Professional Nobody

I'm gonna link to the animations in case y'all either don't remember or have never heard of some of these.

A quick note: these were made in the 2000s. Comedy is subjective, there's some strong examples of dark and/or "lolz teh random" humor in these. Maybe some cultural blindness, too. That said, enjoy a time capsule of stuff made before/during the birth of Youtube, now hosted on Youtube.

Kenya

Salad Fingers, episode 2

End of Ze World

Schfifty Five

The Hamster Dance

Badgers

"Rejected" by Don Hertzfeldt

Charlie the Unicorn

The Llama Song

Peanut Butter Jelly Time

I liked this post, scrolled for like another minute before I went “SHIT FUCK SHIT” and scrolled back to reblog it

I always reblog this one when I see it on my dash. When someone posts their own art, writing, or music here they are really hoping you will share it.

Amphibian migration season is coming this spring. Remember to drive slow!

It's about to happen*

*in the northeastern United States and parts of Canada

The Last Jackalope

not now kitten, daddy's about to have a mental breakdown from seeing the prices at the grocery store

this getting 20 notes in under a minute... we need to start killing the government

i think a thing a lot of people miss with the 'ludonarrative dissonance' angle on JRPG combat/'gameplay' vs story is that JRPGs are basically structured like stage plays in that they expect you to suspend a lot of your disbelief while interacting.

the combat mechanics being different from how people fight in the story cutscenes is not an accident, they are shifting to match the tone of the action

The person next to me in the train station is eating dicks and it smells so damn good

Wait wait fuck goddamn, dicks is a burger brand, there is not a woman giving head right next to me, she is eating fries and I’m hungry for FRIES

The person next to me in the train station is eating dicks and it smells so damn good

Wait wait fuck goddamn, dicks is a burger brand, there is not a woman giving head right next to me, she is eating fries and I’m hungry for FRIES

I regret to inform you that Discord's new Terms of Service includes an arbitration clause. You can find it here https://discord.com/terms/#16. This clause includes an opt-out, which I have transcribed here:

You can decline this agreement to arbitrate by emailing an opt-out notice to arbitration-opt-out@discord.com within 30 days of April 15, 2024 or when you first register your Discord account, whichever is later; otherwise, you shall be bound to arbitrate disputes in accordance with the terms of these paragraphs. If you opt out of these arbitration provisions, Discord also will not be bound by them.

These clauses are underhanded ways that corporations seek to deprive you of your right to participate in class-action lawsuits and your right to a jury trial. (This does only apply to us users ,other people still spread the word though )

#whats arbitration someone help me

Bad news, @noodelzmop. Arbitration basically means that if you want to sue Discord for whatever reason, the dispute needs to be handled in house. Specifically, in their house. If you don't get this email out, you're basically signing away your right to legal recourse if they do criminally shitty stuff to you, like with the McDonalds app.

I have been told that emailing "I am confirming that as of the date of this email, I am choosing to opt out of binding arbitration to settle disputes with Discord." With the Email you used for your discord account is enough for the notice but take this with a grain of salt as this was not said by a lawyer

[Image description: a tag that reads “my only question sis what should an opt-out notice say”. End description.]

@a-captions-blog

TIL that Gothic literature makes a distinction between “terror” and “horror.” Terror is the sense of dread and apprehension that precedes an experience, horror is the sense of revulsion after an experience.

via ift.tt

Someone described the modern difference as such:  Fear is knowing that a werewolf is hunting you.  Terror is when you see it and it charges at you.  Horror is realizing that your feet are stuck to the floor.

lust is

I’d like to thank the brave sniper that stopped that final comment

Danny Phantom is a solidly okay, so-so kind of cartoon, unless you have specific Danny Phantom-shaped receptors in your brain, in which case it is sublime

This is not about the fanart, fanlore, fan-interpreted subtext, or any other "value-added" services, which, after nearly two decades of evolutionary pressure, have diverged into a completely different beast. This is about the cartoon, which has

and

Reblogging this version again because based on the notes I feel like some people are not understanding this post

dunken.mp4

Official Post of Massachusetts

i’ve only seen a few episodes of four’s era but i found this outtake and i’m fuckinf crying because of it. why does he say it as if that’s his actual line

chinese college girls slay (cr: 哭天喊地六仙女）

Maybe this is the wrong platform to pose this question given the average tumblr user but

Is it just me or did our generation (those of is who are currently 20-30 ish) just not get the opportunity to be young in the 'standard' sense?

Like, everyone I talk to who's over 40 has all their wild stories about their teens and 20s, being young and dumb, and then I talk to my friends and coworkers and classmates, and we just... dont.

My mom tells stories of skipping school to sneak across the border and spend the day at a bar in Mexico. I was threatened with not being allowed to graduate because of senior ditch day. One of my friends had to go to his first hour class on senior ditch day because the teacher, who almost exclusively taught seniors, arranged a huge exam that day with no available makeup days, specifically to punish kids who took part in ditch day. Our wild and crazy ditch day was playing mini golf and then stopping for ice cream on our way back to one of our friends' houses to play cards against humanity.

Don't get me wrong, we had fun. But all of that, threats of not graduating, threats of failing classes over a single test, over some mini golf and ice cream?

Throughout high school and early in college, my friend group got kicked out of malls, stores, and even a parking lot just for being there wrong. Not being loud of disruptive. Not causing problems. Just being there too long, or without buying anything.

My mom graduated high school, after repeating her senior year, without a single grade above a D, and was offered a full ride scholarship to a state university to play on their women's football team. I had a 3.8 GPA, multiple extracurriculars, a summer job, and over 100 hours of volunteer work, and barely got into that same university, and then couldn't afford to go there anyway.

We've made getting into college so important and yet so difficult that kids are sacrificing their childhoods for it.

Then they become adults and it doesn't go away. Your employer/ potential employers are searching your social media and internet presence so you'd better hope no one has ever posted a picture of you at a party, or with alcohol, or wearing revealing clothes, or whatever else they've deemed unprofessional. And if you want to go out it's a 10 dollar cover and drinks are at least 8 dollars, and you need to tip if there's any kind of live entertainment, who can afford to do all that regularly?

My physical therapist, when I was 18, told me about his 21st birthday, how the last thing he remembers is people taking body shots off him. I spent my 21st birthday alone, was in bed by 10pm because I had to be at work the next morning. My boss had already told me that they knew it was my 21st, and if I called out, she'd write me up for improper use of sick leave because you're not allowed to use sick leave for a hangover. I don't know anyone whose 21st birthday was a big deal. No one went out and partied for it.

I dont really know where I'm going with all of this. I guess I just don't understand the point of it all. We spend our youth working hard to provide a future that we still can't afford. We have to be responsible and professional as teenagers. And we get nothing out of it. We can't afford life or friends or fun. At least our parents got to have fun being young and dumb, we just got groomed on kik.

So I'm not the only one noticing this. I wish I had an answer or at least something to say about it. But I dont. I'm just tired.

The one in charge of carrying things

English added by me :)