hope your pets stay healthy in 2017

I almost didn’t blog this and felt guilty

Not risking it

hope ya pets even healthier in 2018

when u scratch a cat’s chin and they lift their head up reblog if u agree

when u scratch a cat’s chin and they lift their head up reblog if u agree

i’m awful. but awful rhymes with waffle, so it’s not that bad

[every english speaking non american/Canadian sighs deeply]

omfg why the fuck would you pronounce awful like waffle? wtf is going on in america?

im trying to think how either of those words could possibly be pronounced in any other way

anal sneezes are cute as shit

sorry iphone the word i was looking for was “animal” sneezes better luck next time

this is not what i want to be remembered for

nintendo makes a mario 64 remake for the switch but it’s like one of those “hd” minecraft skins where the modes are still extremely low poly but the textures are all photorealistic 4k resolution imagery

Depression meal 191

3 blunts and a Twix

friend: whats up? you look sad whats wrong?

me: oh nothing

my mind: little foot’s mom

i wish i didnt look like a foot

me overhearing plans and wanting in

walking out of the house and bumping into someone who turns out to be hot

Children, this is dirt. 

 dirt?dirt?  dirt?dirt? dirt?dirt? dirt?  dirt?    dirt? dirt?    dirt? 

Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms who raised me alone in every pokémon game sorry our dads were all terrible

One of the gym leaders in 3rd gen was your dad

Anyways happy Mother’s Day to all the moms who raised me alone in every pokémon game sorry our dads were all terrible