What voice do yall imagine when you read "nice cock!" For me it's the announcer from Mario Golf Toadstool Tour
While we’re complaining, I’m also getting really tired of staff replacing commonly used, muscle memory features with new features to force us to repeatedly click on the new feature, only to “hear our concerns” and “roll it back” when it was only ever a transparent way of forcing us to interact with the new features
Replacing the search tab with tumblr live, replacing the BLOG tab of all things with tumblrmart, and now replacing the add tags button with an add community labels button. It’s getting kind of infuriating!
And I’m not even opposed to tumblrmart and community labels! I’m using them. I just hate getting slapped in the face with them for weeks at a time!
That’s not even to mention replacing double-tap to zoom with double-tap to like (a feature which was already present on posts but now applies to images you’re looking at), replacing “swipe down to exit image” with “swipe down to see a random assortment of images from people you don’t follow and never will”, and whatever godforsaken thing is going on with the new video player that never loads
And this fucking guy that won’t go away even while I type this!!
imagine if you like bought a house and the realtor that sold you the house came by and did maintenance every couple months and it was a pretty good arrangement until one day they stopped doing maintenance and things started breaking them and you called them up and they were like 'surprise! we've decided what this house is really missing is a pool so we're going to build a whole new house for you that has a pool we are so excited about this pool' and you were like 'is this a deflection from your sexual harassment lawsuit you're involved in' and they were like 'the pool is going to be so cool!' and hung up and you didn't hear from them for years and then they called you up again and were like 'good news! we've built the new house, why don't you move in' and you were like 'oh, the one with the pool?' and they were like 'wellll yeah but we haven't actually installed the pool yet but when we do it's going to totally transform how you live in your house so you can see the value' and you were like 'i don't know i think i'll stay in this one' and they were like 'hmm yeah sorry actually you can't we're blowing the old house up with dynamite' and you were like 'what? why?' and they were like 'so that you're not split between your old house and the new one' and you were like 'um, fine' and you drove over to the new house and there was no pool or space for a pool and the realtor showed up to gave you the keys and you were like 'this house looks identical to the old one, i don't really understand why you did this' and they were like 'aha! you see, the old house had six rooms, this one has five!' and you were like 'that sounds worse, though' and they were like 'no you see with only five rooms it will be much easier to do maintenance on the house' and you were like 'but you haven't done that for months' and they were like 'yeah that was the old house which we've just blown up with explosives this is the new house' and you were like 'so how's that sexual harassment lawsuit going' and they leaped acrobnatically into their car like a trapeze artist and zoomed away and you went into the house and saw a coin slot on the bathroom door and called them and you could hear the background noise of a courtroom and they said 'yeah so you have to pay five dollars every time you use the bathroom now, it's our new monetization plan' and you were like 'well this is bullshit i feel like this house is just straight up worse' and they were like 'noo listen the pool is going to be so cool it's going to be so good we promise there'll be a diving board and a tiki bar and those water jets that give young people sexual awakenings' and you were like 'well okay' and they were like 'we've been building this pool for four years trust us it's going to be good' and then you didn't hear from them for a long long time except occasionally when they showed up to do maintenance and if you asked about the pool they just winked meaningfully and asked if you wanted to pay a $15/month fee for a bathroom pass giving you unlimited flushes and toilet paper. and this went on for a year until one day you got a voicemail 'dear resident. we're not going to build the pool lol' and you called them back like 'well what the fuck did you demolish my old house for' and they were like 'we actually gave up on the whole pool like two years ago but we did a whole announcement and it would have felt sooo awkward to walk it back' and you were like 'what the fuck have i been paying five dollars to use the toilet for over these last two years!' and they were like 'listen buddy if you don't like it you can buy the bathroom pass' and then they hung up on you . anyway that's what happened with overwatch 2
ppl are like ooh succession spoilers are gonna be unavoidable meanwhile i have seen like 2 screenshots from the show over the course of its entire existence
please look at the name of this drink i saw at a boba place the other day
Franco’s Agony (He Never Dies in Spain) - Miroir Noir (Slovakia, 2011)
[Showing you my camera roll] oh yeah heres me lost in the forbidden wood, afraid
there's a rare special kind of girl you can only find adrift in the hulks of ruined spacecraft or long buried tombs or inside sealed canisters with warning signs all over
Horror movie fans, reblog and share in the tags the film that fucked you up the most and why?
he’s going The pisstance
he’s going For peed
sometimes i really do like it here
sometimes you just gotta listen to connie's theme stevenuniverse and
