn’t good enough 👺 for her💅💆💇👰

i am a simple man, i see my cats paw, i squeeze it

i see my cats little nose, i kiss it

When the depression meme fad ended but u still have like……actual depression

im writing this movie and theres this character named, Yung Sandwich, and hes a rapper… but he gets killed and theres this line

“oh fuck, I killed Yung Sandwich.”

Just Girly Things

-spiking everyone’s drinks with bleach -painting your vag yellow bc your boyfriend likes the Simpsons -blood -setting yourself on fire to burn calories -using super glue as lube so you can be together forever - sacrificing your bff for a pair of rainbow crocs -bathing in everclear -throwing your iPhone off the balcony to see if you get better service -sucking dick for an oreo mcflurry -doing bath salts with your algebra teacher -eating your Barbie Chapstick because it tastes like bubble gum -getting yourself deported so you can travel for free -sending your nudes to Obama for a free flip phone

good night. sleep tight. don’t let the bed bugs bite. tonight. imma fight. till we see the sunlight. tik tok. on the clock. but the party don’t stop.

not for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just tryna have a stress free, rose scented, dior lip glow tinted week..