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@lonkluvspizza

Just another autistic tumblr lurker.
(He/They)
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this is how the movie went right

Kronk: By whom, though? I might be your classic "hunk" body type, but I'm not exactly a top. I have a couple exes I could call that might be his type. Do you want someone who would take him out for dinner first, or just...

Yzma: ... I WANT you to KILL him!

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SHE IS A TRUE HERO 

No, she’s a bitch is what she is

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what do u mean???? it was clearly an accident she even said “Oooppsss”

LMFAOOOO

Look, rather than being petty and destroying it, why not talk to the girl. Really ask them why they are using the confederate flag. But no, low level terrorism is the answer.

LOW LEVEL TERRORISM?

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Low level terrorism

ICONIC

world heritage post

LAPD detonated 5000 lbs of fireworks in the middle of a residential area, injuring at least 17 people and causing $900 million in various damages in a low-income, majority-POC neighborhood.

They then continue to pursue caging the person whose fireworks they stole while news media misreports to cover for police incompetency and destruction.

It took TWO YEARS to get the names of those involved with this incident. There are people still protesting, still living in hotels, still with unfulfilled claims to the city from this shit

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hate it when I call myself a girl and then someone goes "you're not a girl you're nonbinary/agender" and it's like. I am whatever I say I am. freak. I am a girl I am a little guy I am the man of the owl. I am nothing. I am everything. do not presume to know me in anyway I do not know myself

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pokemon fans will literally be like “a four legged tiger would’ve been way cooler than a jacked heel wrestler with a flaming champion belt” you sound ridiculous

I bet octopuses think bones are horrific. I bet all their cosmic horror stories involve rigid-limbs and hinged joints.

To an octopus, a human is like a thinking being with blood-stained coral growing inside it.

I need to sit down and breathe into a bag for a while.

Its parts were obscenely limited in their movement. Each hinge could open or close only a small amount before reaching its limit, yet by working in concert they demonstrated unexpected dexterity, moving and manipulating the objects before it with cunning equal to my own. It was more torso than limb, as though a seal had been stretched and warped, given long grasping tentacles filled with bones like bars of coral.  It’s head was most horrid of all, flat and ovoid, jutting out too small from the trunk as though it belonged to a beast half its size.

The thing rose upon its lowermost appendages, two long trunks that ended in flat, protruding flippers that branched into stubby, grasping mockeries of a sucker. It’s triple-hinged uppermost limbs were similar, but the ends branched into five smaller tentacles, each with three hinges of their own.

I froze, as the thing’s gaze fell upon me and it opened its hideous fish-jaw, filled with thick, many-shaped teeth like white shards of stone, and spoke in a shrill, discordant babble. I felt its horrid dry grip on my flesh, as those hinged appendages closed on me like the legs of a crab.

I felt the heat of its body, tasted its noxious, oily flesh through my touch, and prepared for the end, and all went black as a swoon overtook me.

I awoke, some time later, the cold and comforting water, banished back to the comfort of the sea and the dark. I should be grateful I am alive. I should cast aside the experience like a half-remembered dream.

I shall never again go swimming in search of lights above. The last thing I recall before the darkness took me was my right eye popping free of the thing’s grasp enough to see into the distance for one brief moment.

I saw thousands of lights.

ok so it turns out “horror but it’s about something mundane from the perspective of a non-human animal” fucks severely

Before Steven was born Amethyst used to say ‘fuck’ all the time & so when he was a baby Greg had to sit her down and explain that she has to stop swearing around Steven because he’s young & impressionable

So Amethyst is like “but that’s my favourite word, when will be stop being young & impressionable so I can say it again??”

And Greg is like “uhh I don’t know, 15 I guess? 15 is probably old enough” 

“Got it”

flash forward to Steven’s fifteenth birthday and he is woken at dawn by Amethyst yelling “wake the FUCK up Steven it’s FUCKING TIME”

& he spends the entire day losing his mind

Steven: w-what’s happening

Garnet: *deadpan* Amethyst just got her favourite word back

Amethyst: *running around the house* FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

Greg: what’s going on

Amethyst: you said once Steven was 15 I could say fuck again

Greg, who only hazily recalls the conversation in question: ……i DID?

Amethyst: *runs outside* FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK *distant sounds of spooked birds*

Pearl: Steven the *whispering* F-word is a bad word that Amethyst USED to say before-

Steven: I know what fuck means Pearl

Amethyst: *stopping dead in her tracks* WHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATT??

Pearl: who taught you that word mister!!

Steven: um… Lars and Sadie… *mumbling* five years ago…

Amethyst: I’ve been denying myself my favourite word for FIVE YEARS for NOTHING??

Greg: uh even if he knows what it means it’s still not really appropriate for you t-

Amethyst: *running outside* FFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCK

Steven: …

Greg: …

Pearl: …

Garnet: …*quietly* fuck

Everyone else: O_O

Garnet: what. I missed it too

also Amethyst made a banner that says HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY STEVEN in very large writing

Connie: what’s going on

Steven: Amethyst is allowed to say fuck now

Connie: oh! are we all allowed to say fuck now??

Greg & Pearl in unison: NO!!

Peridot: what’s fuck