IDK I'm thinking I might be a lesbian?? Like every once and a while I like a guy but I'm wondering how much of that is compulsory heterosexuality. Anywho, I was wondering how u figured out u were a lesbian.

okay SO

for me, it was a three year process. i had assumed i was bi, bc i found some celebrities mildly attractive, and while i’d never had a crush on a girl, that felt the most right. i first told my girl scout leader, bc she asked, and it was easiest to tell someone i didn’t know. she was supportive. i later told my mother in a parking lot outside of a greek pizzeria’s, and we stood in the snow for two hours w me sobbing and my whole family waiting in the car. fast forward a year, and i just. was not attracted to the boys in my classes. i could recognize their attractiveness, sure. but when they talked or when my friends gushed about thomas or nick or whomstever, i just couldn’t understand. i still hadn’t gotten a crush on a girl though, so u can imagine my confusion and fear. but gay felt right, like bi was a pair of jeans one size too big, so i thought abt “gay” and it fit better. it wasn’t until high school in freshman year that i got my first “crush” (if u could even call it that. she was attractive and she gave me attention, and was a bit flirty. i just found her attractive) and i decided i wanted to tell my family for real. but the process of figuring out that i was a LESBIAN, not bi, not gay, not anything but a lesbian, took forever. figuring out the difference between finding someone aesthetically pleasing (ie attractive) and literally being attracted to them can take forever. for me, it was about two years until i figured it out. it can take far longer for some, and sometimes much shorter of a time (altho i’ve never heard of that situation). there are a million things limiting us from figuring out if we’re lesbians, ranging from the disgust put into the term lesbian to the forced heteronormativity that causes all women to want to be attractive/acceptable to all men, even when we don’t really want to be. there wasn’t really ever an aha moment when it came to me being a lesbian, it was a process and it still is