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Lost-Duck

@lost-duck17

How’s the Swedish Christmas goat doing? Has it caught fire this year?

This is how apparently

Security never saved it before. This is just the next level of difficulty and the gradual increase has only acted as training and made the Swedes unstoppable.

The swedes r like^

Security has saved it for the last 3 years, what are you talking about?

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Well, it went via flaming arrow that one time, and tbh as a security pro there ain’t much you can do if someone shoots a flaming arrow over your head and into the goat.

Except, of course, nod in respect to your worthy and victorious opponent.

This wiki article is hilariously salty

STOLLEN? Isn’t this thing huge?

Yeah, I’m going to live-tumble my reading of this amazing wiki article. I’ll tag it “christmas goat” and “long post” if you want to block my nonsense. But you’ll miss gems like this:

There is only one sure way to save the goat. A mob that is filled with righteous anger.

But it doesn’t tell me WHO launched three successful attacks against the goats (btw there are two goats because the people who made the first goat got tired of people burning their goat, so they quit making it and another organization took up the task. The first organization started making their goat again after the second organization got into the Guinness Book of World Records for their goat’s size. So now the two groups continue to make separate goats.)

Now this is Christmas.

I don’t even know who I am rooting for in this situation.

Tumblr: #this fucking donut #can we talk about this fucking donut for a minute #can we #because on this donut #the sprinkles just comfortably melt into the icing #you can tell that they are so perfectly in tune with each other #and they’ve come so far from when the sprinkles just sort of sat on top #barely touching for fear of rejection #just ugh I can’t #otp: comfortably melting

4chan: here’s a picture of someone putting their dick in a donut.

reddit: that donut needs to go back into the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

academia.edu: Here is a pdf of the seminar paper I wrote about the erotics/poetics/semiotics/science of donut eating.

deviantArt:I did not steal this donut. I traced it so now it’s mine.

It got better

Fanfic.net: The donut is the setting for a high school AU, were two sprinkles meet and realise they have more in common than they ever thought possible, however, the mean chocolate sauce has caught wind of their secret relationship. Will they be able to make it together before it’s too late? M for a lemon flavoured donut.

This has officially become one of my favorite posts.

I JUST REBLOGGED BUT FANFIC MADE IT PERFECT

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Ladies and gentlemen, I present you with: The Internet.

archiveofourown.org: Graphic Depictions of Gluten, doughut/sprinkles, doughnut/glaze, doughnut/sprinkles/glaze, doughnut - character, sprinkles - character, glaze - character, dsg threesome, first time, morning doughnuts, AU - doughnutverse, omg i don’t even know, knotting

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just imagine Jason recording Batman angrily yelling “Nightwing!” then setting it as the sound for Dick’s phone alarm so in the next morning when it goes off he flips the fuck out

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LATER

Signing onto Tumblr after so long feels like coming home <3