Gays not knowing strap means gun and straights not knowing strap means strap on has been the funniest miscommunication on the Internet so far

As a woman, I gotta say, nerds and “nice guys” create the most awkward situations.

Ive been given a diamond bracelet by someone who I only knew by their D&D name.

Another guy gave me a birth stone necklace after I’d just had a break up and just couldn’t understand why I needed time

Ive come home from a late night of studying to find a guy sitting beside my apartment door at 11pm. He’d “been waiting for hours” and “just wanted to see me.” (I don’t have to tell you how scary it is to see a grown man in an empty hallway when you are all by yourself.)

Ive had a guy send me 1000+ text messages…which started as a conversation about cartoons, turned into a love confession, then turned into him calling me a bitch

Not to mention the ones with jungle fever whose wet dream is not only a “nerd girl” but an “exotic nerd girl.” (“exotic” is just a cute word for fetishizing women of color)

And ALL of these men were self proclaimed “nice guys.” But what they don’t understand is that what they consider “nice” is usually creepy. You are a grown ass man. Waiting outside for hours is horrifying to women. Giving gifts and expecting sex in return is not a “nice” thing to do. I just wish “nice guys” would realize that the things they think are chivalrous and romantic are straight up horrifying and sociopathic. They think their loner status deserves some kind of sympathy and I should be greatful for the attention. But if they saw things from the female perspective they’d realize that that kind of behavior is literally stalking and bribery

me who try to overwhelm you with expensive gifts right off the bat are showing a classic warning sign of future abusive behavior

There was a nerdy kid in hs that I’m pretty sure had a crush on me. I was nice to him- he was an all right kid- but he kept doing stuff like coming up to me at my locker to talk to me and then immediately leaving if anyone else came to talk to me, messaging me for long periods of time on fb, during which he started using names like “sweetheart.” I never played into it- I continued to keep him at arms length and was polite and friendly. It came to a head when he indirectly tried to ask for a ride home and I lied and said my parents didn’t like me giving rides to people they hadn’t met, and luckily (shouldn’t have to say that) he let it go.

A few months later on fb he was calling girls stupid idiots for dating assholes “who would just treat them badly again” with a heavy undertone of “why won’t they date me, I’d be nice to them” that ended with “girls don’t know what they want.” I commented on it telling him that wasn’t how it worked, but lacked the knowledge to explain it well at the time, and he clearly didn’t get it. Once I unfriended him he never talked to me again.

And in elementary school there was a very nerdy guy who was blatantly obvious about his crush on me (i admire the way he admitted it, by saying “i like you, you’re funny, smart, and kind”) and was always making me uncomfortable by staring at me, telling me really gross (sometimes borderline sexual) jokes, copying off my work, and staring at me constantly.

I really think these guys think any amount of general kindness (the kid in elementary school was bullied horrifically by everyone and I hope I didn’t participate in that much but it’s not for me to say) is interpreted as the potential for romantic interest, and they believe without a partner they’re a loser/someone being interested in them could fix all the problems in their lives… so instead of accepting kindness and starting a friendship and acknowledging that they can have full lives without someone liking them, they take it way too far and then whine when women don’t respond well to that/aren’t interested and act like these women have personally decided not to act upon supposedly hidden feelings because they really do hate them or something.

i had a kid in middle school who was literally obsessed with me, and it didn’t help that we had a class together (it was orchestra) so he would always move his chair next to mine. he’d put his arm around my shoulders and refused to remove it, he’d follow me and my friends around after class even after i told him to stop. it didn’t matter what excuse i gave to get rid of him, he either didn’t get the message or he didn’t care.

it creeped me out so damn much, and the worst part is everybody treated it as a joke. nobody took it seriously. they all thought he was “love struck” and they would make jokes about us being together and the whole thing made me so uncomfortable because i would try to find different ways to get to class so he wouldn’t see me, and when i got to class i would hide in the instrument room until class started so he wouldn’t talk to me.

i’m so damn glad he didn’t go to the same high school that i did.

Lynne Cox is an accomplished American open water swimmer. Twice, she held the record for the fastest crossing of the English Channel. Cox was the first woman to swim the Cook Strait and the first to swim the Straits of Magellan and around the Cape of Good Hope. Cox swam the Bering Strait from American soil to Soviet soil in 1987, at the height of the Cold War. 

Look at her. 

I know open water swimming isn’t really glamorous, but Lynne Cox is arguably one of the greatest overlooked athletes of the 20th century. 

And quite possibly a mutant. 

She can withstand water temperatures that you or I would die from because of her training and her body’s unique reaction to cold (you know how the blood will leave your fingers and toes when it’s cold, to preserve heat? her whole body does that, pooling her blood in her core and insuring her body temperature stays toasty where it counts).

She funded the Bering Strait swim herself, clearing out her bank account when she couldn’t get corporate sponsors. After she succeeded (to almost everyone’s surprise: if you get in the Bering Sea without serious gear you generally just die) Gorbachev mentioned her during treaty talks with Nixon: “Last summer it took one brave American by the name of Lynne Cox just two hours to swim from one of our countries to the other. We saw on television how sincere and friendly the meeting was between our people and the Americans when she stepped onto the Soviet shore. She proved by her courage how close to each other our peoples live.“

She wasn’t just the first woman to swim the Strait of Magellan. She was the first person to make it across. 

On top of setting multiple world records, she swam a mile+ to the coast of Antarctica, in just a bathing suit, and did not die. 

She’s swum over 50,000 miles. 

And look at her. This is a photo from when she was young, at the peak of her career and setting records all over the world. She is a great athlete. She is a human who can do things most humans would die trying. I’m sitting here at 1 AM getting all teary eyed because this is the first time I’ve looked up a photo of her and I am so surprised, so gratified, so overwhelmed to find out that this world record setter, this literal superhuman, has nearly the same body type as me. 

Since they wouldn’t let her be a fantasy creature in a video game, she just did it in real life, I guess.

Anyone who thinks there is just one athletic body type isn’t paying attention during the Olympics opening ceremonies.

Her body type is optimized for her sport. The shape of her body and the presence of fat both provide insulation to keep her core warm while she swims.

A lot of open water swimmers aren’t this chunky, but that’s because most of them are actually triathletes, and their body type is a compromise between the ideals for the different sports.

There really is no one way to be fit and athletic. For some reason, we tend to get ourselves hung up on the body type of track and field athletes, especially that of marathon runners (who tend to carry almost no extra fat) as the ideal.

Dude HOLY FUCK she’s a badass.

me

YOU WROTE THE RULES. READ THEM. 

November 30, 2018: Snow Leopard shot and killed in zoo

Well, here’s your daily dose of news. :/

This isn’t okay btw… like… no part of this is fine.

Margaash was killed on October 23, 2018. The zoo covered it up for a month and even told people that asked for him that he is still alive

End all zoos

I still laugh when they use the word gay in old Christmas songs

ella fitzgerald: make the Yuletide gay

me: don’t mind if I do!

Does she fancy me?

Or is she just being friendly?

My favourite game

Update: she fancies me

Update: She’s my girlfriend

Update: We live together

Update: We just got our first house 🏡

Update: Here’s us with our first Christmas Tree

Update: Here’s a little doodle of us I had commissioned for her birthday

Update, we’re engaged

THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER

having a permanent full time job is you thinking to yourself “so this is really the rest of my life huh” as you come home every single day before using your 4 hours of recreational activity to do nothing and then going to bed

do you think there was like…discourse about Jane Austen novels when they first came out

ladies’ weekly tea and reading club: welcome to the meeting. we have exiled Charlotte because she stans Mr. Wickham

you’re not falling behind. you are still young and have a whole life ahead of you. you have enough time to explore things u love and experience your life and make your goals come true and find reasons to live. take things one day at a time and don’t let the fear of falling behind stop you because life isn’t a race.

“In this essay I will” is a meme that only encourages the op to put forth ideas into the world without making a concrete claim allowing them to express ideas on a subject without conclusion while at the same time submitting a thesis as fact

“Thanks for coming to me TED talk,” in contrast, allows the op to claim that whatever statement they’ve said to be their final say on any given topic, but also allows people to grow on it as well, as are the nature of TED talks

We are creating shortcuts in communication and I love it

You kiddos have no idea how groundbreaking this was. Like there’s a reason THE lesbian website for a billion years was called After Ellen. She changed everything.

oh man you know that feeling that’s like kind of an ache right between your heart and your stomach? like nostalgic knowing of pain? that’s how the scared look in Ellen’s eyes makes me feel.  

Look at her hand too and how nervous she is. Every gay and lesbian person knows this feeling, because we know there are assumptions and consequences and there’s no telling how someone will react.

And let no one forget that she suffered consequences for this. It wasn’t just a moment of cathartic unburdening and then business as usual.

Right, she lost her first TV show. She worked hard to get up to where she is today.

Ellen lost her TV show and didn’t get offered another job for the next 3 years. All while facing harsh critic from most of the world. Not to mention that Oprah, who immediately said yes to playing her therapist in this episode, got her own fair share of disrespectful and mostly racist comments. All over this one episode on a sitcom. Correct me if I’m wrong but I believe that over 40 million people watched this episode to see the first openly gay character on television.

This is history and it better fucking be in the history books for next generations.

anyway, my older sister was adopted when she was almost 16 (kinda on accident too), and because of that she got away from an abusive household, went from barely passing classes to being an honour student, and launching into a career where she’s happy and healthy and paying her own way. just two years of parenting where she had 3 meals a day, a bedtime, and parents to help and protect her changed her life radically. Plus, i got an older sister

adopt teenagers.

i love that we and cats share pareidolia (seeing patterns where they dont exist), but instead of seeing faces in everyday objects like us, they see snakes

that computer cord? snake. string? small snake. cucumber? short fat straight snake

snake pareidolia is one of the strongest things in human minds too! people report freezing mid-stride before being consciously aware of a snake in front of them, and the same happens with coiled rope, etc. in humans and other primates. it’s even been proposed that the need to detect snakes was a factor in the development of primates’ insanely good color eyesight

It’s because snakes are wonderful and we must stop and admire them at any cost

🌽: why did the tomato blush 🍅: why 🌽: because he saw the salad dressing 🍅: lol girl with septum piercing: honestly it didn’t even hurt

Replacing “LGBT” with “Queers” was a mistake, allowing academic use of the word Queer was a mistake, and allowing corporate use of the word Queer was a gigantic fucking mistake

Not shaving and not wearing make up are literally nonbehaviors. They’re a complete lack of action. But doing nothing is considered masculine because men are the only ones who are allowed to just be.

I love this song